Michael Rush Caught On Camera Hitting Police With A Small DogBobby Woods, 17, Accused Of Drowning Boy To Make Room For His Unborn ChildMichael May Jailed After Trying To Dig Up Dad's Grave To Argue With CorpseMonica Foy Arrested On Assault Charge After Tweeting Cop Deserved ExecutionMan Captured On Camera Drowning 3-year-old Girl In Hotel Swimming PoolTwo Men Charged In Connection With The Murder Of Doctor Teresa SieversOklahoma Labor Commissioner Mark Costello Stabbed To Death By SonDeleon Smith Accidentally Killed Himself While Taking Selfie With GunMitchell Daughtry, 14, Accused Of Stabbing His Mother To DeathBody Of Julie Mott Stolen From Casket At Texas Funeral Home

Gurnee, IL — The lovely lass to the left is 56-year-old Carolee Bildsten. She’s been charged with one misdemeanor count each of aggravated assault and theft of services and also faces an ordinance violation for pedestrian under the influence. According to police, Bildsten, apparently intoxicated, skipped out on her tab at Joe’s Crab Shack and shuffled her drunken ass home Tuesday evening. An officer went to Bildsten’s residence to investigate the unpaid tab and, at some point during the discussion, was reportedly assaulted with what Gurnee police Commander Jay Patrick called “a rigid feminine pleasure device.” Now, depending on which article you choose to read, Ms. Bildsten here either physically assaulted the police officer with a rigid feminine pleasure device, or threatened to assault the police officer with a rigid feminine pleasure device…either way, there’s a dildo involved and you know I can’t pass that shit up! Anyway, the officer escaped injury and Bildsten was placed under arrest. She has already been released on a personal recognizance bond and issued a court date.…

Muskogee, OK — According to police, 18-year-old Aaron Michael Laconsello broke into the home of Christopher and Stephanie Lane late Tuesday night, walked right past Christopher, asleep on the couch, and entered the room of the couple’s two young sons. For reasons unknown at this point, Laconsello then stabbed 4-year-old Dakota Lane approximately 36 times with a pair of household scissors. Awakened by the noise coming from her son’s bedroom, a very pregnant Stephanie ran into the room and tried to intervene…she, too, was stabbed several times. While Stephanie’s injuries were non-life threatening, Dakota did not survive the vicious attack. Laconsello was arrested just blocks away from the scene less than two hours later. Police are still trying to determine a motive for the attack, but say it appears random. Neighbors say Laconsello has been staying with relatives at a home just two houses away from the Lanes’. One of those relatives, 19-year-old Colt Hooper, told police that he doesn’t think Laconsello even knew Dakota. He further stated that Laconsello isn’t a “mean person” at all, but he had been drinking the night of the attack.…

ALBUQUERQUE, N.M. — A 13-year-old student at Wilson Middle School has been arrested after pulling a prank on a fellow student. Rebecca Yanez says on Friday morning her 14-year-old daughter was with other students waiting outside the school for class to start when the boy walked up behind her and pulled down her shorts. “Her underwear also came off in the process and everything was exposed,” said Yanez. Since the girl’s monkey was exposed to a large group of students, the boy was suspended and arrested on charges of misdemeanor battery and interfering with the educational process.Veronica Garcia’s daughter goes to the school and feels the charges are a bit harsh. “I think that’s going a little overboard. It is a prank, and there are a lot worse things that happen to kids over here,” Garcia said. But Albuquerque police Sgt. Trish Hoffman disagrees. “The decision to make an arrest is that we take every incident extremely serious. We’re not going to make the decision if he was joking. What he did was inappropriate even if he was just joking.” Yanez says she will not pull her humiliated daughter out of the school as long as the boy is not there.…

Seneca, SC — Don’t you just hate it when you have one of those Mondays? You know, the kind where you’re called out to a burglary in progress and end up ‘rasslin around with a doped up nekkid guy who, for one reason or another, has a mouse stuck up his butt? A few of the deputies from the Oconee County sheriff’s department know exactly what kind of Monday I’m talking about. After receiving a complaint about a possible home invasion, officers made contact with the suspected burglar, identified as 31-year-old Noah Smith, as he lay face down and naked in the doorway of the victim’s home early Monday morning. When a deputy attempted to speak with Smith, he was slapped. The deputy, in turn, deployed his taser. The jolt had no effect on Smith and he was up and running. Reinforcements were called in. Deputies cornered Smith in the victim’s bedroom. A deputy managed to slip a pair of cuffs on Smith before he jumped off the victim’s bed and tried to kick other deputies in the room.…

Los Angeles , CA — When an East Los Angeles man arrived home around 7:30 p.m. Wednesday, he was confronted with a masked man in his driveway pointing a shotgun at him. Instead freaking out, the man realized he had a much bigger, and much deadlier weapon at his disposal — his SUV. So he steered towards the gunman, accelerated and drove into him. The SUV went over the sidewalk, through a fence and ended up in a yard with the man, 25-year-old Jason Perez, pinned underneath.  The front grill of the SUV effectively disarmed Perez and witnesses say that Perez began yelling for someone to help him.  Perez was freed after members of the Los Angeles County Fire Department tipped the vehicle on the its side. He was taken to the hospital for his injuries and then booked on assault with a deadly weapon charges. The driver of the vehicle was not arrested because he acted in self-defense, said Sgt. Michael Thomas. It’s not currently known why Perez threatened the driver, but if you watch the following news report with the Mary Beth McDade (who I hope is the one reporting on the Rapture so I can go to Hell with a solid boner), police say they think the men know each other.…

Fairplain, WV — According to police, an intoxicated 42-year-old Melissa Williams stumbled into her estranged husband’s room at the I-77 Motor Inn late last month and demanded oral sex before removing her pants and frillies.

Her estranged husband, Danny Williams, declined the invitation, but another male in the room, Adam Watson, figured he’d give it a go. Watson lost his nerve, though – and quite possibly the contents of his stomach – on approach.

He later told police that as he neared Melissa, he became overwhelmed by a horrible odor emanating from her vagina. And he, too, respectfully declined.

At that point, Ms. Rottencrotch reportedly grabbed a lock-back folding knife from a nearby table, pointed it at Danny and stated, “Somebody is going to eat my pussy or I’m going to cut your fucking throat.”

And I’m assuming that a stabbin’ was still preferable to getting anywhere near the woman’s funky fuck hole, because neither man budged.

Old Crusty Cooter was arrested and charged with domestic assault and brandishing a deadly weapon…by deadly weapon, I think they mean the knife.…

West Palm Beach, FL — A substitute teacher for Belvedere Elementary School has been fired after allegedly biting a 6-year-old autistic student on the arm in front of other teachers. It’s not being reported what provoked the man to attack the boy, but the two teachers who witnessed it reported the incident immediately. After learning what happened the school principal escorted the unidentified teacher, who had been filling in for a speech teacher, out of the classroom. “You don’t need to pay me for today, you’ll never see me again,” the teacher reportedly told the principal. A police investigation is currently underway The child’s mother and grandmother say that even though he cannot say how he feels that he is is very scared and will not let anyone touch his hand. I hate kids, autism or not, but I have never thought of biting one. Well that’s not true…but I’d never actually do it. But I also do not place myself in charge of kids like this guy. Hopefully he’s identified soon so I can replace the teeth pic and if guilty, punished appropriately.…

SALEM, Mass. — A father is facing charges after it is alleged he fired a paintball gun at three little girls and then tried to blame his 5-year-old daughter for pulling the trigger. Ricky Bettencourt, 37, is facing three counts of assault with a dangerous weapon after cops say he used a paintball gun to shoot at three girls, ages 11, 9 and 7, playing in the woods near their home. They asked him to stop, which he did for a brief time, before he started shooting at them again while laughing. When police arrived, Bettencourt denied shooting at the girls saying his 5-year-old daughter was to blame. When his daughter was questioned she revealed that her father was doing the shooting and that she had told him not to do it. Bettencourt admitted that he had consumed a few beers, but pleaded not guilty in court yesterday. He was released on his own recognizance until his December court date and is not to have any contact with the three girls.…

Woman Charged In Fork Attack

November 3, 2010 at 7:54 am by  

Northfield, MN — Police responded to a Northfield motel last week after getting a call about an intoxicated woman who reportedly got all stabby on her roommate. Upon arrival at said motel, officers spoke with the victim, an unidentified male bleeding from three different sets of puncture wounds to the left side and top of his head. He told police he was just hanging out watching TV when 44-year-old Michelle Lee Walgenbach started stabbing him with a fork. At that point, officers made contact with the stabber, who admitted to the forkin’ and told them the man had it coming. “I don’t see why he called the cops,” Walgenbach said. “He knows he deserved it.” She claims she attacked only after the man and his girlfriend tried to rape her. Walgenbach, whose BAC was reported to be .306, was transported to a detox unit before being carted off to jail. She’s been charged with second-degree assault with a dangerous weapon, domestic assault and fifth-degree assault. Walgenbach, who has prior convictions for domestic assault and disorderly conduct, is currently being held on $20,000 bond.…

FOND DU LAC, WI — A man was arrested and charged with domestic abuse after getting mad at his girlfriend and assaulting her with a hamburger. Shawn A. Posthuma, 24, told police he went all James Cagney on his woman after she refused to eat the food from McDonald’s he had purchased for her. His girlfriend said Posthuma threw fries at her so she threw some back at him. He retaliated by slamming a hamburger in her face and holding it there. But he wasn’t done. When his girlfriend’s sister tried to intervene, he threw her into a glass patio door. When his girlfriend tried to call police, he threw her to the ground and her cell phone across the room. Not quite finished with his tantrum, he head-butted his girlfriend in the face, causing a cut to her nose. Posthuma admitted he has anger management issues and needed help. He was charged with disorderly conduct, misdemeanor battery, disorderly conduct and felony intimidation of a victim. …

Cleveland, OH – Three Cleveland teens are standing before a judge in courtroom 3-D this morning, answering to charges they beat a man so badly last Wednesday that he was placed in intensive care. Two teens, both 18, were walking home from Max Hayes High School when they say the were assaulted by a group of eight boys ranging in age from 15 to 19, because they are an interracial couple. The group followed the couple making vulgar remarks and comments with one informing the girl, who is African American, “You’re cute but I’m gonna punch him in the face.” But it turned out that it was she who would initially get punched in the face. When her boyfriend, Jefferey Meadows Jr., stepped in to defend her, he was ruthlessly beaten for it. Nieghbors called 911, but the girl was able to walk her boyfriend to a realtive who then took him to the hospital. His injuries were so severe that he was life-flighted to the Level 1 Trauma Center at MetroHealth Medical Center.…

Evansville, IN — A toddler girl was seen in the hospital early Friday morning suffering from second- and third-degree burns to her face, neck and shoulders, and according to police, her mother’s boyfriend is responsible for the injuries. Authorities claim 28-year-old Kyle Hankins poured boiling water on the child’s face as she slept. The child’s mother, Krystal Lockridge, told police Kyle showed up at her apartment at about 10:00 Thursday evening – the couple spent about an hour together before Krystal fell asleep with her other two children. At about 2:00 a.m., she woke to the sound of 2-year-old Kayleigh screaming. Krystal said she found her daughter sitting in a chair in the living room with burns on her face. Kyle reportedly told her Kayleigh had peed the bed while she was sleeping and he decided to bathe her. He ran the tub, plopped her in it and left the bathroom, returning only after she started screaming. Investigators called bullshit on that nonsense almost immediately. According to the arrest affidavit, Kayleigh’s bed and pillow were wet; only one side of her face was burned; the burn patterns show that she was likely sucking her thumb when doused.…

NORTH FORT MYERS, Fla. — Zeke Smith was looking for a fight Monday night at the River’s Edge Mobile Home Park where he lives according to property manager Shirley Phillips. “Zeke was saying, well, I’m gonna own this place and I’m running this place. He was talking crazy and acting crazy, walking in circles.” Smith began harassing two men who chased him to the sidewalk trying to run him off. Mad, Smith told police he pulled a real estate sign out of the ground and threw it at one of the men who picked it back up and stabbed him in the chest with it. But the girlfriend of the accused says Smith was acting like an idiot and fell into the sign, stabbing himself. This account was also backed-up by Phillips who said Smith had hit the man with the sign, knocking him to the ground. The man was able to wrestle the sign away from Smith who charged again and ended up impaling himself on it. Either way, Smith was taken to the hospital where he is listed in serious condition suffering from a punctured lung.…

SALISBURY, Md.- A man has been arrested and charged with assaulting an elderly woman in the checkout line of a Maryland Walmart. On Oct 13th, police responded to an emergency room where a 70-year-old woman had been admitted after suffering injuries she says was inflicted by 24-year-old James Russell Crockett. Allegedly, the elderly woman went to move from one checkout lane to another and accidentally bumped into the cart of Crockett’s wife. The wifey became enraged and began yelling racial slurs when Crockett picked up the woman and put her on her own cart then proceeded to ram her cart, with her in it, into a counter several times before she fell out onto the floor. As she lay on the ground screaming for help, Crockett flipped her cart on top of her then went back to checking out his groceries with his wife. Crockett has now been charged with first- and second-degree assault, reckless endangerment, disturbing the peace, dangerous weapon with intent to injure and disorderly conduct. His wife, 22-year-old Virginia Elizabeth Crockett, was charged with disorderly conduct and disturbing the peace.…

LADDONIA, MO. –– I learned of this story from one of our members after she made a Facebook comment about it. After doing a little checking this morning, it looked like enough material for a front page post. The pastor of Laddonia Christian Church is facing first degree assault of a law enforcement officer charges following a property dispute. Police say they arrived at the church Friday night to find pastor Ryan Finley Price, 53,  pacing outside and holding a semi-automatic handgun. They found church member and law enforcement officer Noel Scott, 61, face down on the ground with serious neck and head injuries they say were caused by him being struck with a blunt object. Scott told police Price told him that if he moved, he’d kill him. Scott was life flighted to the university hospital in Columbia. Price was also charged with armed criminal action, felonious restraint and unlawful possession of a firearm. I couldn’t find any details into what the dispute was about so please, feel free to speculate.…

Muncie, IN – Police say that when 19-year-old Ethan Ogden’s girlfriend didn’t return home from her errand running within a reasonable time period, the little snot took his anger and frustration out on her 8-week-old infant. The child’s mother was out taking care of business and paying bills while Ogden was left home to care for the baby. Though he is not the child’s father, police say he was with the baby’s mother throughout her pregnancy and was present during delivery. Ogden admitted that he became frustrated when his girlfriend was gone too long and “lost control.” He reportedly threw the baby girl to the ground and stomped on her, causing a black eye and a severe break to her leg. When mom returned home, he told her the child had fallen out of her bouncy seat. He later told police that he wanted to hurt the baby, but didn’t want to seriously injure her because he loved her. There is no information on the child’s condition, but according to mom’s Facebook, baby girl will be released from the hospital tomorrow.…

Jose Taveras Is A Dirty Old Man

October 21, 2010 at 6:50 am by  

Providence, RI – Police arrested 66-year-old Jose Taveras and charged him with two counts of enticement of a child and one count of simple assault after he reportedly followed a couple of little girls into a grocery store, hugged ’em both and kissed one of them on the lips. *gags* The girls, ages 10 and 11, told police Taveras pulled up beside them Monday afternoon and offered them a ride. They said they tried to ignore him as they made their way to the market, but he followed. After the nasty incident inside the store, the girls fled to their grandmother’s apartment. As they were telling her what had happened, they saw Taveras enter the building. He later told police he was visiting a friend who just happened to live in that same building. The girls also told police that Taveras had tried to get them into his car on numerous occasions, even offering them cash to do so. As he was being arrested, Taveras told police he needed his blood-pressure medicine from his car.…

Orlando, Florida – Sorry for the lack of stories today, people. It’s kinda my day off and Jaded is hungover having connection issues. Luckily it seems as if everyone is playing nice as there are few interesting incidents to post about. Although I did find this one where a confrontation between a Disney bus driver and a passenger was captured on video. I know, nothing too terrible but the angry passenger says, “We have a baby. We’re supposed to be priority.” That statement reminded me of something I noticed during my recent trip to Orlando. Parents with small children like to stick them in strollers and use them as battering rams. No matter where we were at Spooky Empire’s Horror Convention, if there was a parent with a baby in a stroller, get the fuck out of the way because they will ram you. They will also act indignant if you do not immediately get out of their way, looking at you and then down at the drooling baby then back at you like you didn’t already see the frigging thing after they rammed it into the back of your knees.…