MOUNT VERNON, New York - I have no idea how I missed this horrific story. But I did. Calls started coming into 911 stating that a naked woman was walking down the street screaming. Some witnesses thought that she had a doll with her. As it turns out, the doll was her 5-month-old son. In front of bystanders, she raised the baby over her head and slammed him into the sidewalk in front of St. Ursula’s Roman Catholic Church. Twice. One witnessed said that she  tossed the baby into the street like he was a football. When police arrived, a Good Samaritan had already wrestled the infant away and handed him to Mount Vernon Police Commissioner, David Chong. He was rushed to Mount Vernon Hospital, and later transferred to the Westchester Medical Center trauma unit where he is still in critical condition. Brown was charged with first-degree assault and endangering the welfare of a child. She is currently in Valhalla’s county jail and on a suicide watch. [Read more...]

SPOKANE, Washington – Caroline Francis was sitting at a light after leaving the YMCA last week when a large van with three men pulled up beside her and asked her to roll down her window. The passenger began asking for directions to a particular street. She tried giving them instructions, but started getting suspicious when they kept asking her questions. Their true intent became apparent when the light turned green. That’s when the passenger leaned out of his window and poured a 20-ounce bottle full of piss in her face. “I know this is really gross but I thought it was water and then I could smell it and it was all over me and I was freaking out shaking,” Carolinecaroline reviews said. “It got all over me, in my eye, in my mouth, all over my car.” Um. GAG. [Read more...]

Miller County, MO – Meet Aaron Fisher, admitted baby raper. All hot and bothered after watching a porno last Wednesday, this monster decided to work out his sexual frustration on his 5-month-old baby girl. That baby girl is now listed in critical condition at the hospital, suffering from internal bleeding, a fractured skull, and several broken bones. According to court documents, the child showed signs of both physical and sexual abuse. He not only raped the child, he beat the shit out of her. In a statement given to the Miller County Sheriff’s Department on Oct. 29, Aaron described, in detail, exactly what he had done to the child. This guy needs to be lobotomized with a rusty spoon – asap. It is reported that Aaron, along with the mother of the infant and a 2-year-old child, were living in his mother’s home. His mother, however, recently fled the home and the state after Aaron allegedly assaulted her. OMFG. Why is this deranged pile of human excrement still breathing? Aaron Michael Fisher, 21, is being held without bond on two counts of sodomy. The infant and her 2-year-old sibling have been placed in protective custody while the investigation continues. [Read more...]

Langley, British Columbia – To the men in Langley – might I suggest adding a protective cup to your daily wardrobe? Seems there is a psycho bitch running loose up there who may find enjoyment in random peter punting. Anthony Clark, 22, was walking around Langley last month, just minding his own business, when a strange woman on the street approached him and kicked him in the nads. Just like that. Poor guy didn’t realize the severity of the blow to the acorns until later that night when he “noticed something was missing.” The demented stranger kicked him hard enough to send one of the crown jewels straight up into his abdomen. Clark visited a specialist in the hopes that the beloved bollock could be coaxed out of his gut to continue life in it’s rightful spot. No such luck. [Read more...]

Clayton County, Georgia A couple of teachers have found themselves in a bit of hot water.  I guess it’s not such a good idea to post a love letter to your boyfriend’s FacebookFacebook when he works in the same building as you…along with his girlfriend. But that’s what happened at Rex Mill Middle School. Ebony sent her man a letter, it was intercepted by Chaka, and all hell broke loose in the hallway Monday during school. They yelled, smacks were thrown about, and the 7th and 8th graders in that school got a quick lesson from their family and consumer science teacher on the fine art of expressing one’s self. The school authorities were not enthused and once the officers were brought in, the brawling teachers were promptly arrested. [Read more...]

SAVANNAH, Georgia – 22-year-old Scott Allen Elder and 24-year-old Brian Matison got into a series of escalating arguments over the phone and through text messages all because of a misdialed number. These exchanges led to the pair deciding to meet in an CVS parking lot at 2:30 a.m Tuesday to settle their differences. This meeting of the minds ended with Matison being taken to the hospital in serious condition after Elder shot him. As for Elder, he ended up with a damaged vehicle and a trip to Chatham County jail on a felony aggravated assault charge. Police are calling the incident senseless. “We don’t know what the circumstances are. What we do know is that it was just a mistaken phone call. The two men did not know each other prior to that and they allowed a text conversation to escalate to physical violence,” says SCMPD Spokesperson Veda Nichols. [Read more...]

Hanover, Virginia – Omar Abdelaal just turned 16 – now, he’s looking at 20-to-life. Omar is accused of attacking another teen with an axe, sloughing off the left side of the kids face. The victim, just 15, had to have his face sewn back together with about 120 stitches. The entire attack was captured on video surveillance at a frequent teen hangout called Tractor Supply, Co. According to police, two groups of teens were arguing in the parking lot when Omar and his friends walked away and entered the supply store – the victim and his friends weren’t far behind. At some point, Omar broke away from the entire group, grabbed an axe from a display, removed the protective cover, and attacked the other teen. On the surveillance video, the victim could be seen facing Omar with his hands at his sides when he was hit. [Read more...]

Rochester, New York – Peter McCabe has been a referee for more than 25 years and has never had anything happen to him like what happened to him after a playoff game with the Western New York Cougars. After a rowdy game that involved a fight and some players were ejected, the Cougars ended up losing the game by two points. After the end of the game, the winning team lined up to shake hands, but the Cougars did not. As the players were walking off the field, a player from the Cougars swung his helmet into McCabe’s face giving him a detached nose, a hairline fracture in his skull, a broke jaw and nearly every bone in his face fractured.Another referee who saw it happen says the player stood over McCabe and said, “Take that! Take that!” and then walked away. To make things worse, team members of the Cougars refused to hand over their cell phones so someone could call 911. [Read more...]

ESSEX, Maryland – An off-duty Baltimore police officer, Eric Michael Janik, 36, was taking his 9-year-old daughter through the haunted house attraction, The House of Screams, along with another police officer, Lisa Michelle Hinkley. When they reached the end of tour, they ran into Michael Brian Morrison, 32. An employee of the attraction who gives the paying customers one final scream dressed as Leatherface from The Texas Chainsaw MassacreThe Texas Chainsaw Massacre reviews films. After his act of cutting a girl in two, he chases after people with an unchained chainsaw as they exit the attraction. But when he approached Janik and his daughter, Janik pulled out a handgun and pointed it at Morrison’s chest. Morrison dropped the chainsaw and held up his hands. Janik then holstered the gun, stated “it’s alright, I’m a cop,“  and attempted to shake Morrison’s hand. Another employee called police. [Read more...]

IOWA CITY, Iowa – Don’t say that some of us have not been warning you guys for a long, long time. One of our field operatives was almost arrested after attempting to exterminate a zombie in Iowa City. The zombie was spotted inside a restaurant south of the University of Iowa campus. Our agent feared for the safety of the living public and attempted to incapacitate the zombie by punching it in the face. This is not standard procedure, as noted in our Zombie Survival Guide: Complete Protection from the Living DeadThe Zombie Survival Guide: Complete Protection from the Living Dead reviews, but the agent attempted to punch the zombie in the face a second time, breaking its nose. Our agent was able to flee with is life, while the zombie was last seen being transported to a “hospital” – or more likely the government facility it had escaped from. We will keep you informed of all the latest developments regarding the beginning of man’s destruction by the zombie horde. And agents, please read your handbooks. There are right ways and wrong ways to attack a zombie. This was the wrong way. [Read more...]

Maiden, North Carolina Aaron Burke’s wife left her home Monday evening to help a friend move some furniture when she realized she had forgotten her driver’s license at home. Upon her return an hour later, she walked into the house and into her bedroom closet to retrieve her purse when she noticed a light on in the adjacent room, her daughter’s clothes on the floor, and splashing sounds coming from the bathroom. Sounds fun, right? It wasn’t quite the playful bath time one might expect to find. She allegedly walked in on her disabled husband holding her 23-month-old daughter under water while she was struggling against his grip. [Read more...]

DEERFIELD BEACH, Fla – On Tuesday, 15-year-old Michael Brewer had skipped school and was visiting a friend outside the Lime Tree Apartments complex. As he sat by the pool, he was approached by five other teens who began yelling that he was a snitch and to “pour it on him“. When Brewer tried to walk away from the group, police said 15-year-old Denver Jarvis splashed him with a jar of rubbing alcohol and Jesus Mendez, 15, used a lighter to set him on fire. Brewer ended up jumping in the pool to extinguish the flames, but the damage had been done. He suffered second degree burns over up to 80 percent of his body and was airlifted to Jackson Memorial Hospital. All of this stemming from a dispute over $40. [Read more...]

Tulsa, OK – Have you ever had one of those days? The kind of day where everything and everyone just annoy the shit out of you? Have you ever been so annoyed and pissed off that you just wanna beat the hell out of someone with a harmonica? No? Am I the only one with that strange urge? Nope. Meet 52-year-old Decai Liu. He must suffer from intermittent harmonicidal urges as well. According to police, Liu’s roommate was preparing for work on SaturdaySaturday reviews when Liu barged into the bathroom and started whalin’ on him with a harmonica. When officers arrived at the home, they found the roommate bleeding from cuts to his head and face – he told police, “I don’t know what his problem was.” (Maybe it wasn’t the roommate he intended to injure, but the harmonica. I feel the same way about banjos – I see or hear one, I want to kick it). Anyway, to make matters worse, Liu put up a fight when it was time to get cuffed and headbutted an officer. Out came the pepper spray – down went Liu. On Thursday, Decai Liu was charged with assault with a dangerous weapon, assaulting an officer, and resisting arrest. Bail was set at $6,500. There is no word on the extent of the roommates injuries. Now, let the puns begin…  [Read more...]

Sheboygan, Wisconsin – I’m not sure how many of you watch COPS or not, but for those of you who do, it is a well known fact that police do not give a shit about your stage of dress (or undress) when they haul your ass to jail. If they decide to get your naked ass a pair of shorts or not is really depending on how big of an asshole you are, as well as the cop you asking to get them. Julia Laack, 36, found this out when she attempted to disrobe to keep cops from taking her to jail after she got busted for shoplifting beef jerky and a lighter from a gas station. But naked or not, JuliaJulia reviews was not going without a fight. [Read more...]