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Scottsdale, Arizona This whole investigation started at the end of May. Temperatures in Scottsdale, Arizona, on the average were around 93 degrees which was getting nice and warm. With all that heat comes the need to keep your plants and yard watered. Along with that watering comes maintenance, mowing, trimming…and if you don’t have time, it’s vogue to hire a landscaper. You know, cultivating beauty. And as many times as we’ve all enjoyed the *ahem* aesthetics on this page as well as the cries for brain bleach and a good eyeball cleansing, I doubt battery acid could help the poor landscaping dude that walked up on the Arizona man who had been dead in his hot tub for at least three days.…
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Wythe County, VA – After a long and boring day in the town of Taylorsville, North Carolina, Jerry Wayne and his lovely wife Lisa Church Damron must have looked at each other, smiled that sheepish grin, and immediately knew what they needed to do. Things like that happen when you’ve been with someone for a while, you just know what the other is thinking by the look in their eyes. It’s like a light bulb burns out in someone’s brain and the only other one to notice is the significant other who hears the “pop” and smells the faint burning. I was touched to read this story of the closeness of Jerry and Lisa – who decided to take to the highway because their 7 children were gone and they had nothing better to do. There were only a couple of things they needed for their journey, some liquor and that gal they just shot.…
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St. Paul, Minnesota Unless you live under a rock with no television, radio, get no newspapers, etc. you’ve heard about the “King of Pop’s” timely demise. (oops, damn typos) The media’s coverage of crying/fainting hoards of people flocking to and fro to get a glimpse of the glitterati browsing for the appropriate clothing to wear, or perhaps the brothers shopping for one white sequined glove to carry his final chariot, has been enough to make me want to break my TV. The talk of a memorial service at the Neverland Ranch brought that 4 syllable location back into the forefront and young children asking their parents, “What’s Neverland?” And if any parents were like Patricia Becht, they tried to give a sense of peace while plotting the murder of their children at that very location.…
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Treasure Island, Florida A place where those promoting tourism promise you a “quiet, laid back” atmosphere and the white sand beaches stretched along the Gulf Coast are truly lovely. There’s never a shortage of entertainment as bars and eateries along these resort towns are generally bustling with activities and live bands. One can find about anything they need in communities such as these. Tattoo parlors, surf and swimwear, souvenir shops on top of each other. Everything you need but sex toys. Last year in Southern Alabama, owners of these sex-toy stores were throwing a fit because their establishments were being shut down left and right. The store owners were adamant about the the health value of their products and were finding clever ways to justify their existence. As much as I realize customer testimonials are a huge part of promotion and advertisement, somehow I doubt they’ll be looking to Kimberly Calvert and her pink companion.…
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Patterson, NJ – “Palo Mayombe” is a form of black magic that’s viewed as the queen mother of everything evil. It’s origin is set back in the 15th Century in the Congo Basin of Central Africa. It appears as though Palo Mayombe is based on two pillars: The veneration of the spirits of ancestors and the belief in natural powers (Nature). Through all the research I did, I really couldn’t find anything that would make me fear this “religion” and a few things I ran across just seemed downright funny – like them selling “Do It Yourself spell kits” for $50 over the Internet. I know gambling is a problem for some, but a spell kit for it? So yeah, I found nothing really “black magic’ish” that would make me raise my eyebrows…except for these three people’s interpretation of the “religion” and the ritual they performed on this 7 year-old girl. …
Continue ReadingAbel and Denise Wolf Buried Daughter Once – Moved Her A Few Times
July 8, 2009 at 8:58 am by thinkgoat
Oklahoma City, OK This story is reminiscent of the darker writings by William Faulkner. When the news story came across the wire, shades of “As I Lay Dying” played out in my head. (If you haven’t, you must read that story.) It’s a tale of a family with a mother who lays down to die while her oldest son builds her coffin outside the bedroom window so she could approve each board used. And she does die, leaves one wish – to be buried in Missouri. Their journey begins from their home in Mississippi in a ass-drawn carriage…and it’s hot… buzzards following them the entire way because momma is now stinking to high heaven. Which is so very close to what the Wolfs must have smelled before they buried their 11 year-old daughter the first time.…
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Monticello, NY On Saturdays around the county, Walmart parking lots are buzzing with cars circling to get the closest space to one of the many entrances. People come crowding in to spend their hard earned money on the “Always Low Prices” but unfortunately Saturday, in Monticello, NY, shoppers arriving for the afternoon bargains were turned away – the store had unexpectedly closed for several hours. What a bummer for Cory Clarke, a father who had his two children for his first paternal visitation. He put his 7 month-old daughter Brook and 18 month-old son (?) Charley in a double stroller and trekked roughly 3 miles to the spend some quality time in Walmart with his children. One problem, after he finished with the checkout line, his load was approximately 17 pounds lighter, little Brook was gone.…
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Canton, Ohio Police made quick work of locking up a couple of thugs who wreaked havoc on a Canton family Thursday. In a city that had a reported 9 homicides in 2008, Thursday’s incident brought 2009 statistics up to 10 homicides thus far. Fortunately for all involved, the first alleged gunman, William Ferguson (21) turned himself into police early Saturday morning in Elria and the fine men/women in blue transported this ass back to Canton. Upon interviewing him, police gathered enough information to arrest Maki Ragland (20) at a relative’s home in Canton. One of the big questions is: Why shoot grandpa in the leg and how did it end up killing a two-year-old?…
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Fort Wayne, Indiana When we view many of the cops shows on TV, we start to become impervious to the many prostitution, DUI, and domestic violence busts being made. Every so often the viewers get a glimpse behind the scenes, when police departments plan a “sting” of some kind. It entails organization and a well vetted plan. The prostitution stings are basically the same, if you’ve seen one, you’ve seen them all – with the exception of the new fresh faces of skankiness. And if you are anything like me, “who would pay for THAT?” is uttered a few times. The drug busts always offer an element of excitement, though. One never knows what to expect when focusing on dealers. I imagine the Fort Wayne Vice and Narcotics Unit wondered the same thing when they set up surveillance on a well known radio personality and pastor.…
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Fort Wayne, Indiana I imagine it’s extremely difficult to be a conscientious DCS employee and manage to keep your ass out of jail. It must be a balancing act composed of restraint and resourcefulness. Those employees who are an attribute to their profession seems to go to any length to make a difference in children’s lives. The bad ones seem to lend a helping hand with destroying them. And as I sit here attempting to write up this story I have to wonder just how in the hell these DCS case workers kept from turning on Amanda Alvather and not beating the living shit right out of her for what she did to her children. …
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Worcester, MA This is a story of a father fighting for his right to bond with a son he hadn’t known for seven years. The father, Leslie Schuler, went through the court system a few months ago to obtain proof of paternity through a DNA test. A year prior to that, Leslie petitioned the courts for visitation rights. “I would like a chance to become the child’s father, not just a paycheck once a week.” Admirable. After 7 years of longing for a relationship with the fruit of his loin he got his chance to become more than a supplier of a few dollars a week and got Nathaniel Turner for the summer. So what happened within those few weeks that led to this 7 year-old succumbing to his injuries?…
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Axton, Virginia It’s after midnight on a Saturday, a time for all good college kids to be hitting their drinking prime or making their way back to their dorm room looking for the perfect opportunity to sneak their love for the evening into the comfort of their room. But for Timothy Carter, activities after midnight on Saturday were a bit more adventurous. Guided by the loving hand of his father, Timothy was lured home only to find daddy had flipped and that his basic survival instincts would be put to the test after his father turned the gun on him. …
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Columbus, Ohio – Authorities went on a scavenger hunt late last week after an assistant manager for the West bay Apartments called 911. “Could you please send a detective or homicide detective over?” they asked, “We believe we have body parts in our pond and in one of our dumpsters.” It didn’t take authorities long to set up orange traffic cones and little flags all around the pond and the building after finding the reports were true. One guy interviewed seem to be thoroughly disgusted at the spectacle or perhaps it was disgust at the revelation of what had actually occurred. And it didn’t take long before investigators ended up at the residence of Robert Knight. Armed with a search warrant and perhaps a bit of an appetite, one detective opened his freezer only to find the regular frozen groceries – ice, popsicles, a head, a couple arms – you know, the normal stuff.…
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Aiken, South Carolina Meet Erica. Her self-described Myspace entry states her interests are kids, butterflies, and shopping. Her favorite television shows are American Idol, CSI, General Hospital, Dragon Tales (PBS), and The Big Comfy Couch (ABC Kids). Newly married and cute as a button, why parents would have a problem choosing her as their children’s daycare provider is beyond me. But I’m thinking, after her stint in prison, she might be looking for a new career other than running a daycare. Who the fuck knew that children cried and screamed? I mean, it’s not like that in any of those shows she watched. Well CSI maybe, but it’s never more than a minute or so and it just shows things that happen to other people, not this sweet Southern Belle.…
Continue ReadingLance Ballinger’s Father’s Day Gift – Out of Jail and a Dead Daughter
June 28, 2009 at 4:27 am by thinkgoat
Onamia, Minnesota is about 32 miles SW of Brainerd, a name made famous for enough of us sick individuals who happened to enjoy the movie Fargo. Onamia has a population of about 850 people and hopefully will be a couple less by the time this story plays out in the courtroom. The participants are the quintessential features on the Dreamin’ Demon, the kind who fit the prerequisites: selfish baby abusing motherfuckers with the propensity for criminal stupidity. I’m of course speaking of Lance Ballinger (23) and Kelly Friend, once boyfriend/girlfriend. Right now Lance is in a whole heap of trouble and with crossed fingers, Kelly will soon learn what it’s like when a mother makes shitty decisions regarding her children.…
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Dallas, Texas Honestly, how many times have we jokingly threatened our children with “I’m going to hang you by your feet”? Better yet, how many times have our children bounced off the walls and we secretly entertained the same idea? Or plotted it out, complete with the story we’d tell Child and Family Services once someone ratted us out? For me, maybe only a couple of times regarding my children, several times over concerning my husband. But that’s a whole other story right there! To actually act on that impulse takes either great nerve, great stupidity, a chemical imbalance, or a nasty mix of the three. …
Continue ReadingFuneral Day for Barbara Johnson’s Daddy, “It was going to be me or him…”
June 26, 2009 at 5:21 am by thinkgoat
Carter County, MO - This here’s a story about love, betrayal, and bloodshed. The setting is Carter County, Missouri nestled in the Ozark foothills in the Southeastern part of the state. Census reports state a little over half of the residents there have at least graduated from High School. I’ve been through that area, it’s beautiful – “God’s” country. And the one thing that’s generally coupled with unspoiled land is unrefined inhabitants. By “unrefined” I mean hillbillies. The movie Deliverance could very well have been filmed in Carter County had Georgia been struck with some sort of plague. …
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Columbus, Ohio – Okay folks, a little something about me. I was raised in the emergency medical field and became licensed. Later in life I decided I’d step up the game and became a certified firefighter. If there’s one thing I don’t take lightly, it’s our pledge of service and the code of ethics. Nothing pisses me off more than hearing of some ass-wipe posing as “one of us”. I know one fuck-up does not ruin a profession’s reputation but I guarantee you, we don’t view it that way. And so it is David Santuomo, firefighter, who is the log I’m tossing into the blaze.…
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Great Falls, MT – Being from the Midwest means I’ve had to build a tolerance to the many jokes regarding the stereotypical redneck. Well, not so much a tolerance to the jokes but rather: the stereotypical redneck! Here, the mullet haircut is still the most requested $10 style in the “salons”. Busch and Bud are the beers of choice because, by God, this is Anheuser-Busch country. And what the hell is the favorite past time, you ask? NASCAR. (Nothing goes better with Busch products. Think I’m full of shit? Head to their website. “Site contains fishing, hunting, and NASCAR information”)…
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Galloway, NJ – I rarely tire of pure selfish acts. For some reason they astound me. No one has found the answer to the million dollar question: What the fuck were they thinking? And so as I read these stories, I often play their scene over in my head trying to catch a glimpse of their motives. What exactly is their reasoning? Why don’t they seem to think about consequence? How can one individual possess complete unadulterated stupidity? Meet 27 year old, Tracy Posner. Although I tried, I couldn’t manage to wrap my mind around this New Jersey girl’s actions. …
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