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Canadian Police Waiting On Jewel Thief To Pass Diamond He Swallowed
May 18, 2012 at 1:27 pm by Pazuzu
Windsor, Ontario - Ladies and gentleman, I would like to introduce you to every woman’s dream — a man that shits diamonds. Or one that’s about to, anyway.
According to Ontario police, 52-year-old Richard Matthews went to Precision Jewellers in Ontario and attempted to swap a real diamond with a fake one. When store employees confronted him over swapping out a $20,000 , 1.7 carat diamond with a fake he had brought along, he proceeded to gulp down all the evidence.
Matthews was arrested on a suspicion of theft charge and placed in a cell with no toilet. Whenever he has to take a dump, he has to do so in a bucket. Afterwards, a gloved technician must sift through Matthews’ nuggets in hopes of finding the really expensive one.
X-rays revealed that Matthews is concealing two fake diamonds in his intestines. The real diamond cannot be seen because it’s translucent. Police have been patiently waiting for Matthews to pass the gem for over a week and expect it complete its journey any day now.…
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Louisiana – A man made of every negative Southern stereotype has been arrested after police found him passed out in his car with his 8-year-old son driving.
Billie Joe Madden, 28, was intoxicated early Sunday morning, and sleepy to boot. Unfortunately he was in the process of traveling to Texas from Mississippi with his two young children.
Fearing it may be unsafe for him to attempt driving in this condition he enlisted the help of a designated driver…his 8-year-old son. (I have a feeling I just gave him way too much credit and he really just wanted to drool off his stupor)
Louisiana troopers were alerted by motorists calling and saying there appeared to be a child driving a truck down I-12 . Others were alarmed by the erratic driving, although reports state the kid was maintaining the 70mph speed limit which would make him a better driver than 50% of the ones on the road here in South FL. [85% percent of SC drivers here in NC - Morbid]
The boy pulled over when police turned on their lights and he was found unharmed along with his 4-year-old sister in the backseat.…
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