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Vancouver, WA — Benjamin Walker, 27, is being held on $1 million bail after he admitted to choking his 78-year-old grandmother to death as she slept.

Walker, who lived in his grandmother’s garage, was apparently  just hanging out drinking beer early Monday, and decided he’d had enough of the woman’s nagging — she repeatedly asked him to turn off the lights and maybe take shorter showers — and “decided her and his fates.”

He entered her bedroom as she slept Monday morning, and choked the life out of her. But, BUT, he wanted to make sure she was good and dead, so he slit her throat with a kitchen knife, too, he said.

Grandma didn’t go quietly… police say Walker had numerous scratches on his chin and mouth. Damn shame he didn’t have a kitchen knife sticking out of his jugular.

After washing his hands, Walker reportedly walked to the Washougal Police department and confessed to the murder.

In court Tuesday, Walker’s court-appointed attorney claimed Walker was “remorseful and sad” about his grandmother’s death. Hence, the suicide smock.

I know some of the older people can be quite an annoyance, but you really don’t have to go to such extremes. A handful of hard candy and Jeopardy on a loop and they settle down. Right, Morbid?

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