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Frackville, PA — George Beaver, 59, is in police custody for allegedly biting his wife’s face after she touched his bag of Utz Potato Chips.

Police were called to the Beaver’s home last week after receiving a report about domestic assault between George and his wife, Michelle.

When officers arrived on scene, Michelle reported that George was sitting in the living room watching television and that she just happened to pick up a bag of Utz Sour Cream and Onion rippled potato chips that had been sitting on the coffee table.

George apparently said something like, “leave the fucking chips alone.” (Could have been “goddamn chips”, too. Not positive which cuss word was used, so I’ll use my favorite).

Michelle did not leave the fucking chips alone. This angered the Beaver.

George reportedly grabbed Michelle by the face and bit her left cheek, just below the eye, tearing off a piece of skin and causing her to bleed.

George fled the home before officers arrived, prompting them to obtain a warrant for his arrest. He was captured soon after, and charged with simple assault and harassment. He was ordered held on $10,000 bail.

So tell me, are they that good?

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