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Laura ReidLOUISVILLE, KY – Police have arrested 49-year-old Laura Reid after she allegedly beat a disabled man with his metal cane because he did not believe in God.

Police say Reid was in the man’s home when she asked if he believed in Santa Claus God. When he replied that he did not, Reid became so angry at his heathen ass that she beat the poor guy with his metal cane until it broke.

Reid remained at the man’s home for three hours after beating God into him, during which time he could not leave due to his disabilities. When she finally left, she reportedly took the guy’s cell phone, keys, cash and a wallet.

After making sure the coast was clear, the man crawled to a nearby gas station for help. He was taken to the hospital where he was treated for a concussion, a broken arm, and injuries associated with getting one’s ass kicked.

Reid was arrested on Tuesday and charged with second degree assault, second degree robbery, and first degree unlawful imprisonment.

The man should count himself as lucky. The last time we reported on a Crazy Christian getting angry over someone’s belief in God, an Atheist was turned into a bullet-ridden shrine and left on a couch to rot.

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  • Perfect example of why religion is garbage these days. Believe what I believe or be beaten. It’s a very God like approach.

  • Klantucky, you never dissapoint me

  • Wtf is it these crazy bitches and killing for this reason lately…

  • Nasty biatch give her a couple of whacks for being horrible

  • And she robbed him too. I’m sure God is proud.

  • Psycho

  • Buffettgirl

    Because beating an elderly man and stealing from him is so “God-like”… what a cunt!

  • melb1970

    I think she forgot the : WWJD.. part…
    She remembered the crazy ass hat part though

  • aldenscott

    It’s OK if you do it for Jesus. /s

  • Seymourbutts2

    It was gods will.

  • Duncan Manwood

    I was once beaten within an inch of my life for having a micro-penis after claiming I was hung like Ron Jeremy’s horse.

  • LuvsHorror

    I would think being hung like a horse would be quite uncomfortable…

  • Ann Stone

    Sounds like Kaintuck. They do so love their superstitious nonsense. Poor old guy.

  • Ann Stone

    Ha! Never make a claim like that unless you can back it up, lol. I knew a man who was hung like an horse once. It was astounding.

  • Duncan Manwood

    As someone whose penis has been compared to a small clitoris, I would not know.

  • Imaginary friends: the reason behind most of the world’s problems… AND I’M POSTING THIS AGAIN! WOMEN EVERYWHERE NEED TO SEE THIS!

  • She must have prayed about this

  • Actually the bible does say to kill all non-believers, so does the koran.

  • But remember, he loves you.

  • What about cow bell?

  • …………..it’s going down….. lol…..seriously…….u name it….

  • Josh

    Hell, ron jeremy can suck his own unit without bending over, who were you trying to impress?

  • Seymourbutts2

    Classic Carlin.

  • Josh

    Could you hear the ocean after?

  • MissGuggle

    My thought exactly! Geez Louise, ladies! Do you need to get laid, OR WHAT? I’ve never read about such crazy (literally) for the Lord birches in my life! Honestly, girls, Jesus would NOT be impressed!

  • MissGuggle

    And, in turn, Christopher Walken.
    …I’d give it some serious thought for Christopher Walken.

  • MissGuggle

    “We’re on a mission from God.”
    (I took it a different angle.)

  • MissGuggle

    I would’ve wanted to see it (maaaaybe touch it real quick bc I’m weird like that), and then I would’ve turned and run for the hills, screaming the entire way! (You only have to go to the hospital via ambulance once for having your cervix hit a few times while having sex and it resulting in a ruptured cyst, but not knowing that’s what happened- you just are in a ball of pain, sweat pouring off you, everything turning gray… Next thing you know, you’re surrounded by paramedics… An AWESOME time is all I’m sayin.)

  • Because that’s what Jesus would do.

  • itsknotme

    This can happen, too, when a woman screams “OH GOD! OH GOD!” and you scream out her BFF’s name.

  • 1DireWolf

    She ought be charged with a hate crime as well as injury to a handicapped person. Of course, she is mentally handicapped herself.

  • Grant… Gee… nothing like showing a bit of love from god, right?

  • Well the Wildcats are having a off year

  • Sejanus

    So why was she there?
    Internet date?
    Hookers for Jesus?
    She has sex for money eyes.
    Wonder if she is any good?

    Frankly it makes sense a disabled person not believing in God.
    No one wants to think there is an entity out there that let them be fucked up just for cosmic shits and giggles.
    If it were me I would be pretty much skeptical too.

  • Dr Slaughter

    Hah! This had as much to do with God as this loony tune wanting to take advantage of a disabled man and rob him. Lock her up with the rest of the animals. Carlin was and always will be hilarious.

  • Dr Slaughter

    Brings new meaning to the term Italian Stallion, and of course an increased chance of a nasty groin pull XD

  • Jeffrey Mhaghnuis

    Exactly why Abrahamic Religions should be banned and it’s believers treated for mental illness.


    oh, the hypocrazy … where do we begin ? God is not amused.

  • Hayli

    Should have also picked up an attempted murder charge!
    If this is Christianity I want nothing to do w it! I have read the Bible twice, I’m not a “Christain” but I try to live my life to be the best person I can be. 90% of these so called “Christians” are fake!

  • That wasn’t a very Christian thing to do, now was it?

  • Sara

    A word to the wise: When you’re a vulnerable person alone with a fanatic who asks you if you believe in God, the answer is yes. It sucks, but if you want to live, lie your ass off. These crazy people WILL beat and/or murder you. And then rob you, apparently. Though I’m pretty sure the Bible explicitly states “Thou shalt not steal.” Maybe there’s another passage I missed that says it’s okay if you’re stealing from a non-believer. It’s a disjointed, inconsistent book, at best.

    This article reminds me of a situation I found myself in about 10 years ago. There was this lonely old lady who lived across the street that I’d often visit and keep company. She was a bit of a religious fanatic, but never seemed dangerous to me. It was a little annoying to me when go on and on about Jay-sus. (That’s how she’d say his name.) At that time in my life, I was an atheist and everyone knew it, including her, so she’d always try to convert me. I’d been taught to respect my elders, so I’d just smile and nod politely and never argue with her.

    Anyway, the last day I ever had any contact with her, she went over to her walker and pulled a gun out of the basket on the handlebars. She was talking about Jay-sus, as usual, but then she said that everyone needs to believe in Jay-sus, that it would be better for them to be dead than to not believe. She then sat down, pointed that gun at me and said, “Do you believe in Jay-sus?” Now, there are a lot of subleties in communication that I miss, but this was clear: my response would determine if I lived or died that day. At that moment, I hated God, Jesus, Christianity and her with all my being, but I nodded. She called me a good girl and continued to preach at me, waving that gun around the whole time, as well as speaking in tongues, which scares me. I was just grateful she didn’t have any spare rattlesnakes laying around! About three hours later, my husband missed me and came to get me. He says my skin was white as a sheet, my eyes looked owlish and I was shaking.

    A few months later, she fell, broke her hip and had to go to a nursing home. I probably should have gone to visit her–pretty sure they took her gun away–but I was rather mad at her and was certain I’d vomit if I heard about Jay-sus again. By the time I calmed down and forgave her, she’d been dead for a few years. I do hope she’s in Heaven, though, if there is a such a place. I don’t think she was mentally well.

  • Inferus

    Those Christian prosyletizers are getting more aggressive these days. Guess Radical Islam is giving them a run for their money.

  • CallMeMister

    It more general terms, the Satanic Bible says (paraphrasing): do what you want as long as it doesn’t interfere with others. This is one of the primary philosophies I live my life by.

  • David Richter

    Oh no doubt she needs to get laid. However, have you SEEN that woman? I wouldn’t care if I was the last man and she was the last woman and the fucking survival of the human species was at stake, I wouldn’t do her. I’d be like “Well, humanity, it’s been a hoot, see ya later.”

  • David Richter

    I laughed way too hard at that picture! 😀

  • NY_Mommy

    I’m sure her God totally backs up her actions.

  • Flik Rust

    christians. bless.

  • BrittBrittRoss

    This is what happens when you let Jehovah Witnesses in.

  • GracieW

    Really? Where is that.

  • 2 Chronicles Chapter 15 verses 12-13. And they entered into a covenant to seek the Lord God of their fathers with all their heart and with all their soul;

    That whosoever would not seek the Lord God of Israel should be put to death, whether small or great, whether man or woman.

  • Gayle

    Yeah, “Spare the rod and spoil the disabled guy.” I think I remember reading that somewhere. *eye roll* You vicious heifer. I hope your jail roots grow outta that bottle blonde whore hat on top of your head so fast MY head will spin.

  • staylow

    She should be executed via a 500lb bomb like the ISIS scum that do the same thing under the same sentiment. Religion continues to be the scourge of humanity in all its forms.

  • staylow

    Maybe you’ve seen this already but it’s quite entertaining. Makes me wonder if most of humanity has been cheering for the villain the whole time. Maybe Satan was merely trying to dispose a tyrant. http://dwindlinginunbelief.blogspot.com/2006/08/who-has-killed-more-satan-or-god.html?m=1

  • That one’s everywhere, and it’s it doesn’t include the flood.

  • link07

    My atheist friends have it easy. We just drink craft brews and talk about politics….

  • captaingrumpy

    Finally , a Christian that follows the rules of ISIS. He had the devil in him , get it out.

  • corbin56

    This poor guy took a cane to the head over an INVISIBLE MAN IN THE SKY. Let’s take a couple of minutes to see if ANY of this makes any sense…shall we??

  • Da Mac

    Now THAT’s a Bible thumper!

  • MissGuggle

    Oooh, don’t tease me. ???? haha!

  • MissGuggle

    You’ve seen his face right?
    He’s actually a well educated, intelligent man. Sometimes it just pays to pimp.????

  • Josh

    Run that one by my wife please….

  • MissGuggle

    I’m posting that shit up on my corkoard in my office: “sometimes it just pays to pimp.” I wonder how the college kids will like it…

  • MissGuggle

    Don’t you think your wife will agree? Haha! Yeah, the hubs won’t either.

  • Josh

    Ask your wife how my kids are doing is my favorite.

  • ed

    “Spare the Rod…and Spoil the Child”….I say beat the shit out of him!

  • rarely

    disabled , all fucked up from the jesus freak , crawls his way to a gas station all on his own… this dude deserves an atheist gold fucking medal – shit he might be the second coming with all that torture and crawling