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The student waits to be rescued from the giant vagina sculptureTübingen, Germany — How many firefighters does it take to rescue a dumb American from a giant, 32-ton vagina? Go ahead, think on that for a minute…. we’ll wait. 

If you answered 22, you are correct. No, you don’t win shit.

The unidentified student apparently tried to scale the piece, called “Chacán-Pi,” because social media (Instagram, Twitter, Facebook, etc) makes people go to great lengths to get a love/tweet/like-worthy picture. Anyways, he slipped and fell. In. And got really stuck. Click right here for the full picture, pervs. I dunno… I think he looks kinda happy in there.

Enter the 22 firefighters. Giggity. One can only imagine the sheer number of YOUR MOM jokes that rippled through the firehouse after they received the call about a person trapped in a stone vulva.

Authorities say the unidentified idiot was soon safely “delivered by hand” and “without the application of tools,” and the vagina was left undamaged. No word on what they used for lube, but I’m just gonna go ahead and imagine it was the spit of 22 annoyed German firefighters.

According to the Mayor of Tübingen, he just can’t grasp how/why the whole thing even happened.

“Even when considering the most extreme adolescent fantasies. To reward such a masterly achievement with the use of 22 firefighters almost pains my soul.”

It makes my soul giggle.

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