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Cara ClaffyAlbuquerque, NM — Cara Claffy, 35, is being held at the Bernalillo County jail, charged with domestic violence and aggravated battery of a family member, after allegedly knocking her mother upside the head with a vibrator.

60-year-old Sheryl Claffy called police Sunday to report that her spawn struck her on the head with the device, leaving her bloodied, and was attempting to leave the residence they shared.

Mom told police she was just sitting there watching tv, when an argument between herself and her daughter erupted. It was then, she said, that Cara grabbed the electric vibrator and whacked her in the dome.

She pointed out a pickup truck sitting nearby, and informed officers that her daughter was inside. She wasn’t. The alleged weapon, however, was. An officer retrieved the vibrator from the floor of the vehicle. A detailed description of the device has not been made available.

Cara was apprehended after exiting a nearby home. She told officers she argued with her mother, but she didn’t harm the woman. In fact, Cara said, the old lady just came out of a room, all bloody and stuff, and informed her that she had hit herself in the head with the vibrator.

Cara was ordered held on $3,500 bond. Her priors include domestic violence and possession of narcotics.

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  • Death2Jesus

    Stupid bitch.

  • sprevilgenius

    Death2Jesus! I love the name

  • Jycorro

    Picked up a DV charge but not a sexual assault?!?

  • mean birch

    Takes dick slapping to a whole new level..

  • mean birch

    But I thought he all ready died….

  • Vindictive

    I’ve been contemplating starting a Sex Toy Rental shop. It’s kind of a niche market.

  • Melissa Stopka

    Of all things she uses a vibrator. Interesting choice.

  • Duncan Manwood

    Coincidentally, I’m in the process of writing a vibrator manual and the last step actually *is* to hit your mother in the head with it. Not sure how Cara got a pre-release copy.

  • JohnQknowitall

    So the two women were just sitting around watching television and started to argue. The daughter picked up the dildo that just happened to laying on the coffee table and smacked her mother on the head with it. I am stuck on a mother and adult child sitting in a room with a dildo just laying around. My family is so prudish.

  • Vesper B

    I want a photograph of said vibrator. While I know there are large vibrators, I’m wondering if a dildo wouldn’t have made for a better weapon.
    /used to work at an adult video shop

  • Bob Saccamanno

    Mom and daughter must share it, it replaces the man of the house , I suppose. I wonder if domestic violence should also be charged on behalf of the vibrater.

  • Jessie

    Have you seen the Magic Wand by Hitachi? It plugs into the wall (AC) and is humongous. Definitely a good weapon if you need it.

  • Jessie

    A 35 year old waste of space living with her mom, kudos Cara! Great way to thank her for the gift of life.

  • CT

    Why would they have a vibrator at hand while watching TV? People, you are not paying attention to the real issues.

  • Vincents_Sin

    You mean you don’t get that sudden urge to get off while watching TV? >_> <_<

  • CT

    I tend to watch the ID channel – that pretty much kills most desires – unless you want to learn how to kill your spouse.

  • thebossessecretary

    I’ve owned a lot of sex toys, but never one big enough to “assault” someone with. To whack the hell out of a person, it’s gotta be at least a foot long. Damn, woman, and I’ve given natural birth to three huge babies. Here I was thinking a six inch vibrator was too big.

  • Texas Ranger

    I’m not positive, but I am pretty sure that’s not how you use one of them vibrator things.

  • Xannie

    The family that whacks off together doesn’t stay together? Huh.

  • Buffettgirl

    I bet it all started with “No MOM! I can’t take the trash out right now!” and went from there…

  • Buffettgirl

    They’re still marketing those things as “back massagers” eh? ;-P

  • Vincents_Sin

    To be fair, there are those that probably get their jimmies rustled by some of the content on ID.

  • Buffettgirl

    Ewww! Just ewww! That would be one those tools that just shouldn’t be shared with Mom, EVER! ;)

  • Vincents_Sin

    I’m gonna go with “Can we turn on the game shows now?” “NO!” *whack*

  • Nurse_M_Ratched

    I bet it was “The Rabbit”

  • Buffettgirl

    You don’t? ;-P

  • Buffettgirl

    “I’ll take Humongous Vibrators for $1000.00 Alex”

  • Vincents_Sin

    “Anal Bum Cover for $400, Trebek!” “That’s ‘An Album Cover,’ Mr. Connery…”

  • http://www.dreamindemon.com/ Athena

    I’m a big fan of multipurpose items, and I’m a little disappointed now that I don’t own a vibrator that could bloody someone.

    The last one I bought is really sleek, German-engineered; aesthetically, it reminded me of Eva from Wall-E when I first saw it. But it’s covered in a silicone that, texturally, kind of mimics really nice microfiber, and it’s very lightweight, so I’m afraid it wouldn’t bloody a housefly.

    It does sort of resemble a very stylish remote, maybe for a stereo. I considered, when it was still brand new, leaving it out by the remotes to see who tried to use it. But I’m weird about germs, so I quashed that idea rather quickly.

  • http://www.dreamindemon.com Count Rackula

    Perhaps it was the dildo from Se7en??

  • thebossessecretary

    I think you should have left it out by the remotes. Just to laugh your ass off at the result.

  • newstarshipsmell

    Let’s not joke around on this one. This is no claffing matter.

  • firstofthefallen

    This seems like a story that should be coming out of Florida.

  • JohnQknowitall

    There’s a thought, but what if the daughter had just come back from dumpster diving and the dildo was one of the treasures. Adds an extra note of disgust don’t you think?

  • Scrappy

    I was thinking…poor mom, it’s been so long since she’s been, uhm, penetrated, that she forgot how to use it and accidentally smashed herself in the head?

  • Vesper B

    They were for a while. Not sure about now. Eye opening job, let me tell you. ;)

  • Vesper B

    Oh, Jessie! You nearly had me googling the name of the instrument, but I remembered I was at work! Bad Jessie!! ;)

    I’ll check it out when I get home. Thanks for the rec!

  • Buffettgirl

    I think it would be awesome, at least for a while… ;-P

  • David Baldwin

    IT ALMOST KNOCKED HER COCK EYED

  • Missy B Love

    Weird I never seen dildos as a common household item that you leave out for all the world to see. Man, I gotta add dildos to my list of “modern day household items”

  • Jessie

    Funny story: the first time I bought one (yes I am on my second) ten years ago I was at work. I know. Stupid. Then, for some reason I printed the receipt in a very public hallway. Let’s just say I totally forgot to pickup the receipt for my Hitachi Magic Wand. A very quiet, older Republican gentleman came in two hours after I printed and says, “Jessie I found this receipt for a back massager on the printer” and as he is staring at it his face gets really really red. As did mine. I avoided eye contact with him for two years after that.

  • Dre Mosley

    Straight cold cocked. And it left her “bloodied?” Hell was this vibrator made of?

  • thebossessecretary

    My husband used to buy me sex toys. I was totally horrified by what he came home with. It all ended when I told him that we were going to try them out on him first.

  • rarey4

    Funniest story here ever.

  • Sejanus

    Musta been one of those Toshiba GashBlaster 9000’s

  • Vindictive

    A gas powered ass hammer would really do the job.

  • CT

    Its stupidacity, I tell you.

  • Vesper B

    …awkward…
    I used to see college professors come in. They’d see me and get the frak out. It was hilarious.

  • Vesper B

    It was an interesting experience to say the least. I learned a lot about different…fetishes. There are some images I would love to remove from my memory, though.

  • Buffettgirl

    Like the couple that walks in weighing about 400 lbs each and wants to watch a video on anal fun? ;-) (This might have been addressed to you and Jessie, I’m not sure!)

  • Floppypuss

    One time, I got so wasted drunk, that I went to masterbate and thoight i had it in my pussy, but was really ramming it in my ass. LoL when I woke up, I realized that I had torn my asshole real bad so when I went to the doctor he looked at my gaping asshole and found that I had actually grabbed the cat instead of my Soldotna and I was like, how do u know that, and he was like, because its still lodged up your ass. And I was like LOL OMG ma’bad LOL and the doc made a funny to cheer me up he was like, right idea, wrong pussy…

  • mrskailuakona

    I’m not judging UNTIL Mahi finds out WHO’s vibrator it is was right? I mean the weapon if it was a gun then the police goes to the owner of the gun so the mystery hasn’t been solved! In your 20’s a vibrator is normal of course maybe at 35 the daughter without a real dick in sight decided to get one or the mother caught her in the act. There’s a REASON why your kids should fly the coop at adulthood so this is an example of WHY you place wings then toss them out the window to fly! At 35 take your vibrator and rent your apt. or a motel room for the night! That must’ve been one HARD vibrator to make men JEALOUS ‘cos most are soft silicone like human flesh ones!

  • Luvya Nunya

    Sex Toy Rental?? As in use and return for someone else to use and return….Gross!!

  • Lena60

    Time to kick her to the curb mom.

  • Lena60

    That would have been funny.

  • Vindictive

    I said, it’s a niche market.
    Of course I’d have wash before returning policy. Like the old ‘please be kind and rewind’

  • http://www.pamelahazelton.com Pamela Hazelton

    Vibrators don’t kill people…