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Laura CunliffeHoyland, England — A 23-year-old woman has pleaded guilty to charges of animal cruelty after nuking her kitten in a microwave for 5 minutes because the critter attacked her pet goldfish.

Officials claim an angered Laura Cunliffe tossed the four-month-old Mowgli in the microwave after the kitten attacked the fish, and set it to cook. She apparently misjudged the time needed to fully cook a kitty — poor Mowgli was still alive when she pulled her out.

“The kitten was in a distressed state when Miss Cunliffe took it out of the oven. She took the animals to a relative’s home,” said Brian Orsborn, prosecuter for the RSPCA. “The kitten could not get its breath and died about ninety minutes later. Miss Cunliffe made arrangements for the body of the kitten to be taken away to be buried.”

“In the 13 years I have been in the job I have never dealt with a case like this before,” said Lynsey Harris, RSPCA deputy chief inspector. “It is particularly horrendous because of the period of suffering for the kitten which would have been awful.”

Cunliffe, who’d had the kitten since it was just a few weeks old, admitted to zapping it. She will be sentenced next month on a charge of causing unnecessary suffering to an animal.

Cunliffe’s attorney claims she suffers from psychosis and depression and has been sectioned under mental health legislation several times.

A warning for those who may feel the need to click the source link — there are a couple of somewhat graphic pictures included with the article.

Oh, and no word on whatever became of the poor goldfish.

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Comments


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  • CD

    What a fitting last name she has.

  • newstarshipsmell

    Warnings? We don’t need no stinkin’ warnings!

  • t0ofIy

    we’d all be better off if people like this were dead

  • glitterpuss

    *sigh* Fucking horrible. I really wish they’d nuke this bitch so she can feel what it’s like

  • Jus Dewit

    I haven’t the guts to click the link and view those photos, but I can tell you I’d have no problem gutting that bitch and feeding her to all the little fishes.

  • Wolf_of_Mars

    Save the fish, flush the bitch.

  • JohnQknowitall

    We execute people in horrible ways and there is very little compassion.

  • Vfl

    Stupid bitch doesn’t deserve to live. Throw this garbage human waste in a oven. Idgaf if you are depressed or have some type of mental illness, you are better off fucking dead for harming a defenseless animal. How i wish society could be given a choice on how to get rid of these type of dipshits.

  • save_tonight

    Field trip to find this piece of trash and TV dinner her ass!

  • sweekymom

    In her case, my horrible way would be a garrotte. Over the course of about 90 minutes. And I hate that I feel that way.

  • Xannie

    Godfuckingdamnit. Fuck this cunt!
    Poor sweet kitty.

  • Chris Willis

    While we all agree there is something wrong with this woman. The biggest thing wrong with her is she took the kitten somewhere after the cat failed to die in the microwave.

  • salepo

    When I first saw it I actually thought it said cuntliffe

  • Texas Ranger

    Me too…is that sexist?

  • Texas Ranger

    Yeah, but some of them deserved it.

  • Texas Ranger

    Is she wearing 2 bras? Pink bra then a Union Jack bra? That is crazy right there.

  • Aussie Sabbath

    So first she claimed the kitten attacked her goldfish, now she’s claiming she has depression and psychosis? Yeah, nah, the lying bitch needs her tongue ripped out before she can conjure up more bullshit to save her sorry cunt. And Cunt-life needs a hysterectomy via her nostrils, because she will do this to a baby if some unfortunate sod happens to impregnate her.
    RIP Mowgli :’(

  • JohnQknowitall

    Like the cat killing a defenseless fish minding its own wittle business?

  • Aussie Sabbath

    Cunt-life.
    No more life for this cunt, though.

  • BehemothII

    One question Ms. Jaded how long does it take to nuke a kitten?

  • 1DireWolf

    Maybe she should spend a couple of minutes in an industrial-size microwave to better understand what she did, and put the goddamned fish in with her.

  • Eyam Ova-Urazis

    I can read about people getting killed and it usually doesn’t bother me much unless they’re kids. This makes me sick. Animals are innocent, and people are capable of pure evil. It’d be great if we could give her a punishment that fit the crime: Nuke the bitch.

  • LuvsHorror

    I feel sick. Unbelievable. What a heartless bitch. Hope she never has kids.

  • starry1

    That’s kinda whst cats do,

  • rarey4

    Don’t click.

  • Aussie Sabbath

    She’ll microwave them too if they play up.

  • salepo

    Nope just fitting lol

  • Cat

    I did and should not have.

  • rarey4

    I warned you weirdo.

    take it from a former gore hound when someone tells you that about a photo take their word for it.

    No really when you end up in that part of the internet it’s time to turn off the computer, find a human, and help them with something.

  • Jessie

    I love the picture of this busted-ass British cunt licker. Fugly bitch. I am utterly horrified and depressed by this story.

  • JohnQknowitall

    :

  • Jus Dewit

    I won’t; jus can’t dewit…

  • rarey4

    good kitty.

  • Vincents_Sin

    She set the timer for popcorn, not cat-tle corn…

    Apologies to those who frowned at that joke, but it’s my way of dealing with the twisted society we live in today. Too many stories showing up that end up making you mad or depressed, so I try to give myself some humor to lighten the blow.

  • http://www.truecrimereport.com CallMeMister

    Over a fucking GOLDFISH?!?! Seriously? It’d take at least a Haddock fish fry for me to get that worked up.

  • Buffettgirl

    Because pink and red don’t go together? ;)

  • Buffettgirl

    Hey, Crazy-Cunt, it’s a CAT, that’s kind of it’s JOB you worthless piece of shit! How fucking important is a goldfish anyway? Here, I have $4.00, go get another one, name it the same fucking thing and move on with life. Fuck I hate people sometimes…

  • Vesper B

    Aussie, I love your ideas. I would like to subscribe to your newsletter. ;D

    I was grooming the dogs this weekend and one of them snapped at me during the very delicate “wee-wee” grooming. I never in my life thought of sticking him in the microwave or in the grill (which would have worked as the DH was grilling for dinner). Am now actively finding ways to muzzle him for short periods of time so I can finish the grooming. I feel badly using a muzzle, but I don’t want him to bite me. :/

  • Mydnight Blackthorne

    oh the things i would do to this sick bitch! i cried at the thought of that kitten suffering after it was pulled out of the microwave…just sick!

  • Aussie Sabbath

    We need to put her in that industrial pressure cooker that the tuna factory worker died in.

  • CatAtonic99

    I always feel like those that abuse & torture animals should be punished in a similar fashion. I have way more empathy for animals & children than I have for humans in general. Animals & children are just too helpless in my mind.

  • CatAtonic99

    I only noticed the Union Jack top. Now I’m gonna have to go take a closer look!

  • CatAtonic99

    Exactly my thoughts! I figure if people are capable of killing innocent animals then they’re definitely capable of much more evil. I can read stories & see images of human killings all day long but there’s no way I’m clicking on the links to this. Just reading this story makes me physically ill.

  • CatAtonic99

    I went from smile to giggle and then to frown. Horrible but funny.

  • Stacey Yvonne Smola

    stupid beyond belief

  • Robin Renea Tison

    F#@$! Idiot I wanna slap her damn dumb face off..Cats eat fish, they act on instinct, You damn whore! Humans should know better,but you are a brainless piece of crap!

  • Sarah L4d

    i love me some kittehs, i can’t even bring myself to read this…haha. How messed is that? I can read all the people on people shit that gets put on here, but putting a kitteh in the microwave?! Nope. Not doing it.

  • Stanley_Ipkiss

    She could have just got rid of the cat if she loved her fucking fish that much. I hate my goldfish..got them years ago for my daughter thinking they would die off reasonably quickly but no such luck. Need me a cat now.

  • Stanley_Ipkiss

    Il do it..im a lot closer, its just a quick ferry trip for me.

  • Heather_Habilatory

    psyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyychooooooo.

  • Carrie Burton

    what a fucking bitch…. that is all.

  • Lena60

    Leave it to you to notice her bra and tatas in a situation like this.

  • Lena60

    Poor little kitten, and I am not going to click the picture links….no thank you.I would like to kick this cunt in her kitty. :(

  • Nathan Stegner

    What a piece of worthless dog shit!

  • Just Me

    I don’t give two shits what is wrong with this bitch. I would LOVE to see her microwaved. She deserves to ROT.

  • Just Me

    Count me in!

  • Lori Lynn Abell

    Can we nuke cuntliffe?? Please, can we?? Can we please?? Huh?? Huh?? Can we Pleeeeaaaasssssssse??

  • djariella

    Heartbreaking and sickening. I saw the pictures of this poor little guy and can’t imagine the suffering he went through being cooked alive. My cat was sitting with me as I read this article and gave him some extra hugs. He will get a nice can of cat food and some treats tonight with some catnip for his nightcap. That is what this cruel broad should be giving Mowgli.

    If possible please don’t view the pics. I googled her name and had seen them when her name is pulled up.

  • Aussie Sabbath

    I accidentally saw them shared on FB. Absolutely terrifying that this evil freak had been allowed to have animals and allowed to live among society.

  • Aussie Sabbath

    Yes, we can. Then we can squash her with a giant potato masher afterwards!

  • thebossessecretary

    I can’t believe the cat was alive when she yanked it out of the microwave.

  • djariella

    She should not be allowed to have pets or microwaves and never be allowed to breed as well. I’d like to see this woman be put in as much equal time to her weight as to the kitten’s weight. If the kitten weighs maybe 3-4lbs and put in the microwave at 5 minutes. She probably weighs around 120lbs give so a good 2hr+ nuking for her. I’d also be satisfied if she were in an electric chair too.

  • http://www.pamelahazelton.com Pamela Hazelton

    Like a moron, I clicked the link. Wish I could unsee it.

  • Brian Swezey

    I saved a blind kitten that lived around the dumpsters ,best thing I have done and I donot care for cats but she is so smart and funny.THIS BITCH SHOULD FILL IN THE BLANK

  • Cat

    yep I am a wierdo and a fellow gore hound as you so succinctly put it. I am a paramedic who once rolled up on a call with colleagues in Fredonia/Forestville NY area, picture the scene if you will. A windy spring day. A car that hit the rear end of a milk truck. 14 year old driver, father as passenger. The kid had hit the brakes so hard his feet had gone through the floor and were red smears on the asphalt for damn near 100 feet leading to the car itself. He had gone through the windshield and back into the car, essentially twice. The chief from the other company thought the kid was alive, the wind was carrying his head back and forth and it looked like he was nodding. The chief when he realized the kid was indeed dead from the carotid arterial severing lost his lunch on the kid’s lap. The father had eye avulsions, a complete scalp removal and partial decapitation from a seatbelt. I was eating when we rolled up and did not lose lunch.
    My husband and I clean houses after the dead have laid in there for days sometimes, the family members want personal effects.
    Man’s inhumanity to companion animals always saddens me.
    I read this article before I read comments, which is the normal way to do things. You calling me a weirdo is rather like the pot calling the kettle black.

  • rarey4

    I scan read that.

    ” rather like the pot calling the kettle black. that’s the joke”

    Yep, that’s the joke.

  • Laura_RT

    Wow… that comment should have come with a warning label… I maybe still would have read it, but I would have had only myself to blame… **shudders**

  • Kelly Coyne

    Rot in hell bitch and why don’t we do the same to you

  • Aussie Sabbath

    As much as my animals have annoyed me e.g. my cat pisses on clothing left on the floor, the rabbit eats shoes, the rat bit me when I tried to feed her – it never occurred to me to inflict any sort of physical harm on them. Maybe it’s because I was wired the right way and I actually feel empathy towards animals (other people, not so much)
    Seriously this cunt needs to flash-fried. Her brain has been wrong from the time she was born and she cannot be fixed.

  • Aussie Sabbath

    We should use her to test out cosmetics, medicines and other chemicals.
    I’m curious as to what would happen if she was forced to eat burning magnesium.

  • Leasha

    Cunt* Microwaved Kitten For 5 Minutes After It Attacked Her Pet Goldfish

    That bitch is NOT a woman. Does not even come close to the title. Also gonna throw in that her justification for it is bullshit; she’s a sick fuck and probably enjoyed the suffering of others. It just doesn’t make sense she loved that goldfish soooo much she murdered her cat for being a CAT and going after it. Did the fish die? If so, tough shit, flush it and get another one. Nasty vile piece of garbage.

  • CatAtonic99

    Fabulous idea! I like the way you think.

  • mkryan1

    A fitting punishment for this chick would be for me to shove my shalaylee in her ass for 5 minutes…………..WITHOUT LUBE!!! I would only do it if it would help out the community, of coarse.

  • Michele Vernet

    I totally agree!

  • Tomspy77

    I need a giant microwave…the fact the poor thing lived after that abuse pisses me off!

  • Lori Lynn Abell

    YAY!!!!!!

  • Sejanus

    Cunt life, cunt lips, cunt cliff whatever the cunts name is needs to be turned into catfood or fertilizer.

  • Patrick O’Brien

    I hope someone kicks the shit out of her. Ugly lunatic.