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downloadBrookfield, MA — A 24-year-old man has been accused of kicking his wife and attempting to kill her cat after apparently throwing a gigantic shit fit over the $1 freezer bags the woman bought Monday.

No word on what, exactly, it was about the freezer bags that pissed off Kwadwo Amoafo Amaniampong, but after the wife showed up with ‘em, he reportedly tossed tossed the bags onto a neighbor’s roof and kicked the woman.

After Amania… fuck that finger twisting name. After Mr. A calmed down a bit, the wife apparently approached him with the idea of a separation. Gee.. I wonder why. This did not please Mr. A, and meltdown #2 was soon in progress.

This time, police say, Mr. A’s rage was directed at his wife’s cat, which he choked and threw against a door. When the woman attempted to retrieve the pussy from underneath a couch, the man grabbed hold of a butcher knife and tried to stab the critter. The woman was eventually able to corral both of her cats and leave the house. She called police after her husband left for work, where he was arrested a short time later and charged with assault and battery and animal cruelty.

Because of the serious allegations against Mr. A, including a text to his wife in which he warned her that she does not want to see his “other side,” the District Attorney asked that bail be set at $500. He would have requested a dangerousness hearing, he said, but Mr. A’s wife felt comfortable with a restraining order.

The defense attorney stated that Mr. A has been having a rough time — he and the wife were recently robbed, leaving him without his wallet, credit cards or laptop. All he could come up with for bail was the $250 a friend a put up on his behalf. The judge granted that request, ordering Mr. A to steer clear of the wife and animals.

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  • Laura_RT

    “Bitch, I said GALLON sized, not quart.”

  • Taxidermi

    DAMMIT they were buy 1 get one free NEXT DOOR

  • CT

    WAIT, where can you buy freezer bags for a dollar? This is the most important part of this story.

  • t3chsupp0rt

    Dollar store :P

  • CT

    We don’t have “real” dollar stores here – we have some knock off shit that charges more than a dollar. People, it’s not a dollar store if pretty much everything costs $2 or more.

  • joel

    The bitch probably bought the twist tie bags instead of the zip lock bags

  • Eliza Berntsen

    It’s a dollar store for those that never did pass their maths.

  • thebossessecretary

    I have had shit fits over much less than dollar store bags. Because I’m kind of a bitch. Sorry, honey.
    Can I make it up to you with a blow job?

  • link07

    No I’m killing your cats

  • thebossessecretary

    You know what your dog says to your cat when they’re just sitting around? “You know why they don’t put a leash on you? Because they WANT you to get LOST.”

  • t3chsupp0rt

    Our dollar stores just make sure that everything they sell is worth far less than a dollar. So those dollar store bags are going to be made of about half the plastic as any other bag of that type, and the box will have about half as many as any other box of that size.

    It’s quite a racket.

  • Vesper B

    $500?? That’s it? I don’t care what kind of shit the man was going through. We all go through shit: we’ve all had stuff stolen, had no money, no cards, whatever. That doesn’t give us the right to go nuts and beat our significant others and a cat. And, I wouldn’t feel secure with a simple piece of paper telling pussy beater over there to stay away.

  • Buffettgirl

    I wonder if they were the big ones, you know, the kind you can fit over this fucker’s head and seal? Just curious…

  • Wolf_of_Mars

    Thought provoking & FUNNY as Hell!

  • Buffettgirl

    Not bad on a whole 40 minutes of sleep eh? ;-)

  • JohnQknowitall

    NO WONDER HE WAS PISSED!!! He knew those bags cost a lot of money… he just didn’t know that the cost involved legal bills.

  • JohnQknowitall

    Well it looks like the man of your dreams may soon be back on the market!!!

  • JohnQknowitall

    For a dollar? Do you really think he is that unreasonable? ;)

  • JohnQknowitall

    I don’t think so. She didn’t have to go to the hospital.

  • mean birch

    But are they the zipper kind?

  • mean birch

    I’m surprised texas ranger didn’t reply to this comment

  • mean birch

    That’s funny shit right there

  • Stormclouds

    … goodbye Mr A.

  • Delaney3030

    Sold

  • Delaney3030

    Surprised, or pleased? Haha Jk tr

  • Zibarro aka Kryssa

    Bullshit!
    A blow job makes everything better! ;)

  • Andrea Pizzuto

    I will get all kinds of pissed when there’s no Ziploc. DAMNIT!

  • Lena60

    I hope they are the gallon size so she can smother the prick with them in his sleep.

  • Lena60

    Thats not true, I never tell the cat that :P

  • keepalow

    Hows the cat??