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Krystle HarrisonBradenton, FL – According to police, when 19-year-old Krystle Harrison’s live-in boyfriend refused to have sex with her, she bit his dick in retaliation.

According to the police report, Harrison and her boyfriend, 24-year-old Jeffrey Wilkinson, were in bed when Harrison got horny and began touching on Wilkinson.

But Wilkinson had no desire to give his dog a bone and told her several times that he did not want to have sex. When he turned away from Harrison, that’s when he said she grabbed him and “bit his penis.”

Aftr getting up and walking out of the home the couple shares with their infant son, Harrison followed and allegedly slapped Wilkinson in the face before spitting in it.

Deputies noted Wilkinson had some minor scratches to his chest but he declined medical treatment for that or his bit penis. He also declined signing a sworn affidavit about the incident, telling police he did not want to press charges against his girlfriend.

Regardless, the couple were handed Domestic Violence packets and Harrison was arrested on charges of misdemeanor domestic battery.

One thing I’ve learned after all these years, it’s that chicks named Crystal (no matter what fucked up way they choose to spell it) are bad news.

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Comments


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  • CT

    Dick biting – so cliche.

  • 18th40

    She was a one-eyed, one-horned, flying purple penis eater.

  • Evan Oswald

    damnit[sic] morbid your write ups (and titles) rock

  • i wonder if it had been him biting her vulva if he’d have received misdemeanor charges

  • i wonder if it had been him biting her vulva if he’d have received misdemeanor charges

  • John Grizzly Adams Sheila Bosari Goodreau

  • John Grizzly Adams Sheila Bosari Goodreau

  • She looks like a dick biter… I would never allow her lips or mouth to come above my beltl line.

  • She looks like a dick biter… I would never allow her lips or mouth to come above my beltl line.

  • Zazen

    Is that–is that feathered hair?!

  • t0ofIy

    I imagine it would be embarrassing to be 24 years old and tell your friends you knocked up your 18 year old girlfriend. He should have given her her Amoxicillin.

  • Curlykate910

    you win!

  • EmilyRed

    instead of doing that she should of just bought some beanie weenies

  • EmilyRed

    white trash, it just grows that way

  • Deny Krystle Harrison Sex? That’s A Bit Dick – http://t.co/iPhT7tOjvo

  • t0ofIy

    I like that you put [sic] behind your misspelled word instead of correcting the error.

  • And here I am, cooking some pork bangers on a braai…

  • EveryVillainIsLemons

    I agree. I’ve never met a Crystal (of any spelling) who wasn’t a complete psycho.

  • Texas Ranger

    If a bitch bit my dick, no way I’d refuse treatment or press charges. That is way too important a body part to ignore.

  • CT

    Nice catch, Zaz, baby.

  • RedScarab

    Violence against women is deplorable…but some bitches needs to get stabbed.

  • JohnQknowitall

    Looking at her I can see why getting it up would be hard (pardon the pun) and who the fuck wants to stay with an abusive ass wipe anyway? There is probably more than enough that goes on in that house to get custody of the child.

    Honestly. One life, and then you’re dead and gone…

  • newstarshipsmell

    That ain’t fair. My best friend’s sister is named Crystal, and she’s a nice girl. I mean, her sole claim to fame is publishing a Metroid-knockoff where you play a jumping snail that throws boomerangs, but hey, it’s wildly popular. The craziest thing she ever did was, uh, run over herself with a parked car when she was five, but who’s perfect?

  • Chicks named crystal are bad news!!!!

  • Buffettgirl

    Vienna Sausages… it’s just SO much classier sounding… (as if class entered the picture in THIS story!)

  • Scretch

    This is why one must never say, “bite me”, when refusing sex.

  • Buffettgirl

    When I first read the title and saw the picture I thought this was going to be some “Dude pretended to be a chick” story – now I feel a little slighted… kind of like Krhystalle up there…

  • Athena

    Shit. And I thought my stint with Dude Looks Like a Lady was bad…

  • Heather_Habilatory

    Maybe it’s just the story fucking with my sleep deprived brain, but does she resemble a snapping turtle???

    And hey. My bestie is named Crystal and she’s not crazy. I thought she was for a while there until I realized it was some loser making her crazy.

  • 18th40

    It was bad ? That was like a slow loading flu, it didn’t hit me until 2 days after CT posted that…and now I still can’t get rid of it.

  • G.I.R.L.

    Once seen can’t unsee.

  • EmilyRed

    beanie weenies and vienna sausages are different.. but perhaps the vienna sausages would be better.. they are so creepy and cold.. heheheehe

  • EmilyRed

    I wonder if her middle name was meth

  • RT @dreamindemon: Deny Krystle Harrison Sex? That’s A Bit Dick – http://t.co/sZLKA3jJF1

  • What no nibbles tonight?

  • Wolf_of_Mars

    Don’t forget: Vienna Sausages have their own “Special” juice packed in…

  • He’s lucky she didn’t bite it clean through, with that big ole jaw of hers…. Looks mighty powerful!

  • I’m always up for a little biting during sex, just not there.

  • CT

    Ah ha….

  • That Is Why We Call It Flori-Duh !!!
    LMAO !!!

  • Gold Medal Winner !!!

  • It Is Called Bitch Slap For A Reason !!!

  • merl1

    I’ve had mine bitten, done right it’s pretty damn good.

  • Nick Trygg

    NO Way is she 19. i swear she could pass for 28-29 Any day of the week.