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coffeeST. JOSEPH, MO - A 16-year-old Central High School student was charged in juvenile court with third degree assault, after taking a piss in a coffee pot used by school faculty.

The incident happened in March, when some teachers who drank the coffee reported that the coffee tasted funny.

“A report was made that it tasted like chemical or cleaner – I’m not sure what the word was,” said St. Joseph Superintendent of Schools Dr. Melody Smith.  “There seemed like this personal coffee pot in a storage room, that the coffee tasted strange.”

An internal investigation was launched that included reviewing footage, frame by frame, from a hidden surveillance camera in the faculty room. Three weeks later, school staff were finally able to find the 16-year-old student responsible for tainting the coffee, and exactly what they’d tainted it with.

After notifying police, the teen was arrested and charged with third degree assault. If he’s convicted in juvenile court, he’s facing anywhere from probation, to being removed from his home and placed in a residential facility.

Todd Brockett, president of the St. Joseph National Education Association, said he believes two teachers drank the coffee, one of which sought medical care.

“She still has worries about her health concerns because she was told there is an incubation period for some particular types of diseases,” Brockett said.

I don’t know who told her that, as I wasn’t aware that human urine contained any diseases at all. But what do I know, I just drink the stuff. Not my own, though. That would be gross.

CBS 5 – KPHO

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  • http://www.facebook.com/ct.demondreamer Cris CT

    OK, maybe getting gross flavored coffee this morning by accident isn’t all that bad.

  • Evan Oswald

    kid must have been pissed off about something

  • EveryVillainIsLemons

    Urine is sterile until it leaves the body, unless someone has a urinary tract infection. Even then, though, the process of heating up the water in the coffee pot to boiling would kill the bacteria.

    All that being said, though, coffee is serious business, and if some asshole pissed in my coffeepot, I’m not sure what I would do, but it wouldn’t be pretty…or pleasant for Mr. Pisser.

  • http://www.facebook.com/JennyLane1031 Jennifer Lane

    it tasted a little yellow said the dumb twat being incubated hahaha poor guy…over piss…I mean Id be pissed if someone pissed in my cup but taking him from his family

  • Bop

    And the donuts weren’t actually “glazed” either.

  • Sam

    Arrested? At risk of being removed from his family and put in a facility? Seems like a very harsh way of dealing with a prank by a fully hormonal (i.e. out of his damn mind) teenager. Is a stupid prank worth ruining his whole future over?

  • JohnQknowitall

    Disgusting prank and I would be upset too, but the punishment here is a hard one to swallow (pardon the pun). Removing the kid from his home to a facility just seems stupid unless his parents/guardians encouraged this, but I doubt they did. At 16 this kid’s humiliation is probably one of the worst punishments, but being the civilized society we are, we will not stop until the kid is broken emotionally, financially and, if the courts allow, physically.

    One of the things I like best about myself is that I never repeat confidences… ever. You would think this would kill the thrill of gossip, but not so. A few of my straight male friends, unknown to each other, have urinarial tastes and some tend to not be very discretionary. None are ill or have ever been ill, though who knows what the future will bring? (I just listen stone faced thing “omg”) The worrisome teacher is probably fine and her neurosis have just been brought out into the light. For those of you who wonder how often this happens, it happens a lot. What does not happen a lot is that people are caught.

  • Sam

    Oh, and that teacher who’s flipping her lid about any ‘possible diseases she may have gotten from drinking piss’ needs to take a fucking chill pill. Good gawd, i haven’t even met the woman and i want to pull some sort of unsavoury prank on her.

  • JohnQknowitall

    I think that picture was created years ago and was waiting for this article on this blog. Perfect choice!

  • http://twitter.com/crimefan Professor Plumb

    Teen Charged With Assault After Pissing In Central High School Coffee Pot – http://t.co/E6NR6kw7x6

  • MyHovercraftIsFullofEels

    When I was in high school there was an ongoing game of trick your friend into drinking cafeteria apple juice that was, you guess it, piss instead of apple juice. I guess the trick was getting it to match the color. IDK, it was the jocks, but more than once it worked, which makes me wonder why it would ever work more than once.

  • Pyncky

    Except for Trichomonas vaginalis, a sexually transmitted parasite. Don’t let the name fool you, men can carry it too.

  • lespacino

    This is precisely why I don’t drink public, communal beverages- unless I clean the container and make it myself, in which case, I might as well just bring it from home.

  • http://www.facebook.com/jason.heeney.3 Jason Heeney

    That’s a bit fucked up what they may charge him with considering what the immature prank was. Also, I seriously want to bitch slap that neurotic bitch of a teacher who thinks she may have HIV or some shit from drinking piss.

  • driven .

    if this punks piss tasted checmical like or cleaner.. he must have a piss poor diet.. There are countless submissive types who who PAY people to piss into their yaps and WORSE.. yeah #2 .. and oddly enough no disease..although I pity the poor unknowing person who kisses them- ugh

  • newstarshipsmell

    Aw dammit, you beat me to the chance to show off what I know about piss. I’ll just add that it ceases to remain sterile outside of the body, as there are products inside it that attract bacterial growth… but that’s beside the point considering that it was boiled before human consumption.

  • Andyman

    I am *so* glad I didn’t grow up in the era of hidden cameras/cameras everywhere!!!

  • Wolf_of_Mars

    “… the worst part of waking up, is urine in your cup.”
    Everybody Sing!

  • Buffettgirl

    Oh go ahead M-F’er, just the once, ’cause when I find out and find YOU… we’ll I’mma rip your foul fool head off and piss down your throat, you bein’ so fond of piss and all… mess with my coffee/caffeine that way… fucktard… just sayin’…

  • Monique Crother

    I think the Teacher with “health concerns” is consulting an attorney to see how she can turn this into a payday. “Your Honor, the school should’ve known the potential risk in leaving said coffee pot unattended. My Client, whose love of coffee is well known in the community, has forever been damaged emotionally, mentally, and java-ly by this insidious crime ….” You know, 20 years ago we would’ve all laughed and gone on our way. NOT excusing the behavior, just the extreme responses that have become the norm…

  • CT

    And I was bitching about getting hazelnut instead of regular Joe this morning.

  • Evan Oswald

    being arrested ruins your future? naw.

  • Patrick Richardson

    Would you think it too harsh if it was your coffee and you had drank it? Bet not.

  • Patrick Richardson

    Perhaps he had tasted faculty coffee and thought he could improve it though I certainly hope this dim bulb doesn’t take up a culinary career unless it’s in jail where paybacks a bitch. Which is probably where his future lies unless he learns a lesson here. If not he’ll once again be pissing in taxpayers coffee.

  • http://www.facebook.com/jamie.fruita Jamie N. Fruita

    My son was in high school science class and his buddy was pissed (hah) that the teacher wouldn’t let him leave class to go to the restroom. Since he had just gone 5 minutes before she didn’t believe he needed to go again. So he peed in a beaker, sauntered up to the front of the class and slammed it on her desk. 3 days suspension and he was a HERO to his schoolmates.
    Big Eyeroll to the teacher concerned about disease. It’s gross but it’s not going to actually physically hurt you.

  • JohnQknowitall

    Can’t speak for Sam, but I can I would be upset, but I wouldn’t be vengeful.

  • Jycorro

    If I hear that damn song when I go to bed tonight I will hunt you down! LOL

  • weneedhelpnow

    Wouldn’t a disease resulting in bacteria in the urine be a possible contaminant? How about if pus or blood was in his urine? Article doesn’t make clear, but I’m guessing he peed in the already brewed coffee. Why so harsh on the victim? She should be concerned. Where does it say she’s flipping her lid?

  • Wolf_of_Mars

    Call ahead, I’ll greet you at the gate. LOL!

  • restlessvagabond

    “An internal investigation was launched that included reviewing footage, frame by frame, from a hidden surveillance camera in the faculty room.”

    If I was one of the teachers there I’d be more worried about the possibly illegal surveillance going on in the break room. Depending on the state there is a reasonable expectation to privacy, even at work, that must be abided by. Which includes no cameras in bathrooms or break rooms.

  • techsupp0rt

    It can’t replace what is already in my head for that jingle. As inspired by Janet Jackson’s coffee enemas: ?The best part of waking up, is Folgers in your butt! ?

  • techsupp0rt

    Apparently his family wasn’t attentive enough to bother potty training him, so I don’t see much of a down side to this.

    I’d say his future is probably already fucked if he’s 16 and pulling shit like this. If it wasn’t jail for this, it would be for something else.

  • Wolf_of_Mars

    Yeah, that’s a good one, too!

  • http://www.facebook.com/scout.kent.1 Scout Kent

    Why would the kid be humiliated? He didn’t accidentally drink piss. I would guess he was bragging about the prank. I don’t think he needs to go to adult prison for it, but certainly the judge should scare the piss out of him.

  • ultracreep

    I agree. There’s nothing you’re going to catch from pee that a little antibiotic won’t fix. It’s not like you’re going to catch HIV or some horrible life threatening illness from it. Maybe she’s looking towards finding some damages to sue for.

  • ultracreep

    Seriously?: You never did any dumb nasty shit as a kid? My sister chased me around the house with a shitty piece of toilet paper held between a pair of kitchen tongs. I never screamed so hard in my life…somehow she turned out not to be a criminal.

  • ultracreep

    Totally agree. Everyone’s so damn fragile these days.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Anna-Hall-Grillot/100000054600337 Anna Hall Grillot

    My older brother was sick as hell, he would wipe boogers on us, and he kept doing this thing where he would have our little brother open his mouth, close his eyes, and give him a “big surprise” of spitting in his mouth! Effing GROSS! And my brother is not a criminal, either.

  • JohnQknowitall

    I am almost certain he is humiliated, in hindsight, because of this tasteless (pardon the pun) act. Not all kids who do stupid things brag . Almost any kid would be humiliated knowing people he/she know and look up to are aware of what a disgusting act he/she committed – whether the kid shows humiliation or not.

  • http://www.facebook.com/steve.p.davis.1 Steve Paige Davis

    one of the best headlines to Story pic ever on DD. I was laughing so hard it took a few minutes to actually finish the story.

  • WarriorArtemis

    Ok, I’m terrible but this is funny as hell.

  • LeaveMeBe

    I know the longer it sits, the more it becomes ammonia which can kill anything, including lice. It sounds like this pee was consumed too quickly for that to happen, though.

  • LeaveMeBe

    Yes, I would think it was way too harsh.

  • LeaveMeBe

    I did something nasty as an adult that involved body fluids and food and I deliberately gave it to my boss. This was years ago, but I certainly knew better and didn’t give a damn, and I am not nor ever have been a criminal.

  • http://www.facebook.com/QJordon Quintin Jordon

    Damn, the coffee taste like it has a little wang in it today.

  • http://www.facebook.com/scout.kent.1 Scout Kent

    Hmm, perhaps I am too cynical, but I don’t see someone who thinks tricking people into drinking their piss is funny suddenly becoming embarrassed and remorseful simply because they get caught. Worried about their own ass, yes; humiliated, no.

  • http://www.facebook.com/scout.kent.1 Scout Kent

    Yes indeed! Profaning coffee that way, unforgivable. In all seriousness, I’m a little astounded at the posters who are saying – eh, it’s just someone else’s piss in my coffee, ain’t no big thang . . .

  • Buffettgirl

    I know! Sorry, but that stuff isn’t exactly tasty to begin with, let’s not be adding anything to it to make it worse! I drink it for the caffeine, not for the taste! I will forever be grateful to the folks that made flavored creamer! ;-)

  • ButtPlugg

    You can’t get away with anything in high school. Those melon farmers have cameras everywhere. And the punishment doesn’t fit the crime, they should just give him a piss ton of community service or something along those lines.