Updates by emailNEWSLETTER Subscribe to The Dreamin DemonRSS Subscribe to The Dreamin Demon

Steven Johnson Found Dead Hanging Off Cliff, Covered In Bee StingsCarl Cottee Jr. Has Been Accused Of Beating His Girlfriend’s 4-Year-Old To DeathTeenage Girl, Boyfriend Charged as Adults in Father’s MurderEx-councilman Charles Wingate Cited For Neglect After Autistic Teen Found Living In Filth.Teacher’s Aide Mario Hunt Charged With Child Sex Abuse, Knowingly Exposing Teens To HIVHaven Lee Norton, 10, Struck And Killed By His School Bus While Mother WatchedBraylee Rice, 14, Hanged Herself From Bleachers At Her Junior High SchoolICE Need Help Identifying John Doe Seen Sexually Assaulting Young GirlRev. Cedric Cuthbert Accused Of Viewing Child Porn At Disney ResortMan Reportedly Dies After Having Sex With Wasp’s Nest *HOAX*

Scorned Wife Craps On Kitchen Floor After Finding Hubby With Another Woman

January 9, 2013 at 11:15 pm by  

Scorned Wife Craps On Kitchen Floor After Finding Hubby With Another WomanVero Beach, FL - Brenda Schumann reportedly found her estranged husband in bed with his naked girlfriend and did what any scorned woman would do in the same circumstances; she took a shit on the kitchen floor.

According to police, late last month, Brenda Shumann, 51, barged into her soon-to-be-ex-husband’s bedroom at 2:30 am carrying a rifle and threatening to kill him and his lover.  Her husband was able to get the gun away from her.  Not to be defeated that easily, she then urinated on the carpet outside the bedroom then proceeded to the kitchen where she defecated on the floor.  She then found a second rifle and vandalized the house with it, smashing mirrors, pictures and Christmas decorations.

Her rage and her bowels finally empty, she vacated the premises, leaving the rifle behind.

Brenda was located at her nearby home later, resisted arrest, which almost never works, and is now charged with aggravated assault/domestic violence, battery and resisting arrest.

She is quoted as saying to her arresting deputies, “I found him in bed with a naked chick.  What was I supposed to do?”  Excellent question, Brenda.  I’m not one to admonish a scorned woman for acting a tad irrationally in matters of the heart, but I do wonder this; was the poop premeditated?  Did she save it all day for that confrontation?  Or was it more a matter of her getting so angry it made her have to poop?  Well, I think I’ve given us all plenty to ponder for now.

Tags: , , , , , ,

63 Comments

    Comments


    V2 Cigs electronic cigarettes - Break Free From The Pack!

    The views expressed in the comments are those of the comment writers and don't represent the views or opinions of D'D or its staff. Feel free to flag comments that may violate conditions outlined in our Disclaimer.

    • sweekymom

      Dear Brenda,

      What are you supposed to do? See the story below for a few ideas.

      Warm regards,
      Sweekymom

    • Sam

      I always thought marking your territory was the start of a relationship, not the end.

    • Sam

      Maybe she just wanted to make sure they got the “You’re in deep shit now!” message. You know, in case the death threats, rifle to the noggin’, and house smashed to pieces weren’t quite clear enough.

    • CT

      WTF you idiot! You know you are still gonna have to clean that shit up! Housework – a woman’s work is never done.

    • Sam

      I’m starting to see a link between residents of Florida and premature aging. So the question is, is it the fleeting looks that drive people crazy, or does the crazy work as a line-accellerant?

    • daMonBrooks

      I’m sure hes burning with desire for her now, Ah love <3

    • newstarshipsmell

      Maybe she just needed her litter box changed.

    • newstarshipsmell

      But they weren’t living together at that point. Unless you were referring to her ass crack. The write up doesn’t indicate whether or not she premeditated snatching a roll of toilet paper.

    • OutOfBubbleGum

      Bernad;

      I’m trouble sorry for condition your in. you’re Dyslexic I forgot. e-mail My read should:

      Crap the scare out of him.

      BubbleGumOutOf

    • JohnQknowitall

      I guess the message here is not to shit where you sleep.

    • Gee

      Right… Nothing is more attractive then a haggardly old woman taking a shit in the middle of the kitchen. Ugh

    • Sam

      Suddenly i worry that we’ve been given a rather too candid glimpse into what they normally got up to in the bedroom… :/

    • brandi

      hey, some people can shit on sight! kinda like when actors cry for the camera. if this is not the case, then i’m almost sure she got so angry she got the bg’s (bubble guts) and decided to put it to good use.

    • kcjosh

      Well this is just a shitty situation for all involved.

    • NY_Mommy

      Ewwww

    • Sam

      Well, if he made her sleep in the kitchen i guess he deserved to get assaulted like that… :P

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=736546181 Michael Heldman

      FUCK YOU!

    • JohnQknowitall

      Sam – that is an old cheating husband adage: a dog never shits where it sleeps translated never take your mistress to your wife’s house.

    • kimbev69

      i had a dog that pooped when you said “do your business” go figure

    • Gee

      I think you guys missed where it said,

      “Brenda was located at her nearby home later, resisted arrest”

      She didn’t live there with him. So technically she didn’t shit were she slept.

    • Buffettgirl

      It’s funny that I can visit this site several times a day for a couple of months now and yet I’m still surprised by the shit some people do. It’s the “WTF is WRONG with you” factor for me. I would never do something so crappy, I’d be too humiliated by the dung storm that would come after…

    • tkaz

      That’s the FIRST thing I thought!
      …But…at least…it was the kitchen floor & not the carpet.

    • tkaz

      Why are her Christmas decorations still up?
      Am I mentally unstable if that’s the only thing I questioned when reading this story….?

    • http://www.facebook.com/dre.mosley Dre Mosley

      I’m so mad, I could shit.

    • newstarshipsmell

      That’s a couple months late…

    • Abroad

      Those were his Christmas decorations. And if was clearly unlucky to have them up still….

    • tkaz

      She’s a task master – she took them down for him.

    • http://twitter.com/Q_Jordon Quintin Jordon

      Potty Train… Wrong home … wrong carpet…

    • CT

      Why so angry?

    • JohnQknowitall

      Correction: Never shit where your husband’s mistress lives! :P

    • alphatroll

      I think he commented on the wrong article… there’s a plethora of responses like that under the article posted by someone called “Aberrant”. (Apparently some kind of reference I didn’t get.)

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=736546181 Michael Heldman

      I haven’t been around much but I still wanted to properly introduce myself.

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=736546181 Michael Heldman

      Why so calm?

    • newstarshipsmell

      alphatroll, it is apparently tradition at the D’D to welcome new writers with a “Fuck You!” from the commenters. That is all.

    • midniteshadows

      She did it all wrong! What is the matter with these people? You’re supposed to soak rags in cat urine then rub the bedframe with it, along with any shoes, clothes, toothbrushes, remote control, appliances, anything that captures your fancy. Just ask my ex. :)

    • daMonBrooks

      Lolz. You funny.

    • Buffettgirl

      Why thank you very much kind sir… ;-)

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=718600192 Tim Bates

      She took the phrase “I am so mad I could just shit” to a very literal level.

    • Stormblast

      What did the cops do, put her face next to the messes she made and smack her with a rolled up newspaper, yelling “NO! WE DO THAT OUTSIDE!”?

    • LeaveMeBe

      Only you would think of this.

    • LeaveMeBe

      She peed on the carpet in the hallway.

    • LeaveMeBe

      Or maybe she was craving chilidogs.

    • LeaveMeBe

      This made me laugh uncontrollably! I swear, I’m going to have to be careful next time I say “I’m so mad, I could spit!” I have a bad feeling this might escape instead.

    • LeaveMeBe

      I’ve been coming here for years and still have total WTF moments. It’s kinda refreshing that people are so creative. :)

    • LeaveMeBe

      LOL!

    • newstarshipsmell

      Well someone has to think these things through.

    • Sam

      Oh, thanks for that. Now i’m going to be sat here all day wondering how you get a cat to wee in a bucket.

    • takurospirit

      Probably being white, in an area with lots of sun, and no sunblock.

    • Sam

      The sun reflecting off their aluminium foil hats probably also doesn’t help.

    • Aunt Cathy

      (Maybe the 3rd time I try to post this will be the charm…apparently Discus hates me!) Thanks for the insight, newstarshipsmell!! I’d noticed that several times while perusing the archives & wondered if the “F*** You” comments were an inside-thing. I’ve been a dedicated Demonite since stumbling across a link to this awesome site almost 8 months ago. I finally worked-up the courage to start posting comments a few weeks ago. (It doesn’t pay to bring anything less than your A-game when interacting with Demonites!!)

    • newstarshipsmell

      No problem. Normally when some new writer gets their first story posted, Morbid has given them an introduction in the comments and incited the rest of us to welcome them with a “Fuck you!” I’m guessing he had his hands full yesterday. He mentioned getting a number of writers lined up, so look forward to joining in during the coming days.

      And don’t be shy. God, look at how many upvotes I get with my recycled jokes.

    • CT

      I was just giving him shit – I knew what he meant. I wanted to him feel loved – the way Yeti loved him.

    • CT

      And you used the word – plethora. I love the word.

    • Eliza Berntsen

      I think that they know that if they were to start being repetitive, that no-one would want to read about their fucked up asses.

    • brandi

      yea i’d much rather her shit on the carpet than piss, piss soaks through, you’ll never get that smell out

    • LeaveMeBe

      Exactly.

    • wastintime

      Cheat on me bitch? I’ll shit on your floor! Old lady is awesome! But I wonder if the cheating was the reason for divorce, or if it’s because the wife is nuts?

    • alphatroll

      It is a lovely word, isn’t it?

    • alphatroll

      I shall bow to your superior wisdom and consider myself enlightened. :)

    • G.I.R.L.

      Something about this stinks.

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Anna-Hall-Grillot/100000054600337 Anna Hall Grillot

      If I were the police, I’d have rubbed her nose in it… Which is a good reason I have never entered law enforcement..

    • techsupp0rt

      Rage shit. Crime of passion.

    • Jack2

      I laughed so hard, I soiled myself.