Good day, sickos. I want to thank all of you for your calls and emails inquiring about my well-being and offering sex at various public parks. But fear not, I am just on a much-deserved, much-needed vacation. Although I am off this week, I will be writing up some stuff off and on while finally being able to focus on some DD house cleaning. I'll also have time to respond to some of you interested in writing. In the meantime, be sure to check out the forums for the latest in terrible news.

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Montgomery County, LA – Police in Louisiana have arrested 49-year-old Duane Parker after he allegedly sent sexual messages to more than a dozen preteens on Facebook, including a video of him masturbating while saying what he would like to do to a seventh-grade girl.

Parker got busted after an investigation into his online activities that started when the mother of one of the girls he contacted authorities after seeing messages from an unfamiliar name on her daughter’s Facebook page. The girl told her mother that she only accepted his friend request due to how many mutual friends that had in common.

His modus operandi seemed to be friending a young girl on Facebook, along with any of her friends, then begin innocently messaging them before bringing out the big guns. “He’ll chat with them for a while but then after befriending them he’ll start sending pornographic videos to them, whether it was video or still images,” said Captain Mark Seals.

By time investigators got involved, Parker had deleted his Facebook account and created a new one. Law enforcement discovered his new Facebook account and seen Parker had attempted to contact several more young girls. Investigators took control of the girl’s accounts and communicated with Parker, fooling him into believing they were the young girls.

He must have been naughty because on August 13 he was arrested and charged with two counts of online solicitation of a minor under 14. Parker, who has a 2010 conviction of indecent exposure after exposing his genitals to a 17-year-old Starbucks employee, was arrested while making a delivery to a restaurant for his company, 1-800-CRAWFISH. When he was arrested, he had his ten and six-year-old daughters with him. Both were taken into child protective services which, as it turns out, is a good thing and long overdue.

See, during their investigation, police discovered that Parker was accused of sexually abusing his then six-year old daughter. That case was supposed to be handed off to a grand jury, but that never happened. Current Galveston County District Attorney Jack Roady admits he is not 100 percent sure why the case had fallen through the cracks, but once it was discovered it was quickly resolved. “When it became clear that there was still an unresolved investigation from 2008, our first priority was to get the evidence presented to the grand jury. Last week, a Galveston County grand jury heard that evidence and indicted Parker for the offense of aggravated sexual assault of a child.”

Constable Kenneth Hayden of Precinct 4 called Parker every parent’s nightmare. “He’s the person you warn your kids about, and the reason we have to teach our children not to talk to strangers in person or online, even if they seem nice,” Hayden said. “Parker managed to befriend well over a dozen little girls without their parents’ knowledge with the intention of using them for his own twisted sexual gratification.”

This case is a clear example of the importance of monitoring your children’s online behavior. It’s important to know what your children are doing and who they are talking to. Because of one mother’s decision to so, other young girls are now protected from Parker’s deviancy — including his own two daughters.

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  • curiousalways

    Lou Ferrigno’s perverted twin brother, right here folks!

  • JohnQknowitall

    WHERE THE FUCK WAS THE MOTHER OF HIS CHILDREN?????????? SHE OR ANOTHER RELATIVE SHOULD HAVE BEEN SCREAMING FOR A GRAND JURY INDICTMENT!!!!!!!!

    ALSO:

    including a video of him masturbating while saying what he would like to do to a seventh-grade girl.

    Lovely. What a pig. Get this asshole out of society and put him into psychotherapy for life – we know he will be released one day so it cannot hurt.

  • disqus_BBtdmr4Ie5

    I don’t understand, if I was 12, and that dude tried to friend me, there’s no way I would accept. Was he posting pics that weren’t of him? perhaps of a Justin Bieber look-alike? Or did he assume that little girls like fairy tales and thus might be into trolls? Somebody explain.

  • OutOfBubbleGum

    His photo proves Darwin’s theory. Dam you John Thomas Scopes.

  • come_and_see

    I don’t remember hearing about this stuff back in my day of dial up internet and AOL. Probably because the internet was too slow to send pictures of your weenee and webcams cost $500.

  • Sam

    “you won’t like it when I’m horny…”

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Rochell-Arnold/100000587657456 Rochell Arnold

    I hope he gets the chair. What a douche.

  • Zazen

    The world is full of naifs. Plus, parents want to keep their kids’ innocence as long as they can sometimes; with the occasional disastrous result.

  • Athena

    Pre-teens shouldn’t have Facebook accounts to begin with, especially since so many parents are obviously incompetent. But, for as much as social networking sites are a vehicle for creeps, it always pleases me when one hangs himself with one.

  • http://www.facebook.com/rebekah.herzberg Rebekah Joanne Herzberg

    A lot of cybersex was going on back with dialup.

  • come_and_see

    Nothing spoiled it more than when you found out you cybered with a guy pretending to be a girl.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=23422362 Robin Camille

    In Louisiana, we have Parishes. Don’t know if that’s your error or APs. Just an FYI. Napoleanic Code.

  • AssWho?

    Said the same damn thing, Or the monkey from Planet of the Apes shaved. Just looks like a perv from the drop,

  • LuvsHorror

    I thought they couldn’t, I thought you had to be thirteen to have a face book account.

  • Athena

    Correct. Only a slight distinction, of course, as we all know a 13-year-old is every bit as capable as a 12-year-old of making amazingly bad decisions on a social networking site. Still, 13 is 13, and I wish more parents would observe the rule. It’s one extra year FB isn’t eating their child’s soul, as it does mine every day.

  • SayAunt

    I’m sure Wilma is furious and Betty & Barney will keep Pebbles away from the creep.

  • newstarshipsmell

    Luckily for me, Facebook has apparently ceased caring whether their site functions correctly in Firefox and Chrome, as it doesn’t for me in either browser, so I’ve ceased caring to waste my time on their site. My friends’ Facebook BS is hardly compelling enough to sway me to launch IE on any sort of routine basis, which is the only browser I’ve tried that it actually still works on.

  • Wildheart

    You beat me to it Robin…..there’s a Montgomery in Grant Parish if that’s what they meant. Also, I’m totally ashamed (but not surprised) that this douche is from my home state.

  • LoKi4778

    He certainly does resemble three-back-man…

  • http://www.facebook.com/HamsterNinjaofDOOM Alecia Hendricks

    My kids have the disadvantage of having a parent that understands computers. I don’t understand why a kid needs Facebook anyway, everyone they know they see at home/school. My oldest kids dad got him a cellphone when he had just turned 7 freaking years old, it was after we split so I assume it was for parent points.

    I laughed my ass off when he got a 400 dollar phone bill because my kid found the functions to download music and games that he hadn’t bothered to block :3

  • http://hawtmamas.wordpress.com/ hawtmamma

    I don’t understand this cruel world anymore! Why would this gentleman solicit unexperienced virgins EWWW! when there are literally millions of FULL GROWN WOMEN like myself who would do AND LET HIM DO anything to me he wanted! He has such strong features to! I WOULD DRAIN HIS PORK SWORD!!! He could get naughty with ALL MY WHOLES!

  • captaingrumpy

    I had to look at your photo twice ,just to check your sex.

  • neenaP

    Works fine for me on chrome

  • neenaP

    7 is way too young!

  • neenaP

    That’s what I am wondering, where is mom?

  • neenaP

    He wont considering this isn’t a death penalty case.

  • newstarshipsmell

    Yeah, I just belatedly realized that if I turn off Chrome’s Better Pop Up Blocker for Facebook, the site works again. Blocking pop-ups there didn’t cause trouble in the past, and I’d forgotten how to manage the blocker in Chrome. Still broken in Firefox, and I’ve tried everything including launching the browser in Safe Mode, still no dice. Oh well, I was free of Facebook for a while.

  • JGo555

    Sadly, while I thank the mother I feel more for those girls he created.

  • Pyncky

    Is it just me or does he look like Jeff Probst’s ugly older brother?

  • Lola

    Awesome- this a**hole is now locked up for his epic failure of attempting to diddle children that are not his own. BUT… WTF?? The officials uh **cough cough** let him ‘slipped through the cracks’ for FOUR YEARS ??? Wow. I think that word sums it up. Just, Wow.

  • Laura_RT

    My daughter likes to get on FB and play the games & talk to her friends/cousins who live in another state. I won’t let her have her own acccount though, she has to use mine, and people like this man are the reason why. I worry it’ll make me look creepy though, so whenever she friends one of her friends, I tell her she has to make it clear that it’s my daughter friending them and not me lol. We’ve had a few awkward moments where she’s on & one of my friends try to talk to her and I’ve had to un-friend a few people who posted inappropriate things. But knowing my kid is safe while she’s/he’s on it is more than worth it.

  • Laura_RT

    LOL my ex did the same thing. He got this cell that would only allow her to call four specific #s because he knew I wouldn’t let them have it otherwise. LOL, turned out they had absolutely no interest in calling him (they never asked, even one single time, & I sure as shit wasn’t gonna encourage it.). He would only exercise his visitation rights once or twice a year (he was supposed to get every other weekend), then when he did get them, he’d buy them all kinds of stuff to get bonus points, nevermind that he hadn’t paid so much as a single penny of child support in 3 or 4 yrs. It used to drive me crazy cause if he’d actually paid CS, I’d have been able to spoil them too. Of course, I didn’t complain because, not paying child support= not getting them more often. (I had left him because I’d found child porn on his computer. I was court ordered to allow unsupervised visitation) He’s in prison now after being convicted of very similar charges to the ones in this story. Only when he went to go meet the girl he thought he’d been chatting with, with a loaded gun in his back pocket and another in his glove compartment. He got ten yrs, which means my kids will be old enough to not have to visit him, thank God.

  • Laura_RT

    All of my nieces and nephews (who are old enough to read, which is 5 out of 7) have a FB account. Of all of them, only two of them are actually 13+ yrs. It’s not like FB checks ID’s, all the kids have to do is lie about their age.

  • Laura_RT

    LOL, I always wonder about how these guys think a little teen or tweeny girl is gonna wanna see that… When my ex got caught, one of the first thoughts I had after hearing he sent naked pics of himself to the girl/undercover LE was ‘Ew, did he really think some little 14 yr girl is gonna look at his hairy man-boobs and think, “Oh, I wanna piece of that!” Most girl that age (including myself at that age) are ridiculously superficial. They want a guy that looks like Jacob from Twilight or Cody Simpson, not Drew Carey or John Goodman.

  • Laura_RT

    I once heard the Neanderthals didn’t die off, instead that they interbred themselves until there were no pure blooded Neanderthals left. (I also heard that Ozzy Osbourne has some Neanderthal DNA in him proving it to be true. Now, IDK the validity of this but, my one of my first thoughts after seeing this guy was, “Part Neanderthal!”

  • Laura_RT

    LOL, I should have read through all the comment before commenting myself, then it wouldn’t look like I was just rewording your thought. The best I can come up with was either they think far too much of themselves or that their mirrors lie to them…

  • Laura_RT

    It seems to me that fot every pedo out there not getting caught there are at least a half dozen who aren’t…

  • UniqueMommy1984

    Sorry you had to deal with someone like that. :-(

  • Wolf_of_Mars

    My “wife” has F/B, and it works just fine on the Aurora version on Firefox for Windows, even with the pop-up block enabled..

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Rochell-Arnold/100000587657456 Rochell Arnold

    Maybe not, but people like this don’t reform. Why keep them alive?

  • starspringsf

    I know. what’s with the monkey ears on the shrimp farmer?

  • roxy vandiver

    This writer plagurizes everything she writes. It’s such a joke. http://truthbetoldnomorelies.blogspot.com/2012/02/theives-among-us-rebekah-herzberg.html

  • newstarshipsmell

    What the hell are you talking about?
    http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/plagurize

  • http://hawtmamas.wordpress.com/ hawtmamma

    r u gonna let me drain your lizard!?

  • http://www.facebook.com/YourFriendlyNeighborhoodJewishGirl Rebekah Herzberg

    How clever you are Elske McCain. Stalking all of my articles and
    commenting under them while using my best friend’s name. You cannot even
    spell plagiarize and you’re slandering me on my own article. All of my
    articles on here are my own words. You spend an awful lot of your time
    thinking about me and writing several blogs about me and calling me a
    pedophile. Do you have some cam shows to record for your three fans?All of that hard work, only for me to see it a month later. You must be really tired.

  • http://www.facebook.com/YourFriendlyNeighborhoodJewishGirl Rebekah Herzberg

    It’s an internet troll named Elske McCain that has her own cam shows. She admittingly watches everything I do and is a racist :)

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=736546181 Michael Heldman

    Interesting squabble Rebekah. Just curious, what do you have to say about the links she cites to prove you are copying work? Just want to hear your side of it also.

  • http://www.dreamindemon.com Morbid

    She did not plagiarize this article, or any other article she has written for the site, so you are wrong about that.

    As for the past accusations, I was aware of them long before she started submitting stories. She explained her side of the story and if she feels like stating so to any of our readers then that’s up to her. Personally, I could care less.

    Most of the comments you see against Rebekah have less to do with anyone concerned with any type of integrity and more to do with petty horror drama from a group of women who can’t get into show business or modeling any other way than by showing their fake-blood soaked tits to the masturbating adolescent or the 30+ year-old-loner who thinks they may score by sending them money to pay their phone bill.

    The online horror community blows as much maggoty, bloated donkey cock as the online crime community.

  • newstarshipsmell

    Well it’s always comforting to meet people like Elske when I’m feeling like a pathetic loser with no life.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=736546181 Michael Heldman

    Nevermind my question @facebook-1121852254:disqus …. this answer is enough for me. Was an interesting catfight topic though.