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Colorado Teacher Accused Of Exposing Himself At Garage SalesBoulder, CO – A Boulder High School teacher has been arrested after two women say he purposely exposed his genitals to them while shopping at two different garage sales.

According to police, Jim Kozlowski was at a garage sale Saturday morning when he employed a horribly ineffective ice-breaker. According to Commander Jeff Satur, Kozlowski intentionally exposed his twig and berries as they both shopped at a garage sale. “The victim said the suspect knelt down near some clothes, with his right knee on the ground and his left knee bent, with his left foot on the ground,” said Satur. “He asked the victim about the clothes, and then he pulled his shorts away from his leg with his left hand so his genitals were exposed through the left leg opening.”

Sure, Kozlowski’s peek-a-boo could have just been accidental, but police say after he left that garage sale his pork sword was spotted at another garage sale a block away. This time a woman stated Kozlowski repeated the same actions as before. “She says his right knee was on the ground, his left knee was bent and his left foot was on the ground,” said Satur. “His shorts were loose fitting above his knee. And when he squatted down, his genitals were completely exposed and visible through the left leg opening of the shorts.”

The woman told police she felt the act was intentional. Enough so that someone there recorded his license plate as he drove away. Police agreed with the woman and used the license plate info to track down Kozlowski and arrest him at his residence. He was booked into jail on one count of suspicion of indecent exposure. Satur says it’s up to the district attorney if they want to charge him with a second count.

Satur says he notified the Boulder Valley School District after Kozlowski’s arrest and their response was quick. They immediately placed Kozlowski on administrative leave pending the outcome of the criminal investigation. The principal of boulder High School also released the following letter to parents:

Dear Boulder High Community,

Many of you have likely seen recent news concerning the arrest of a Boulder High School teacher this past Saturday (8/4) in Longmont on two misdemeanor counts of indecent exposure as announced Saturday evening by the Longmont Police Department. I know that a report such as this can be a disturbing one for our school community raising questions and concerns among students, parents, guardians and staff. I will share with you what information I can at this time. It is important to note that what was alleged to have occurred in Longmont on Saturday did not occur while this teacher was acting in a coaching or teaching capacity.

The teacher, Jim Kozlowski, has, as of today (8/6/2012), been placed on paid administrative leave pending the outcome of investigations by law enforcement and BVSD administration. Paid administrative leave does not represent a determination of right or wrong on the part of an employee. It simply recognizes that a matter of serious concern has arisen that requires an investigation be carried out without the employee on the job. There is no higher priority for me — and the rest of the BHS staff — than to have our school be a safe and welcoming place for each and every student. I am not aware of any concerns about this teacher’s interaction with any BHS students during his tenure in our school.

This type of situation can create stress for any member of our community especially students. I urge any student, parent or guardian who feels it would be helpful to have professional assistance in dealing with their reaction to this matter to please contact the BHS Counseling Office at 720-561-5351 for support.

While I cannot discuss the specifics of this personnel matter, I am available to discuss whatever other questions or concerns you may have about how this situation affects you and your family. I can be reached at either kevin.braney@bvsd.org or 720-561-2200. Finally, if you have information that you think law enforcement should know, please contact either the Boulder Police Department at 303-441-3300 or our school resource officer (SRO) Mike West, who is a Boulder police officer, through the school office at 720-561-2200. If you wish to make a report anonymously, you may call the State of Colorado’s SAFE2TELL line at 1-877-542-7233.

Kozlowski, who is also the golf coach for the high school, hasn’t made any comments since his arrest but some of his students started a Facebook page (Free “Slim Jim” Kozlowski) and are standing by the teacher. While they say he is innocent, some do not feel the same. “I think he has perhaps the biggest reputation as a teacher for being a perv,” one person posted.

I am not ashamed to admit that I have been in a similar position before, so I am reserving judgement. As I explained to police, my exposure was not sexual in nature and simply done for entertainment purposes.  See, nothing puts a smile on my face faster than the repeated slapping noises my genitals make as I thrust back and forth with my legs spread and my pants down to my ankles. I do it whenever I am feeling sad or depressed. I can’t help people at my mother’s funeral didn’t find it as therapeutic.

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Comments


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  • Sam

    I guess you never know what little treasures you may find at a garage sale.

  • Sam

    So i guess it’s safe to assume he hangs to the left. And that right there is more than i ever wanted to know about this man.

  • EveryVillainIsLemons

    “Sorry, but I’m looking for something much bigger.”

  • SayAunt

    Sounds like Mr. Kozlowski was pretty proud of his Polish kielbasa.

  • Pyncky
  • http://www.facebook.com/timothymatthewmurphy brain_bomb

    Hahaha! Awesome!

  • http://www.facebook.com/timothymatthewmurphy brain_bomb

    Is it me or does this guy’s mouth contain just one big yellowy orange tooth?

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  • LoKi4778

    As happy as the sound of my member slapping to and fro against my legs makes me, it’s not as impressive as pulling out the “helicopter” when trying to woo a lady…

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=736546181 Michael Heldman

    Not sure why the ladies don’t enjoy the occasional peep, like if the roles were reversed. It might have something to do with males coming off as creepy while a woman can do it and look provocative. Exhibitionism is actually more common than you might think. Some people just like the thrill of being “seen”. That said, this guy might want to refine his approach a bit to include flirting and finding an actual willing participant, his current approach is one step shy of trying to poke a lady with it and saying “eh?”

  • Sam

    Operative word “trying”. ;)

  • http://twitter.com/Bigcced Cedric

    It appears to me that while Jim may actually be a perv – it’s also possible that he is only guilty of poor choice in clothing,and not having a penis that appealed to his viewing public.

    Years ago I was living on the Marine base in Yuma.AZ.Back then guys wearing shorts that were actually short was in style.I was in my room getting dressed and I was surprised to find that I had no clean underwear,because I hadn’t done my wash.Well I really wanted to go into town to a bar for a few drinks so I made a decision to just put on a pair of shorts,and go without the underwear.I had been in the bar for quite a while,sitting at a table when I happened to look down at my lap … I was startled to see my penis was fully exposed.None of the females working in the bar had said anything to me about this but several of them had been over to my table – taking my order,bringing me my drinks,etc. I immediately got up and exited the bar feeling embarrassed. In retrospect I guess that if people won’t tell you that you have mucus hanging out your nose when you are talking to them you probably shouldn’t expect them to tell you when your dick is hanging out of your shorts either.

  • JohnQknowitall

    Thanks for posting the telephone numbers and other contact information for every nut job on the web. Busy at work I have not been able to communicate in a hateful way… yet.

  • tinalib13

    I was at the beach one summer with my in-laws and some other family. One night while sitting around the fire with the family and friends, I happened to look at one gentlemen who was telling a funny story. He was wearing some short shorts, and I happened to glance down and see his penis and balls hanging out. This man was older and not what you’d call “sexy” by any means. I immediately looked at my father-in-law who was looking at me with a shocked expression on his face. It was sooo fucking awkward! We looked anywhere but at this guy the rest of the time he was there.

    Finally he left, and as soon as he did we both looked at each other and cracked up laughing. No one else noticed but the two of us, which made it even funnier. I always thought that the guy didn’t realize his junk was out, but after being on D’D and reading all these stories, I’m not so sure anymore. Maybe he just needed some air??

  • http://twitter.com/Bigcced Cedric

    Thanks for proving my point.

  • tinalib13

    Now I see what you’re comment meant above. I did not know this gentlemen well at all, so it would have embarassed us both for me to tell him his junk was hanging out. I’m sorry, but I just couldn’t do it. Now, if this had been a close friend or my husband, I’d have been happy to point out their parts were out. Cedric, if the girls were coming over to your table maybe they liked what they saw… ;)

  • tinalib13

    Most welcome. <3

  • tinalib13

    Ahhh family jewels??

  • tinalib13

    “See, nothing puts a smile on my face faster than the repeated slapping noises my genitals make as I thrust back and forth with my legs spread and my pants down to my ankles.”

    Morbid, it’s good I don’t know what you like. I’d probably never be ablt to look you in the face again. I’d be staring at your crotch and wondering what your penis looks like waving hello to me.

  • Eliza Berntsen

    And there I was thinking that garage sales is THE place where to display your junk in hopes of someone taking a fancy to it.

  • sugarpie

    I guess teacher of the year is out of the question now.

  • http://twitter.com/Bigcced Cedric

    This is why I loves you Tina … you are a sweetheart.

  • tinalib13

    Awww thanks Ced. So are you handsome. Big hugs to you!!

  • http://www.dreamindemon.com Morbid

    I tremble with fear at your future rage.

    Those numbers were placed in a letter sent by the principal to every parent of a student at that high school and are to be used in case anyone may want have questions, comments or want to report any other activity that may pertain to the case against Kozlowski.

    Besides, every one of those numbers in that letter, aside from the state of Colorado’s SAFE2TELL, are prominently displayed on the Boulder High School web page. http://p12.bvsd.org/boulderhigh/staff.aspx

  • JGo555

    If only Jim had kept his legs Klozoed.

  • JGo555

    I stumbled into my bedroom 2 nights ago. The husb was wearing boxer shorts. His balls hanging out. It was on purpose. It was THAT HOT. I just like to lightly poke them. He HATES ME for those few minutes where I call him old geezer.

  • OutOfBubbleGum

    Why is this illegal? He’s in Boulder, Colorada showing his boulders.

  • Athena

    It’s got to be biological. For females, the proportion of the breasts and hips, among other things, will signal to a male the childbearing health of a female. From a biological standpoint, the visual of a penis and balls isn’t really associated with any significance.
    So, it’s not that women don’t want to see it because dudes come off as creepy… it’s that dudes come off as creepy because women don’t want to see it. And dudes know this. So, generally speaking, we have no choice but to assume you’re getting some sick pleasure out of forcing this unwanted sight upon us… and we’re usually right.

    *In the interest of full disclosure: I use terms like “we” and “us” loosely. Doesn’t bother me, any.

  • JohnQknowitall

    It was just a joke! I read the article!!! LOL

    —– Reply message —–

  • Eliza Berntsen

    Oh, gee, thanks! Your story just reminded me of my grandpa who always wore oversized boxers and had his junk fall out of them and all over the place when sitting.

  • Eliza Berntsen

    His surname means a male goat/ billy goat. In Russian calling a man the name of a male goat basically means calling him an idiot. Seems kinda fitting in this case- his surname has been telling him his whole life that he’s an idiot.

  • Eliza Berntsen

    Does your dick hang low?
    Does it wobble to and fro?
    Can you tie it the knot?
    Can you tie it in the bow?
    Can you throw it o’er your shoulder like a regimental soldier?
    Does your diiiiiick haaang loooooow?

    Altogether now…..

  • David

    “Can you throw it o’er your shoulder like a regimental soldier?… While you’re in Boulder…”

  • tinalib13

    Oh gross! Sorry Eliza!!

  • https://twitter.com/#!/AngelsMom0806 Angels Mom

    I agree with Athena on both paragraphs, including it doesn’t bother me any.

  • tinalib13

    Unless it’s Gerard Butler of course. That I’d like to see.

  • pikeman

    Well, as fucked up as it is, it seems that these victims he exposed himself to were paying pretty damn close attention to his junk. They even noticed the exact way he knelt, and that his dangly bits popped out of the left side of his shorts. Pretty damn observant.

    I always wondered why us guys junk seems to hang to the left. It’s just a lot easier to let it hang out of the left side than the right, if you’re gonna let it hang out.

  • pikeman

    I’d tremble in fear, too. Look at that angel face. It’s just a matter of time before gay angel-faced John snaps and goes on a fucking killing spree!

  • pikeman

    If so, you need an over-the-shoulder-boulder-holder.

  • captaingrumpy

    He should just go home and have a wank. The feeling will soon pass.

  • The_Yeti_Knows

    I wondered why he wouldn’t take 80¢ for the Halloween pumpkin with the surprised look on its face.

  • The_Yeti_Knows

    Thank God that’s over.

  • The_Yeti_Knows

    Ced ?….still got those shorts? Zip on over to Tina’s and trim some cactus or something wouldya?

  • The_Yeti_Knows

    Zip on down to the Navy base there Migeul and give a try, wear that nice mesh tank you been saving while you’re at it.

  • The_Yeti_Knows

    Maybe he can shave it inside of 2 minutes in a dark bathroom, teach that properly and there might be a golden razor in it for you.

  • The_Yeti_Knows

    Grumps advice for everything? You should host a talk show.. first guests… heldman,pikey and gummy… you can title it. Efficient three way tugs… hobo style.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=736546181 Michael Heldman
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  • The_Yeti_Knows

    Not playin, never trusted you Iranians much…. too much camel DNA

  • bored_stiff

    Speaking of camel, are still the local camel toe repairman?

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Anna-Hall-Grillot/100000054600337 Anna Hall Grillot

    Speaking for myself, I would so much rather just leave it to the imagination. I have been married twice, and have 3 little boys, so penises don’t offend me, but they aren’t attractive, or provocative, either. Viewing one does nothing nothing for me.

  • Clayton Knudsen

    I am wondering can the “starlets” that ” accidentally flash their ” primarily nocturnal, large, semi-aquatic rodent” and the paparazzi catches photographic evidence, cannot they also be charged with the same thing as this “gentleman”. I am just pontificating.

  • The_Yeti_Knows

    Qualified back in ’11 to monitor any and all panty hamsters have the slippery glide to serve in my beloved corps.

  • The_Yeti_Knows

    You’re not fooling anyone…. truth is you’re literally jumping up and down trying to shake out that “innie” now aren’t ya fishy?

  • The_Yeti_Knows

    You sound like you’re a little iron deficient today Tina… order the liver n onions n penis for lunch.

  • http://twitter.com/Bigcced Cedric

    I read your comment yesterday John,and I actually thought you were making a joke … I thought everyone knew that in cases like this contact numbers are essential;they give people who may have also been victims a way to contact the correct authorities involved in the case,and by eliminating a lot of guess work on the part of victims,or on the part of people who have information on other victims it increases the odds that they may come forward with valuable information on a case.

  • CT

    I have had more then one incident when I saw the franks and beans when I was not expecting it. And it involved gym shorts and it was also years ago when shorts were shorter so I can see how it can happen by accident. Though one of them at the time was trying to woo me and after the surprise appearance of his “little friend”, I realized it was not going to happen. From what I saw, it wasn’t worth my time.

  • http://twitter.com/Bigcced Cedric

    AHH … I thought so.

  • rensuchan

    I swear if Colorado had the population of Florida they’d have just as much representation on this site. I think something with the altitude makes people there crazy as shit.

  • Reen B

    …one step shy of trying to poke a lady with it and saying “eh?”

    ^^^^ Thanks a lot, you’ve made me snort at my screen at work!

  • Guest

    Actually, I’m the one not fooling anyone. I’m just an insecure yeti who has to be an ass to others to make my pathetic self look better.