DELTONA, Fla. – I’ll be honest. I’m only posting this story because of the mugshot. The details surrounding the moments before it was taken do not stray far from you average “drunken idiot resisting arrest” story we are all familiar with.
Police say they found the man pictured, 29-year-old Kelsey Smith, sitting inside a running Audi that was parked at an intersection. Officers noticed the smell of alcohol, Smith’s slurred speech and sporting eyes that resembled a pair of freshly f*cked assholes.
They ordered Smith out of the vehicle to participate in some field sobriety tests, but he refused and was Tased in the leg.
“The Taser cycle was basically ineffective, and Smith continued resisting,” the police report said.
When police tried to put handcuffs on Smith, he became physically combative and was Tased a second time. Finally secured, Smith repeatedly banged his head and face on the roof of the police car, causing his nose to bleed. Smith continued being combative and started spitting blood at the officers, so a hobble was placed on his legs and a spit hood over his face.
On the way to Volusia County Branch Jail, Smith yelled that he has AIDS, HIV and hepatitis C, and was contaminating the vehicle forever. As evident by his mugshot, Smith continued resisting officers at the jail and had to be physically restrained in order to get the awesome mugshot that landed him on the news.
Smith was charged with driving under the influence and resisting without violence.
We here at D’D should start our own match-making service. We could pair up people we feature on this site in the hopes that they find their true love. In this case, I would be happy to hook Smith up with Tiffany Pocock in the hopes of Smith impregnating Pocock with a future D’D article.Tags: alcohol, Crime, DUI, Florida, Kelsey Smith