Home > Crime > Canadian Police Waiting On Jewel Thief To Pass Diamond He Swallowed

Canadian Police Waiting On Jewel Thief To Pass Diamond He Swallowed

May 18, 2012 at 1:27 pm by Pazuzu

Windsor, Ontario - Ladies and gentleman, I would like to introduce you to every woman’s dream — a man that shits diamonds. Or one that’s about to, anyway.

According to Ontario police, 52-year-old Richard Matthews went to Precision Jewellers in Ontario and attempted to swap a real diamond with a fake one. When store employees confronted him over swapping out a $20,000 , 1.7 carat diamond with a fake he had brought along, he proceeded to gulp down all the evidence.

Matthews was arrested on a suspicion of theft charge and placed in a cell with no toilet. Whenever he has to take a dump, he has to do so in a bucket. Afterwards, a gloved technician must sift through Matthews’ nuggets in hopes of finding the really expensive one.

X-rays revealed that Matthews is concealing two fake diamonds in his intestines. The real diamond cannot be seen because it’s translucent. Police have been patiently waiting for Matthews to pass the gem for over a week and expect it complete its journey any day now.

According to authorities, Matthews has been cooperative with police and is taking laxatives during his meals. He has already made several attempts at passing the gem but they have been unsuccessful. Once police have the dirty diamond in their possession, Matthews will be charged with possession of stolen property.

I, for one, do not envy the person whose job it is to procure and secure the evidence in this case. Also, do diamonds come with the equivalent of a Carfax? Personally, if I paid 20 grand for a diamond, I would hope that it was dug out of a mountain by a bonded child in India, not pulled from some Canadian’s turd.

Tags: Canada, Crime, Diamond, Richard Matthews, Theft

60 Comments

Comments

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sugarpie

He probably stuck the real one in his cheek and swallowed the rest. He hid it somewhere else.
LeaveMeBe

I refuse to watch a movie entitled Shit Diamonds.
LeaveMeBe

The real one will be in his cheeks any day now according to the article.
Jycorro

Diamonds are forever, this shit’s real!
EmmyDearest

So its a blood and a shit diamond?
Gee

Hate to be the low man on the totem pole at the jail facility.
OutOfBubbleGum

“a gloved technician must sift through Matthews’ nuggets”

And you thought you had a shitty job.
EmmyDearest

I am wondering if they are just going to wipe that fucker off and put it back on the shelf.. do they have to disclose that information? Like, “yes madam, this is one of our finest gems, ahem, squeezed so tightly and so beautiful..” And some bitch is going to have that shit on her finger, shoving it in all of her friends faces hahahahahaahaaa…
CT

My husband needs to pick up the pace. First I hear about men who leaves presents on doorsteps and now a man who shits diamonds. He had better start pressing some coal between his ass cheeks and be quick about it.
http://oddlyunfocused.blogspot.com/ Eccentric_Lady

Y’know Gee, the low man on the totem pole is usually also the FNG. Since the FNG usually causes a lot of headaches – wee payback isn’t too shabby.
EmmyDearest

even if leonardo dicaprio is in it?
http://twitter.com/tinalib13 Tina Wech

Now that was funny CT! Made me spray my tea! lmao
CT

Every once in a while I pull a good one out of my ass.
http://twitter.com/tinalib13 Tina Wech

Oh girl, you are on that SHIT today…hehehehe
http://twitter.com/RudestBuddhist RudestBuddhist

If they had sharp edges, would they be considered Blood Diamonds?
CT

I’m going on vacation tomorrow. You’ll have Pete all to yourself for a whole week.
http://twitter.com/tinalib13 Tina Wech

Oh you’re so lucky! Where are you off to? Gosh I’ll miss you! But I’ll certainly enjoy Pete lol
CT

Nags Head, NC. Thanks for asking and enjoy.
http://twitter.com/tinalib13 Tina Wech

Have a great time CT! Talk to you when you get back girly.
SayAunt

Been in there a week? Well he’s 52 maybe it’s time for a colonoscopy. Diamond in the ruffage.
Zazen

@Pazuzu:disqus , that was an epic first line. I read it out loud to my office and people nearly fell out of their chairs. Nice one.
http://profiles.google.com/coldlogic HAL 9000

A diamond in the rough as it were.
LeaveMeBe

Ugh. Especially if Leonardo DiCaprio is in it.
OutOfBubbleGum

Environmentally speaking, his method is better than ‘paper’ or ‘plastic’. Of course, he is passing up the free gift wrapping.
CT

I have a dumb question – Zazen, how do you highlight someone’s name like that – i.e. Pazuzu’s name above.
Snickering_Hydra

No kidding. And he has supposedly been taking laxatives with his meals. Sounds to me like that thing is stuck in there good and deep.

Next step may just be to schedule a mining expedition into the brown abyss.
Snickering_Hydra

This guy might also be into subdermal jewelry, but may have been misinformed as to the actual procedure…

** A subdermal implant refers to a kind of body jewelry that is
placed underneath the skin, therefore allowing the body to heal over the
implant and creating a raised design. These kinds of implants fall
under the broad category of body modification.
Many people who have these implants use them in conjunction with other
types of body modification to create a desired, dramatic effect.This process is also known as a 3-D implant or pocketing. — Wikipedia

http://jatim.org/wp-content/uploads/2011/03/Weird-and-Wild-Subdermal-Implants.jpg

Now think of those diamonds surfacing in unusual areas!
HotReadingMama

Or ruffage.
HotReadingMama

Shit, I see that has already been used.
hershey

@CT You put an @ sign in front of the name.
hershey

Ooops, fail. LOL

I thought that’s what I did before.
CT

Thanks! @hershey61:disqus
JohnQknowitall

I am with you in not envying the shit sifter. Why didn’t they give him Go Lightly (the same pre op stuff that is given to patients having a procedure involving the intestines)?

I guess when it comes to shit sifting, some guys are purists.
hershey
whisperswing

lol this is where I live at last update he hasnt passed it yet and has given permission for laxitives to be used

they are xraying him through out the day and have in solitary in case another inmate wants to beat him up and steal the diamond
whisperswing

DIAMOND UPDATE as of tonight at 8:35
2012-05-18 20:24:35The man arrested in Windsor and known as the “diamond switcher” has passed a stone but it was a fake diamond.52-year-old Richard MacKenzie Matthews is accused of swallowing a 20-thousand dollar diamond at a jewelry store last week.Windsor Police Sergeant Brett Corey says 2 more stones are in the man’s intestinal tract.Corey has no idea when the 2 remaining stones will be passed and the suspect will stay in custody until then.Matthews is also wanted in other jurisdictions.When the diamonds are passed, he’ll likely be charged with possession of stolen property.http://www.am800cklw.com/headlines.php
pikeman

A dude who shits diamonds would be one gem of a guy.
pikeman

I’d rather be panhandling in the ghetto, than have that shitty job.
whisperswing

Alleged diamond swallower passes fake diamond a gift only a police officer could appreciate: a fake diamond in a pile of feces.Windsor police said they recovered a stone Friday morning from the bowel movement of the man suspected of swallowing a $20,000 diamond after attempting to steal it by switching it with a fake one. An analysis revealed it was a cubic zirconia, not the real thing.The suspect consented to an ultrasound exam at the Hotel-Dieu Grace Hospital Friday afternoon, which revealed there are still two stones in the man’s intestinal tract. “At the time of this writing, it is unknown when the stones will be expelled,” Sgt. Brett Corey said in a release.[...]http://blogs.windsorstar.com/2012/05/18/alleged-diamond-swallower-passes-fake-diamond/
JGo555

@Pazuzu:disqus
FUCK YOU!

(it’s the standard DD welcome for a writer)
JGo555

Amen.

I hate his ass ever since he RUINED Titanic for those of us that was actually interested in the story.

I wanted my money back. He IS NOT and has NEVER BEEN HANDSOME/CUTE in my books.
JGo555

Bleach baby!
JGo555

My place IS IN THE OPPOSITE DIRECTION!
JGo555

Did the guy on the left love Dunkin Donuts so much, he just HAD to have his doughnutty thoughts show through his skin for others to “admire”???
JGo555

Wouldn’t it be hilarious if the dude that shifted it… MISSED IT????
http://twitter.com/icyspring6 okYeah

here’s what he needs to do:
shit & swallow. shit & swallow. repeat. repeat. repeat, etc.
kimbev69

I see what u did there
VXIII

Wouldnt a few enemas get it out? If thats a dumb question overlook, im not used to getting things out of my ass,
http://truecrimereport.com iLLusionS

And you thought shitting was free..This dude is about to shit out a 20,000 dollar diamond, I mean damn!
If someone has to “sort through the shit” to find it, they might also keep it and claim it was never found.
But if it is found, I pity the fool that buys that shitting thing.
TheLadyDragon

Ok first the memory card in the hang-gliding incident and now this…
are Canadians more likely to swallow non-food objects in an attempt to conceal truths and crimes?
*snickers*
I’d love to put together some statistics on this! hah!
- A Canadian.
whisperswing

Diamond still inside man who swallowed it: Cops

http://www.torontosun.com/2012/05/18/diamond-still-inside-man-who-swallowed-it-cops

Canadas claim to fame,we dont have guns so we have to find other alternative forms of fun
According my BFFs dad hes a retired cop here hes still got them in himat last update
Zazen

Looks like the RMCP’s taking shit from just anybody.
newstarshipsmell

For some reason I want to play Lunar: Eternal Blue.
LeaveMeBe

I just don’t think he’s that cute, not that looks are everything mind you, but most movies he’s in he just annoys me. Now, he was awesome in The Departed.
whisperswing

Stone recovered from “diamond switcher”

The “diamond swticher” saga entered a new phase Saturday after an alleged jewel thief passed a $20,000 diamond Windsor police have anxiously awaited for more than a week.
Police have been waiting for Richard MacKenzie Matthews, 52, to pass the stone since he swallowed a 1.7-carat diamond Thursday, May 10, at Precision Jewellers on Howard Avenue after allegedly trying to switch the diamond with a cubic zirconia.
Staff Sgt. Dave Kigar said Matthews passed the stone during a bowel movement Saturday afternoon.
“At Mr. Matthew’s request he has since been transferred to the County Jail where he is resting a little more comfortably than he was in our dry cell,” Kigar said about the suspect being held in a cell without a sink or toilet for the past nine days.
“We’ve got the diamond and an additional charge will be laid against him of possession of stolen property.”
[...]
http://blogs.windsorstar.com/2012/05/20/stone-recovered-from-diamond-switcher/
Andy P

HAHAHA. I saw what you did there!
Andy P

You forgot the wipe part. LOL
Zazen

I love that game =D
sweatpoo

Thanks for the latest shit update.
Reen B

Yeah, that puppy is stuck. Haven’t these people heard of an enema?