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Salt Lake City, UT - A robbery attempt went south after a store clerk with a crowbar tested the resolve of a perpetrator who claimed to have a gun. The wannabe robber was apprehended a short time later after a police chase by car and foot.

According to police, Michael Gagon walked into a Fresh Market gas station convenience store and demanded money after saying he had a gun in his belt. Police said, in response, the female clerk produced a crowbar and told Gagon, “You’d better be a good shot.”

With his planned robbery now presumably streaming down his leg in both liquid and… well… semi-liquid form, the suspect fled the scene in a vehicle he had reportedly carjacked from a Papa John’s delivery guy. With no other pressing business to attend to, the clerk made a note of Gagon’s vehicle and called police.

News reports said Gagon ended up on a dead end street with police in pursuit.  Police said that he abandoned the vehicle and went into a residential area on foot. Gagon is reported to have run through backyards and, in one case, through a home with the residents inside watching him go by. Run Michael! Run!

Police would eventually tackle Gagon in a backyard and now faces charges of robbery, fleeing and trespassing.

Salt Lake Police cautioned that the suspect could have grabbed the crowbar out of the store clerk’s hand and used it as a weapon. In this case, however, it sounds like that clerk-lady would have used this robber’s teeth – still in the jawbone – as a weapon on him first.

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Comments


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  • CT

    TexasRanger – what have I been telling you all along about crowbars!  Every woman should have one.  

  • OutOfBubbleGum

    Michael reached for his pocket.  “Darn it!,” he thought.  He left his smartphone at home.    Now, he wouldn’t be able to Google “what to do when clerk has crowbar.” 

    “Must run!”

  • LeaveMeBe

    LOL! The whole time I was reading this I was imagining CT (in her infamous Daphne get-up) brandishing a crow bar at the would-be robber uttering her lines in a Clint Eastwood voice. It made my morning. :)

  • Zazen

    Thanks to you CT, I now ask myself frequently ‘Do I know where my crowbar Is?’

  • CT

     If I converted one person – I feel my work is complete.

  • CT

    That is oddly exciting……

  • DangerousKindOfSnark

    Great, LMB gave you a crowbar fetish. You’re husband is going to be so surprised. ;)

  • JohnQknowitall

    Reading this headline I thought to myself what a lucky stupid bitch, but if the headline read Woman Shot In Face While Trying To Fight Off Robber I woud have thought to myself stupid bitch.

    One day or one trial of heroism is nothing compared with an eternity of dead.

  • CT

    There is a real story behind my crowbar fascination – a year or two ago, my spouse pissed me off royally because I bought an additional crowbar (we already had a few) for something I was working on.  I did not want to hear it about buying a fucking $7.00 crow bar.  All because of me my children will never go to college because I am a wasteful woman – Ahhhh (OK, I’m embellishing that part slightly).  But Texas Ranger heard about it and my threats as to what I planned to do with said crowbar if my beloved brought it up again

  • kniption

    The thought of a world where assholes can rely on the likelihood that people will roll over for them scares me a helluva lot more than the times I’ve had to put my ass on the line.

  • http://truecrimereport.com iLLusionS

    Never bring a gun to a crowbar fight! ;) And never ever bluff a bluffer! 

  • LeaveMeBe

    You’re telling me. I was flushed and panting a bit and the girl one cubicle over from me remarked that it was rather hot in our office this morning but I told her no, that it was just me.

  • Coyote

    “Gagon is reported to have run through backyards and, in one case, through a home with the residents inside watching him go by. Run Michael! Run!”

    This made me laugh as I thought of Nicholas Cage in “Raising Arizona”, running through the house with the dogs and the cops in pursuit.  What a dumbass. 

  • Sam

    I can’t think of anything sensible to type. That pic just keeps reminding me of another poster’s remark on another story about mommy having been raped by a giraffe. And that tattoo sure isn’t helping that neck look any shorter!

  • DangerousKindOfSnark

    A $7 crowbar? Good lord, send down to Camp Snark for a week, I will show him spending. :) At Camp Snark we guarantee your spouse will learn how bad it could be. 

  • DangerousKindOfSnark

    I would agree if it was her property, but shit I don’t know if I’d put my balls on the line to protect my company’s cash. In fact, I know I wouldn’t. The fact that she saved the gas station’s 400.00 til would have been cold comfort to her family if she’d taken a bullet in the skull. 

  • EveryVillainIsLemons

    I’d love to see a picture of the clerk.  It’s funny when a fuckwad like Gagon goes into an establishment believing that his potential victim is weak and helpless, only to be proven very, very wrong.

  • newstarshipsmell ™

    Hahaha, I didn’t even notice that.

  • sugarpie

    I bet the pizza delivery guy is feeling a little less masculine.

  • newstarshipsmell ™

    If the answer isn’t always “In my right hand,” then you may be doing it wrong.

  • newstarshipsmell ™

    How reasonable are your rates?

  • JohnQknowitall

    I think using a crowbar against a gun is like riding a bicycle and playing chicken with a bus: she got lucky.

  • Zazen

    It is becoming clear to me that we have to protect ourselves against the often violent progeny of humans raped by giraffes. It’s not baseless racism at ALL when we have PROOF such as this.

  • kniption

    It shouldn’t be looked at in isolation, though, DKOS.  
     
    I have never been robber.  I did work as a clerk in a liquor store while in college.  I have no doubt that if I would have handed over everything to any asshat coming through the door asking for it, all it would get me is more asshats coming through the door asking for it.  …and there is no guarantee that the next asshat won’t be more of a handful than the current asshat.  Odds are to the contrary, in fact.  
     
    By declaring quite loudly the FreshMarket convenience store to be a No Assholes Allowed Zone, this woman may have very likely saved her own life or the life of a colleague on some midnight shift in the future. 
     
    What you – and even JQkia – are saying is not lost on me; and I am not advocating resistance if resistance truly is futile.  I simply believe that the issue extends beyond any single incident.  She sent a clear message.  …and, in this case, resistance wasn’t futile.      

  • kniption

    That was exactly the scene that I was thinking of as well…

  • kniption

    Ya had to go there, didn’t ya…

  • DangerousKindOfSnark

    I only charge for basic spousal upkeep, such as food. It’s my calling to give wayward spouses some perspective. You’re boyfriend of husband will be saying “Well, she does like shoes, but she could be a Coach addicted, vacation taking, polyandrous bitch.” in no time!

  • DangerousKindOfSnark

    You have a valid point, I just don’t know if I’m that brave. We had two agents tied up and burned alive in a different office in Florida a few years back so my current plan is to fight because if someone breaks in here it’s to cause shit, because I don’t really handle money so my experience is limited. The only reason for people to get violent with an insurance agent is because the company screwed them. 

    http://www.insurancejournal.com/news/southeast/2007/12/21/85871.htm 

  • newstarshipsmell ™

    Well, I’ll keep that in mind in case I ever land me a woman, and need some friendly guidance in appreciating her better qualities…

  • JGo555

    Pussay!

  • sugarpie

    : )

  • JGo555

    YOU’RE A GUY!??? BUT BUT BUT… I thought you was a girl.

  • Califboy

     It is very easy to get a concealed weapon permit in Utah, this guy is lucky he did not choose the wrong place.

  • Califboy

     I was visiting a girlfriend as she clerked at a AM Mini Market gas station years ago, when the robber came in a stuck a  gun ig my face he was immediately in charge. I consider myself pretty tough, but the gun took over and she and me did every little thing he requested.

  • Califboy

     Man that is a sad story. :(

  • Califboy

     Group rates???? Any fondling allowed of the instructor during lessons ??

  • DangerousKindOfSnark

    Fondling without permission? I run a strict camp buddy.

  • DangerousKindOfSnark

    Find yourself a nice nerdy girl and you’ll be fine. A good DM is hard to find. :)

  • DangerousKindOfSnark

    It was pretty horrifying at the time. I felt so bad for their families.