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Baristas Terrorized By Masturbating CustomerIssaquah, WA – King County prosecutors are making sure that Samuel K. McDonough, 31, thinks long and hard about the morning of February 2 when he reportedly trapped two terrified female employees inside a BigFoot Java coffee stand using a strategy of blown kisses, masturbation, and attempted forcible entry. He was – in the vernacular of the barista – “discourteous.”

Prosecutors say that at about 8:30 a.m., McDonough purchased a drink from two female employees at the drive-up coffee stand and then asked to use the restroom inside. The women reportedly refused. The women said that – after blowing kisses at them – McDonough began masturbating. Court documents then describe McDonough approaching the door and attempting to gain entry as the ‘terrified’ women hid inside. Not realizing that well-aimed steamed milk is like kryptonite to an exposed penis, the women instead decided to turn to the police for protection.

Issaquah police arrived soon after and arrested McDonough after he was identified by the victims. McDonough reportdly told police that he acted “inappropriately” and he “shouldn’t have done it” – but did not admit to masturbating outside the coffee stand.

Police said one employee said the incident left her feeling ill and ‘overwhelmingly violated.’ The other employee told police she ‘feared for her safety,’ and added, “I’ve never been so scared in my life.”

McDonough was taken into custody and placed in a holding cell at the Issaquah Jail. Female dispatchers monitoring his holding cell noted that he also masturbated there.

McDonough was last reported to be in the King County Jail on $50,000 bail. He was due in King County Superior Court for arraignment Feb. 16. The court also imposed a no-contact order between McDonough’s hand and his penis McDonough and the two employees of BigFoot Java.

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  • http://www.dreamindemon.com Jaded

    Depending on the size of dude’s package and his choice in footwear, I would have considered it a tip. Scared….pfft.

    Oh, and another thing….RAWR!

  • Lena60

    What a creepy dumbass.In jail and pulls the same thing(no pun intended).

  • Lena60

    Even if he was a redhead and his penis had pimples on it?Sorry to spoil your fantasy.

  • http://www.dreamindemon.com Jaded

    Buzzkill.

  • Tundratot

    There was a barrista kidnapped from an Anchorage drive-through last week.  All the barristas are on edge.
     

  • Babydoll0630

    This has happened to my twin sister twice.  Once when she was working at Sonic, and the other I don’t even remember….I think just random in a parking lot or gas station.  Some real weirdos out there.  I know when I was waitressing I had breakfast shift so I was pulling up at the gas station at like 4:30 am and some guy was standing outside and started walking to my car….. I IMMEDIATELY slammed my door and locked it and flashed my lights so the attendant could see.  Then I got out of the car (b/c I always carry some form of protection) and he asked me money for gas to get to the hospital to see a relative…ya right.  It was within walking distance.  I YELLED “DON’T YOU EVER, EVER, EVER walk up to a woman’s car in the dark like that again unless you don’t want your balls to wind up shoved down your throat, walk to the damn hospital I’m gonna go get cigs and go to WORK”.  I was pretty pissed off……lol.  Because I’m not a morning person, and I needed a cigarette….LOL. 

  • Josh

    An armed penis in public can get you into a lot of trouble.

  • Sam

    Oh, you intended it alright! :)

  • Sam

    Well if they just put them out there on the edge of course some of them are going to get stolen.

  • Sam

    I’ll never forget the time when some random guy on the street showed me his package and asked for a blow job. I had braces at the time, so i just gave him my biggest, metal-glistening smile and said “sure!”. He didn’t really want to then. Spoilsport… ;)

  • Sam

    ” King County prosecutors are making sure that Samuel K. McDonough, 31, thinks long and hard”
    Is that the prosecutors’ PG way of advising McDonough he needs to invest in a penis pump and some viagra?

  • CT

    I wasn’t surprised to see this did not take place at any of the Starbucks in DC.  There are 3 within blocks of my office and the service is so bad at all three of them so that no one would ever notice if someone whipped out their dick and started jerking it.  

  • Andy P

    I don’t condone his behavior but $50,000 bail?  I’ve seen so many articles where people have a much lower bail for much worse offences.  Kind of makes me wonder how they come up with them?  I’m guessing a dart board.

  • DangerousKindOfSnark

    Well, Lena is right. It’s only sexual harassment if the guy is ugly.

  • DangerousKindOfSnark

    Barf. I only drink my coffee black and any time someone brings me one from Starbucks it always burned, every damn time I get burned coffee. I can’t imagine the epic fail of a Starbucks that is wall-to-wall customers.

  • CT

    Wall to wall – oh fuck no.  When I used to go there it would be me and maybe one other person because it was before 7:30 am.  Never failed – it would take 15 minutes to get a fucking latte and I would end up leaving being pissed and having said something snarky to one of the people working there.   I stopped because I tired of paying $5 for shitty coffee with a side of lazy ass at 7 in the morning plus I had been a bitch to enough of them that I didn’t want a lugee with my coffee. 

  • CT

     Loaded?

  • shannie

    Guy just can’t stop yankin his wanky….it’s like a compulsion…Jail sounds fun for him.

  • sugarpie

    As a rape victim, I don’t buy the “overwelmingly violated” response from the ‘victim’.  I’m sure it was a bit scarey for a time, but paleeaassee.  I would’ve given him the tiny weiner signal and laughed my ass off. 

  • JGo555

    McDonough…. All I read was Masturbation, employees, & McDONALDS. The story made complete sense to me. After all who doesn’t mind McDONALDS a sexy place to find sexy people to wax your bean pole to???

    Maybe the dude has Pesisten General Arousal Disorder… since he polished his sausage while incarcerated.

  • rensuchan

    Well played Sam, well played.

  • http://twitter.com/AngelsMom0806 Angels Mom

    Truth

  • LeaveMeBe

    “…thinks long and hard…”

    I love you kniption, you’re amazing!

    I started snort-giggling at that line and giggled my way through the entire story. Well played my man, well played!

     

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=583265939 Ithinkimbig Meech

    A person doesn’t have to touch you to invade your personal space and make you feel violated.

  • Lena60

    Its not burned DKOS, thats just how it taste. I hate star bucks.

  • XenMojo

    This totally reminds me of that little dude from Sons of Anarchy…

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Barb-Rose/100000524326833 Barb Rose

    It all depends on if the judge got laid the night b4 court

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=736546181 Michael Heldman

    So what kind of footwear should I choose for our coffee date?

  • http://www.dreamindemon.com Jaded

    Black boots and Chucks are always welcome. White sneakers or anything with velcro…that’ll get your peener stabbed.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=736546181 Michael Heldman

    So what combo allows me to stab you with my peener?

  • GGMon

    Fuck that is Brutal. High five!

  • http://www.dreamindemon.com Jaded

    Heh….I’m actually at a loss for words. Kudos.

  • startheory

    Welcome back Knip! I missed your posts :)

    This whole thing could have been avoided had they just let him wank it in their bathroom =D

  • Reen B

     $50K because imagine what his intent was if he’d have been able to get in the door…

  • malq

    fap fap fap

  • sherrdbw

    Sorry, NO! Had a lawsuit against a cute guy(manager) that thought that grabbing my vagina, squeezing it and telling me that we would make such beautiful babies together was part of his job benefits. Nevermind that I had a husband and said no many times. At least he had the stupidity to do it in front of everybody.

  • whisperswing

    Heres his pic