Good day, sickos. I want to thank all of you for your calls and emails inquiring about my well-being and offering sex at various public parks. But fear not, I am just on a much-deserved, much-needed vacation. Although I am off this week, I will be writing up some stuff off and on while finally being able to focus on some DD house cleaning. I'll also have time to respond to some of you interested in writing. In the meantime, be sure to check out the forums for the latest in terrible news.

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Miramar Beach, FL — An unidentified 48-year-old man was arrested on February 8, several weeks after a female co-worker accused him of exposing himself and handling his junk while on the job.

The woman told police that on January 22, the man had come into the office to clean the glass on a sliding door. When she went in to check on him, she found him standing there half-nekkid – peener in one hand and a camera in another. The multi-tasking handyman was apparently involved in a little hand-to-gland combat.

“I’m almost done,” the man told her. An unspecified amount of time later, he reportedly came out of the office and announced, “OK, I’m finished.”

When questioned, the man told police that he thought the woman liked him a lot. “She made me do it,” he said. “I’m not an angel.” When asked if he had recorded the act, the man told told the deputy he had already deleted the file.

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  • malq

    “The multi-tasking handyman was apparently involved in a little hand-to-gland combat.”

    LOL I had to fap repeatedly when I was done laughing. That’s a good one Jaded!
    You owe me 43minutes and 19 seconds of my life that I will never get back

  • http://www.dreamindemon.com Jaded

    Even if you had it back, you’d just waste it fappin’.

  • Anonymous

    This gives window streaks a whole new meaning

  • Anonymous

    Kill him! Kill him! But castrate the fucker first!

  • malq

    shit! you got me there. I probably would.

  • malq

    shit! you got me there. I probably would.

  • Anonymous

    This guy sounds like a serial rapist in the making. The way he blames her, the amount of projected thinking (he thought she liked him a lot) all seem pretty rapey to me. Doesn’t the profile of a serial rapist often include that the suspect would have a “menial” labor job, such as a handyman or window washer?

    Oh, and Jaded, “he was apparently involved in a little hand-to-gland combat…” You are a sick woman, which is one of the many things I treasure about you.

    So, If he was filming himself masturbating, was he planning on masturbating to it? So, he’d masturbate to his masturbating? He could webcam it and start a infinite loop of monkey spanking. A Moebius Spank, if you will.

  • Anonymous

    thanx miss ann, now i am staring at the streaks on my office window and wondering where it might have came from . . . ahh i think i will skip lunch today.

  • Anonymous

    It makes perfect sense that she would make him do it since she hired him in the first place.

  • Anonymous

    lmao @ window streaks

  • Anonymous

    Another misguided male, who believes if a woman even says hello to him, she wants to have a relationship with him. Cripe sakes! Another ass blaming a female for his jerky behavior (pun intended)