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Woman Drags Naked Man Out Of Her Home By His Beard

September 9, 2010 at 9:49 am by  

Kansas City, MO – A 64-year-old woman told police she woke up to an intruder in her bedroom at about 1:00 Tuesday morning. That intruder was her neighbor, 62-year-old Laurence Saunders. And he was *gag* butt-nekkid. Saunders reportedly grabbed the woman by the arm and told her he was “just being friendly.” The woman wrapped her hand around the man’s beard and proceeded to drag the old dude to the front door of her mobile home. Before she could throw him out on his scraggly old ass, he allegedly grabbed her by the throat and attempted to choke her. She reached out and grabbed a tape measure and knocked him in the melon two or three times. He then left of his own accord. The woman said she found the man’s shorts sitting on top of a DVD player in her living room. She picked ’em up and threw them at Saunders, who was sitting on her front porch, crying. He was arrested and booked on charges of burglary, sexual misconduct and two counts of assault. Bond has been set at $50,000. Police believe Saunders had been drinking before entering the woman’s trailer. And that wasn’t the first time he entered her home uninvited – police say he entered through an unlocked door the day before to inform her that her dog had escaped through the back door.

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