DeLand, Florida - When I was just a little Jaded, I wanted to grow up and become a cop. I dreamed of saving the world with my shiny gun and my big-ass flashlight. Now that I’m almost all grown up, I realize that I never would have made it past the first week – I would have had a run-in with the likes of the lovely Julie Hubbard and I would have totally lost my shit. The arrest report would have read, “The cracked bitch spit on my leg, and that’s when I pulled out my big-ass flashlight and lit up her insides. The end.” Julie turned what could have been a simple ticket and a fine into a sputum flinging, name calling, law enforcement officer threatening, clusterfuck.

Julie "Weird - she doesn't *look* crazy" Hubbard

Julie was stopped early Wednesday morning after making an illegal left turn. When Sgt. George Maddox made contact with the crazy lady, she “immediately became belligerent and unruly” toward him. That behavior earned her a seat in the cruiser while Maddox checked for wants and warrants. While he ran his check, Julie reportedly started spewing out death threats and racially derogatory names, Maddox is black, before hawking a loogie on his leg and stomach. Then she allegedly started going on and on about her dad being a member of the KKK and the officer “was gonna get his.” Then, the nut job purposely peed on the seat. (Yep. BigBig reviews-ass flashlight and a straw).

Now, 44-year-old Julie Hubbard is facing charges of corruption of a public servant or family by threat, battery on a law enforcement officer and obstructing an officer without violence. Bond has been set at $21,000. Oh yeah, and a parrot was removed from her vehicle.

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