Jackie Denise Knott Needed A Paperweight
October 6, 2009 by Morbid
ALBERTVILLE, Alabama - Drivers on U.S. Highway 431 saw something unusual with a fellow motorist on Wednesday morning. They saw a minivan being driven by 37-year-old Jackie Denise Knott, and on the roof of the vehicle was a cardboard box. Ok, so that’s noticeable, but not really worth anything that would be on the front page of this site, right? Right. It’s what was inside the box that had witnesses phoning police. Sitting inside the cardboard box was Knott’s 13-year-old daughter. Police quickly pulled over Knott and her explanation for her daughter sitting on the roof of her minivan were quite amazing. “The box was too large to get in the van, so more or less, she needed a paperweight,” said Albertville Police Officer Jamie Smith. Knott was arrested and charged with endangering the welfare of a child, her daughter was turned over to relatives.
Look, I’m all for not going too overboard with child safety. I mean I grew up in the ’70s and ’80s. We rode in the back of pickup trucks to play baseball, we rode our bikes with no protective gear whatsoever, my parents cars didn’t even have seatbelts, McDonalds had ashtrays on every table, we played Jarts at night…but come on, this was just fucking dumb.
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12:50 am on October 6th, 2009
Oookay. Did she ever think of breaking the box down and having the top over the back seat? What an idiot.
1:30 am on October 6th, 2009
*Blank Look*
I can’t describe the how I’m feeling so I’ll explain it in relativity. Have you ever seen those prison docu.s where they show the inguenuity of prisoners? The homemade tat guns, hot plates made from batteries and a chord and a carboard box. You know like some Mcguyver shit? Some of it is like if they had oppurtunities and chances we’re talking MIT intelligence. Well, this women conjurs the completly opposing sentiment.
7:33 am on October 6th, 2009
Full Article
I guess we know who’s the boss in that house!
7:59 am on October 6th, 2009
Jackie in the box? Way too strange.
8:36 am on October 6th, 2009
I mean they were on the interstate, it’s not like you go slow and how far were they going? Is the daughter a stunt woman? What in the hell??!!??
9:42 am on October 6th, 2009
I fixed a typo for you Morbid. Now you can’t say I don’t do anything.
You did inspire some memory flashbacks. I remember riding in that space between the back seat and the window of my parent’s Volkswagon Beetle. AND, my sister and I used to steal all the ashtrays from the McDonald’s tables and take them home. Then we would squish them into different shapes.
What can I say? We were poor, didn’t have many toys and were easily entertained.
10:04 am on October 6th, 2009
Well I don’t understand what all the fuss is about the officer clearly explained that it was “tied to the mini van by a wire clothes hanger” sounds safe to me…lmao.
10:19 am on October 6th, 2009
Thanks. That really should be a full-time position here. Fixing my spelling and grammatical errors. But in regards tot his story, this has to be one of the dumbest things I have ever heard of.
10:46 am on October 6th, 2009
I am in amazement that Jackie Denises child has made it to her teenage years, what, with her moms “mad” reasoning skills and all that common sense!! Was this the first time Jackie had ever been to town or what?
God Bless that child……
11:24 am on October 6th, 2009
I read these stories and can’t help but wonder how these children survive to whatever ages they are. I mean… this isn’t a simple laps in judgment. This is fundamental stupidity of such a degree that it’s sheer luck it hasn’t resulted in the child’s demise already.
11:29 am on October 6th, 2009
I’m still trying to figure out how you play baseball from the back of a truck.
11:32 am on October 6th, 2009
I know, right? I mean this isn’t like a dumb decision regarding a parent letting their kid hang on the the back of the car while they are on a skateboard. I mean, this was just so fucking DUMB I am still chuckling over it. There was absolutely nothing…I mean NOTHING…smart about this decision.
2:50 pm on October 6th, 2009
More hillbillys! OMG!
2:51 pm on October 6th, 2009
This site may have ben ruining my day since ‘04 but it makes me feel like a better person when I read this shit!
3:18 pm on October 6th, 2009
The mental image of this makes me giggle.
Living in small town OK, I’ve seen some dumbass shit, but this is a whole new level.
7:15 am on November 5th, 2009
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