Luis Rodriguez Is A Sneaky Sicko
August 23, 2009 by Jaded
Long Branch, NJ – Way back in the old days, when I was just an itty bitty Jaded, I had my very own boogeyman. My boogeyman stood 7-8 feet tall, had greasy green hair, a ginormous mouth filled with pointy teeth and an over-sized tongue, breath that smelled like compost, long yellow fingernails, and glowing yellow eyes. I named him Bob. When Bob wasn’t hanging out watching me from my closet, he laid under my bed – waiting for my kid-sized bladder to wake me in the middle of the night so he could nibble on my tiny toes the instant they hit the floor. It took me quite some time, and a few sleepless bladder-filled nights, to realize that Bob the BoogeymanBoogeyman reviews
was just a figment of my overactive imagination. As an adult, I now know the boogeyman is for real. Today’s boogeymen may not look terrifying and larger than life, the fact that they look like normal human beings is what makes them so scary. Take Luis Rodriguez for instance. He looks normal enough – notice the lack of greasy green hair and glowing yellow eyes. He may not be into nibblin’ toes, but he is into piddlin’ kiddos.
Luiz Rodriguez
A little over a week ago, in the early morning hours, the slimy bastard slithered his way into a young girl’s bedroom window. The child’s alert father heard a strange noise coming from her bedroom at about 4:00 a.m. and investigated. When he opened the bedroom door, he saw Luisluis reviews laying in the bed next to his 12-year-old daughter, with his hand over her mouth, silencing her. Needless to say, dad got a bit peeved and went after Luis. While dad was wresting with the perv, the kiddo was on the phone with the cops. Dad ended up with a bloody nose and Luis ended up with a set of cuffs and a ride to the pokey. According to the criminal complaint, Luis touched the girl inappropriately and threatened to kill her if she screamed. Thankfully, dad put a stop to the pervy shenanigans before they could escalate.
Seems Luis was a busy man that morning. Later that same day, a woman reported to officers that at about 2:oo that morning, she awoke to find Luis in her bedroom committing a lewd act. When she asked him what the hell he was doing, he replied, “I love you.” The woman told officers that Luis was her former neighbor and that they had never been in any sort of relationship. When she escorted Luis out of her home, she discovered that he had entered through her kitchen window. Luis Rodriguez, 40, is now facing charges of aggravated assault, burglary, and aggravated sex assault on a victim younger than 13. Bail has been set at $521,000. Had that vile boogeyman appeared in my daughter’s room, he’d still be in the hospital having his junk surgically removed from his eye sockets.
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7:34 am on August 23rd, 2009
If I was that girl’s father, I wouldn’t have wrestled with the guy. I would taken a Baseball bat to his brain-pan.
8:03 am on August 23rd, 2009
That former neighbour of his must be pretty freaked out, too. What did he expect her to say when she awoke to discover him in her room in the dead of night, committing a lewd act, no less?
“I love you.”
“Oh, alright then, get in the bed.”
or maybe even
“What took you so long?”
I am, in fact, quite impressed that she was able to escort him out of her home without any altercation; but I bet she wishes she had called the police immediately now.
2:46 pm on August 23rd, 2009
If it had been my daughter, I would have killed him.
5:00 pm on August 23rd, 2009
If this woman had done the responsible thing (call the cops when someone breaks into your house in the middle of the night for pervy purposes), the 12 year old would not have been victimized.
WTF was she thinking?
5:46 pm on August 23rd, 2009
Meeee Toooooo! I don’t get it. He’da liked to get shot, sneakin’ into homes like that. Obviously he’s been doin’ this for some time to feel like he wouldn’t get caught. Then she just made him even more comfortable by lettin’ him walk out after getting caught.
PS. If I was that father this creep would have gotten it with the bat that I theoretically keep by my bedside…
10:40 pm on August 23rd, 2009
Let us not forget there is H.O.P.E. Helping Other People Everyday
BUBBA’s gonna help him toss his salad!
9:08 am on August 24th, 2009
Speaking of boogeymen…when I was visiting my cousin in Illinois, he told us a local legend about some kind of creature that stole kids at night by jumping from rooftop to rooftop. All these years later, I still remember the story but not sure if this was a regional thing like Rawhide and Bloody Bones. Anyone have any clue what this legend was, or could it simply be he was making it up as he went along?
10:03 am on August 24th, 2009
Not sure Morbid, sorry never heard that. I will tell ya I still keep my toes covered at night. I just can’t get over that
Anyway good for Dad going to investigate, but damn this girl will probably be scarred for life.
12:13 pm on August 24th, 2009
Actually he does look terrifying
3:19 am on August 25th, 2009
re: Morbid, the only things I know that go roof from roof are SpringHeel Jack/Jersey Devil.
7:46 am on August 25th, 2009
I think ny cousin took Springheel Jack and mixed him with a Sleestack from Land of the Lost.
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