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A family is on the mends after suffering the mental anguish of a stillborn baby. After coming through the event a bit battle scarred, Kate and John Coleman decide that it is time for them to devote the love they were to give the daughter that died in the womb, to another little girl who they feel deserves it. After shopping around the local orphanage, they settle on a strange little girl named Esther. Polite, articulate, and extremely mature for her age – Esther is different from her peers and the couple feel she would fit in perfect with them and their two kids. But quicker than you can say The Good Son, Esther’s true colors begin to show as she begins acting out a devious plan, a plan that begins with the dismantling of her new family.

As many of you know by now, the “killer kid” genre of horror flick really gets my blood pumping to all the right places. So it was with a little excitement I went to see Orphan, hoping that there may be a chance of me seeing yet another killer kid film to mention alongside Who Can Kill A Child? and The Children. I wasn’t actually expecting it be as good as those two films, even though it definitely seemed to have all the ingredients I look for; creepy kid,  clueless adults, and my favorite environment in a horror film – snow. In regards to Esther, played to the creepy hilt by Isabelle Fuhrman, I was not let down. Esther is a ruthless and delightfully cold-hearted girl, it’s just too bad she had to star in this film.

Review: Orphan   Theres Something Wrong With This MovieThe problem comes directly from the stupidity of all the adults around her. When it comes to kids killing people in film, it is standard to have the adults not wanting to believe what is happening – to not jump directly to the conclusion that their sweet 9-year-old daughter is running amok intentionally pushing her peers off of playground equipment. But there is a right way and a wrong way to do it. In Orphan, Jaume Collet-Serra (Waxworks) sticks with the wrong way – following David Johnson and Alex Mace’s story that simply populates the film with adults who are borderline retarded.

No matter what Esther says, or who gets hurt, no matter how many paths of blame lead straight to Esther, no one can believe she is the culprit. The couple’s two children are the first to see Esther for what she is but can be forgiven for not doing anything about it. Kids are dumb and easily manipulated. But the adults, in particular Kate’s (Vera Farmiga) husband John (Peter Sarsgaard) is so goddamn dumb it was almost infuriating. Throughout the movie, he continues to shove his big, dumb head is so far up his own ass, that it eventually pops back out of his big, dumb neck.

But he isn’t the only braindead character in the film – just one of the worst. Others include the mother-in-law, the orphanage, the head nun that oversees Esther’s adoption and even the cops.  All having the mentality slightly above a log. Even when Kate does catch on, she consistently makes decisions and performs actions that do more to hurt the family than it does to protect them, all leading to the “twist” most people figured out watching the trailer and a finale that was disappointing in not only its execution but for also using a tired, unimaginative cliche often employed in films like this. A cliche that’s like the villains they are used on. Neither knowing when to die.

So now that you know all that I felt Orphan did wrong, is there anything I would recommend? Sure. Again, Isabelle Fuhrman, does a great job. Any scenes she is in are pretty good. She comes off as genuinely charming and equally creepy. When she turns sinister, it is fairly believable. When abandoning manipulation and deciding to attack, whether that attack be mental or physical, Esther doesn’t play any games. She goes right for the throat. There were some ripples of nervous laughter from the audience I was with in response to some of her actions. While Orphan never pushes the boundaries of its R rating, it does earn it. From a pretty disturbing child birth scene at the beginning, to some of Esther’s extra-curricular activities that included holding a box cutter to a boys dick, a fairly violent hammer attack, and a scene ripped from the fantasies of pedophiles everywhere – the attempted seduction of a grown man.

Unfortunately, Orphan is never violent or gory enough for anyone looking for that type of thing, and the story, along with the characters, are too dumb for the movie to be an effective psychological thriller. So while Orphan may not have been the film I was hoping it to be, the character of Esther was. She may have been waiting for a family as stupid as the Coleman’s, but I wish I could have seen her work her expert manipulative skills on a tad smarter group of adults. I think that would have made for a much more effective film. There is a point late in the Orphan when an exasperated Kate tells her husband that she is tired of connecting all the dots for him, and by that time, so was I.

Rating: Review: Orphan   Theres Something Wrong With This MovieReview: Orphan   Theres Something Wrong With This MovieReview: Orphan   Theres Something Wrong With This MovieReview: Orphan   Theres Something Wrong With This MovieReview: Orphan   Theres Something Wrong With This Movie

Review: Orphan   Theres Something Wrong With This Movie
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  • cassidymarie83

    Damn, damn, damn. I couldn’t wait to see this movie, now I’m not sure it’s all I was thinking it would be, Oh well…thanks for the review.

  • http://www.dreamindemon.com Morbid

    Hey, if anything, go see it for Isabelle Furhman. She is amazing and one to watch out for. Just be prepared to want to reach through the screen and slap all the adults silly.

  • cassidymarie83

    Yeah I’m thinking I’d still like to see it, but hate being disappointed in movies due to the writers stupidity…kinda like the classic girl in movies where your screaming at her to FUCKING RUN AWAY and she still walks into the house. Seems like this movie is full of that kinda stuff. But from the first trailer that little girl looked creepy and made me want to see it. Hey maybe she’ll stick around and be cast in one of the upcoming saws…

  • http://www.dreamindemon.com So Jaded

    The previews looked great, and I really wanted to catch this one…but I do believe I’m gonna pass. This particular review seems to echo what some of my friends are saying about the flick.

  • Aslan

    Like the others I too was looking forward to seeing it. There aren’t enough truly creepy thrillers out there these days. Sigh, oh well. I’ll catch it when it hits dvd. Glad the little girl is great, sorry that the surroundings fall flat.

  • zpf

    Furhman does an excellent job as Esther. She is one of the creepiest kids I’ve seen. The rest of the characters only leave you with a hope that most of humanity isn’t as stupid as they are. If you could pluck Esther out and drop her in a well written script with adults that don’t stand around like drooling idiots, then you could have a real psycho-thriller movie on your hands. Esther definitely puts the ‘psycho’ in psychopath.

    Otherwise, feh.

  • http://www.dreamindemon.com Morbid

    If you could pluck Esther out and drop her in a well written script with adults that don’t stand around like drooling idiots, then you could have a real psycho-thriller movie on your hands.

    Exactly

  • mjmsepm

    I really want to see this one… Isabelle Fuhrman looks like she makes the whole movie worth while. When I first saw the trailer on tv I thought it was another form of the Good son just with a daughter this time. There is another movie that I cant remember the name of that has a sadistic lil girl trying to eliminate her adopted mothers child.

  • mommacrazy30

    theheheh…jon and kate does ester=+8?

  • cassidymarie83

    I should recommend the movie “Joshua” for those of you that like this type of “crazy kid” movie. I won’t write too much about it but it is decent and the adults are very aware throughout the movie which makes it a little easier to watch.

  • http://www.dreamindemon.com Morbid

    Keep this tag bookmarked:
    http://www.dreamindemon.com/tag/killer-kid/

    Before long, I will have them all reviewed

  • sunshine012

    This is the new century” Damien The Omen”. Whatever the name of that movie was. I watch the commercials for this movie and it creeps me out.

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