Unamused
1:25 am on July 10th, 2009
*rofl* Great write up TG. Maybe the dildo just made the John Gonzales feel inadequate.
sheevaa
4:32 am on July 10th, 2009
My effort not to laugh my ass off, well, it didn’t succeed. No stabby? Decapitations? Child molestation? Wow! Much more pleasant than the normal people-shit we get on here!
nadine
5:45 am on July 10th, 2009
Hey she wanted some and that is that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Lazlo
8:23 am on July 10th, 2009
I’d be willing to pay good money for that kind of treatment
Wuss!
MadeaBecBec
8:36 am on July 10th, 2009
*snicker* Thanks thinkgoat, funny and imaginative! I wonder. Did the PoPo confiscate the “weapon” involved in this “crime”???? *snicker*
thinkgoat
9:11 am on July 10th, 2009
I simply can’t believe you people…laughing at poor John and Kimberly. I was completely mortified by this story.
Did the PoPo confiscate the “weapon” involved in this “crime”????
That’s a good question. I wonder if she threw it out of the window? Maybe they had a sketch artist draw up a “likeness” and they distributed it throughout the neighborhood watch program.
Wolf_of_Mars
9:52 am on July 10th, 2009
Good thing he didn’t give in to her other sexual urges. He may have been the one arrested. The charge? … Having a dangerous person on his weapon, of course!
CassieMomma
11:46 am on July 10th, 2009
Did the PoPo confiscate the “weapon” involved in this “crime”???? *snicker*
That shit would of bagged into evidence with a long stick and double layer of rubber gloves….ewwwww and yes btw this story made me laugh out loud, hee hee!
prettyuglyish
1:27 pm on July 10th, 2009
I’d be willing to pay good money for that kind of treatment
I take straight cash or Ben & Jerry’s Coffee Heath Bar Crunch ice cream.
jennifer
2:50 pm on July 10th, 2009
You know, lately, my husband has been pissing me off alot too. I have a glass on one. HMMM
Veronica
2:52 pm on July 10th, 2009
Not that I condone non-consensual dildo-poking, but this guy is a fucking loser. Calling the cops over that crap? What a pussy. Why do I get the feeling this guy would have done the same to her in a heartbeat? Or something similar…
Athena
3:09 pm on July 10th, 2009
Actually, I’ve got to disagree with the sentiment in this thread. “Reverse” domestic violence (for lack of a better word) is hugely underreported, even though statistics show that women are more likely to be physically abusive than men (although, they cause less damage, obviously), specifically because men fear the social repercussions.
This poor guy is in a lose-lose-lose situation. If he calls the cops, he’s a “pussy”. If he lets it slide, she’ll get physical again. If hits her back, he’ll go to jail.
Fuck that shit. Nothing pisses me off more than women being abusive because they think they can get away with it… and it happens ALL the time. Let a man assault YOU with a sex toy and see if you just suck it up.
Veronica
3:17 pm on July 10th, 2009
Actually, I’ve got to disagree with the sentiment in this thread. “Reverse” domestic violence (for lack of a better word) is hugely underreported, even though statistics show that women are more likely to be physically abusive than men (although, they cause less damage, obviously), specifically because men fear the social repercussions.
This poor guy is in a lose-lose-lose situation. If he calls the cops, he’s a “pussy”. If he lets it slide, she’ll get physical again. If hits her back, he’ll go to jail.
Fuck that shit. Nothing pisses me off more than women being abusive because they think they can get away with it… and it happens ALL the time. Let a man assault YOU with a sex toy and see if you just suck it up.
I think that in my case at least, you may have misunderstood — My issue is that I don’t buy dildo-poking as actual abuse. I could be wrong, but my instinct tells me this guy was not truly worried for his safety. The story says “poking,” in my book that doesn’t necessarily equal assault. I just don’t see anything in this story to indicate that this is a classic abuse situation, which admittedly women are often responsible for. That’s not the point I was making. I would have said the same thing if the situation had been reversed, with the man doing the “poking.”
I still say this guy is a loser. My loser alarm is going off big time, but NOT because he is a man accusing a woman of assault. Like I said, I could be wrong, but…meh.
Athena
3:31 pm on July 10th, 2009
Fair enough. I did misunderstand. That said, I would contend that it’s the dude’s groin, where even mere “pokes” can be the stuff of nightmares.
thinkgoat
3:40 pm on July 10th, 2009
Actually, I’ve got to disagree with the sentiment in this thread. “Reverse” domestic violence (for lack of a better word) is hugely underreported, even though statistics show that women are more likely to be physically abusive than men (although, they cause less damage, obviously), specifically because men fear the social repercussions.
Actually, I agree with that 100%. I worked in a “Women’s Crisis Center” for a while – they changed the name due to the influx of abuse to men.
Regarding this story. No penetration, just “poking” at his groin. Hell, I’ve walked out of many stupid “sex toy” parties because I couldn’t stand to watch a bunch of adults (?) play “pass the dildo” not using hands. People getting poked all over the place, even unsuspecting new arrivals. Kimberly didn’t beat him stupid, she didn’t rape him with it. IMO he was just reacting to her drunken stupidity in the one way to get her to STFU and leave him alone. He called 911 and reported she poked him in the groin several times with a pink sex toy. Had it been her calling 911 to report John poking her in the groin several times, it still would have been drunken stupidity and I still would have found humor in the situation.
ecvmanzo
4:18 pm on July 10th, 2009
LMAO…It takes all kinds.
The Masked Web Avenger
4:21 pm on July 10th, 2009
If anyone pokes me in my groin I’m going to poke them in the eye with my fist. The police took her to jail and they don’t like doing arrest paper work for shits and giggles. When someone ask you to stop touching them and you don’t, its battery, it doesn’t matter if they are using a fucking french fry. It is funny that she got arrested for doing something with a dildo but calling the guy a loser for doing exactly what the police advice people in domestic abuse situations to do is fucking lame. She was drunk and what might have started as poking could easily escalate to worse. The story is funny and well written but the comments are telling of the double standard that is rampant in society.
Veronica
4:33 pm on July 10th, 2009
If anyone pokes me in my groin I’m going to poke them in the eye with my fist. The police took her to jail and they don’t like doing arrest paper work for shits and giggles. When someone ask you to stop touching them and you don’t, its battery, it doesn’t matter if they are using a fucking french fry. It is funny that she got arrested for doing something with a dildo but calling the guy a loser for doing exactly what the police advice people in domestic abuse situations to do is fucking lame. She was drunk and what might have started as poking could easily escalate to worse. The story is funny and well written but the comments are telling of the double standard that is rampant in society.
Well, I think I already did a perfectly adequate job of explaining that I wasn’t speaking from a double standard, just calling bullshit on this particular guy’s claims. As has been said repeatedly, we are free to speculate all we want on DD. My bullshit detector went off. Yours didn’t. That’s fine, but don’t assume anyone who calls this guy a loser holds abusive women to a different standard in general. My view is almost exactly that of thinkgoat’s as to why I don’t feel this is indicative of what abused men go through in general.
The Masked Web Avenger
4:57 pm on July 10th, 2009
I hope I didn’t come across as attacking you personally Veronica as that wasn’t my intention, and my crappy work day may have made me lash out a bit. If you have ever been injured in your, um … man bits (if you have them), your likely to be sensitive to the lack of empathy. Being poked is enough to really hurt us down there. Shit I sit down wrong every once and a now again and it might as well be “The Passion of the Christ” for about 5 minuets, and thats just from sitting on them. Just talking about it is making my all nervous. I really do think if someone asks you not to touch them though, regardless of circumstance you should be arrested if you continue to touch them.
Veronica
5:45 pm on July 10th, 2009
I hope I didn’t come across as attacking you personally Veronica as that wasn’t my intention, and my crappy work day may have made me lash out a bit. If you have ever been injured in your, um … man bits (if you have them), your likely to be sensitive to the lack of empathy. Being poked is enough to really hurt us down there. Shit I sit down wrong every once and a now again and it might as well be “The Passion of the Christ” for about 5 minuets, and thats just from sitting on them. Just talking about it is making my all nervous. I really do think if someone asks you not to touch them though, regardless of circumstance you should be arrested if you continue to touch them.
Oh, don’t mention it…my husband has tried to explain to me what being hit in the balls feels like but he says I’ll never truly understand the horrible, horrible pain, so I see where you’re coming from! I just got the impression that these were a couple of drunk idiots and one drunk idiot decided to show her drunken idiotness by harassing the other with a dildo, and the other drunken idiot responded by calling the cops to “get back” at her. Like I said, I could be wrong, but these two both strike me as real pieces of work, if you know what I mean…lol.
thinkgoat
6:36 pm on July 10th, 2009
2nd mugshot just released today! LMAO

thinkgoat
6:43 pm on July 10th, 2009
Oops, sorry! 2nd source under story has it posted.
thinkgoat
6:52 pm on July 10th, 2009
mommacrazy30
6:54 pm on July 10th, 2009
If anyone pokes me in my groin I’m going to poke them in the eye with my fist. The police took her to jail and they don’t like doing arrest paper work for shits and giggles. When someone ask you to stop touching them and you don’t, its battery, it doesn’t matter if they are using a fucking french fry. It is funny that she got arrested for doing something with a dildo but calling the guy a loser for doing exactly what the police advice people in domestic abuse situations to do is fucking lame. She was drunk and what might have started as poking could easily escalate to worse. The story is funny and well written but the comments are telling of the double standard that is rampant in society.
i have to agree (and not because i want a dental discount)..if he were the drunk one and she wanted to go to bed and he started poking her crotch with a dildo…you get where i’m coming from here…
i also have to wonder how she thought that would get him in the mood???
Athena
6:55 pm on July 10th, 2009
LOVE the smile. Looks like she might actually have most of her teeth! That was a bet I wouldn’t have taken when her mouth was closed.
malq
2:59 am on July 11th, 2009
ROFLMOA!
I will take the talking vagina. Reminds me of a movie called chatterbox. lol I know you are googling it.

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