Speaking Of Stoopid…
April 17, 2009 by Jaded
James Williams
Racine, Wisconsin–James Williams is a real piece of work. He faked his own kidnapping, scared the crap out of his mother with ransom demands, and made himself look like a total ass. And for what reason? He didn’t want to get in trouble with his parents for having the car out late. Did I mention he’s 23-fucking-years-old?
James’ mother received the first text message around 9:00 p.m. Monday evening. It said something along the lines of, ‘We have your son. If you don’t cough up $250, he may die.’ (Wait…what? 250 bucks?) The kidnappers demanded that the ransom money be wired Western Union to a Wal-Mart in Milwaukee. The woman wasn’t sure what to think. ‘I didn’t know if it was fake or not. First thing I did is call the police,’ she said. The only thing left for her to do was pray for her son’s safety.
The text messages kept coming in…‘We need the money, we might hurt him.’ ‘He’s being beaten.’ ‘We’re going to steal your van.’ ‘We’re gonna shoot him.’ ‘Don’t contact the police.’ And on, and on. Meanwhile, the police put a trace on James’ phone, where the text messages had come from. They tracked it to momma’s van, parked in a parking lot, James asleep inside. No kidnappers, no beatings, nothing.
After being questioned, James admitted to making up the kidnapping. He was scared that his parents were going to be pissed off because he hadn’t returned the family van when he was supposed to. James’ mother says he was supposed to bring the van back earlier, but she still believes her son. She says he could have been coerced into sending those text messages. He could have been drugged and she doesn’t believe he acted on his own. ‘My son is not a criminal.’
I’m afraid he is, mom. Not only is James being charged with making false statements about a kidnapping and disorderly conduct, he is in violation of the terms of his probation on an earlier conviction of forgery and fraud. If convicted, James could spend 12 years in jail. He’s being held on $5,000 bond.
James…seriously? You are so grounded! And no dinner for you, young man!
MichaelJCheaney is covering this idiot in the forums. Thanks, MJC!
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5:23 am on April 17th, 2009
Yeah, James…. seriously? What a hoot!
5:39 am on April 17th, 2009
lol the mom still believes him? Oh dear.
7:00 am on April 17th, 2009
James, go stand in the fucking corner! Jesus fuck this guy seems to be having trouble growing the fuck up. How ignorant!
7:29 am on April 17th, 2009
LOL @James…seriously? You are so grounded! And no dinner for you, young man!
8:29 am on April 17th, 2009
He probably needed the ransom to fulfill his dream of running away from home to join the circus.
8:39 am on April 17th, 2009
Yayuh, that!!!
Oh! In Jimbos mugshot, he seems to be saying “What, you don’t believe me? I wouldn’t fake out my own Momma! Oh and please don’t tell her ’bout my previous fraud convictions, she never needs to know”
It’s a wonder Momma didn’t have a heart attack!
8:47 am on April 17th, 2009
$250 he isn’t worth much huh? That would get him 2 nights at a Holiday Inn and a couple panormous pizzas. What fun.
Can’t you see the FBI on this case? LOL
8:57 am on April 17th, 2009
Really, does his mom think he not a criminal with charges pending, plssss.
9:28 am on April 17th, 2009
Hahaha, $250! That’s one hefty ransom. At least he put a reasonable price on his fairly worthless life. Personally, I wouldn’t even cough up 25¢ for this jackass, but as is evidenced by his mother’s inability to accept the truth about him, sometimes there is just no accounting for a mother’s love.
9:55 am on April 17th, 2009
I think this whole family has a couple of screws loose!
Funny! James you jerkoff!
10:01 am on April 17th, 2009
James’ mother says he was supposed to bring the van back earlier, but she still believes her son. She says he could have been coerced into sending those text messages. He could have been drugged and she doesn’t believe he acted on his own. ‘My son is not a criminal.’
Geeze. No wonder he’s such a fuck-up. She enables his stupidity. Cut the apron strings and let the guy grow up, Mama. He’s fucking 23 and old enough to take responsibility for his own actions.
10:34 am on April 17th, 2009
stop it! y’all know that the pending charges are bogus…..
1:03 pm on April 17th, 2009
Mom is clearly delusional and junior is a first class fuckwit. Didn’t want to get in trouble for being out late with the family van? Bwaaaaaaaa haaaaaaaaaaaaa haaaaaaaaaa.
1:12 pm on April 17th, 2009
He must not watch much TV. They ALWAYS call the cops! Geesh! Dumbass! LOL
Poor mom – she is soooooo clueless.
1:18 pm on April 17th, 2009
LMAO….james, james, james…you little horse’s patoot….playin hide and seek with mamma…..LMAO…i have ALOT of kids and thought i had heard it all when it came to breaking curfew but little james here wins hands down!!!! i’m telling you…i would probably have been laughing so hard when the first text came through that i would have been on face book ….letting the family know how creative james has become. OMG…i can’t stop laughing!!!!!!!!!
1:26 pm on April 17th, 2009
mamma as she gets james his 3rd bowl of ice cream: “were they mean to you james????you look thinner!!!!”
james: “mmmmhmmmm mamma…i was sooooo scared.”
1:36 pm on April 17th, 2009
Egads, what a moron! His mom isn’t any smarter, I hate to say.
Did he never watch any of the after-school specials when he was a kid? Everyone knows that, yeah, you’ll get in trouble for not coming home on time. But, if you attempt to cover it up with a lie, you’ll get into more trouble. The more elaborate the lie, the bigger the trouble. That’s just how it goes. The dummy should have just brought the van home, owned up to his mistake and learned from it. Instead, he wasted valuable resources that could have been used to search for real kidnap victims. Jackass.
2:25 pm on April 17th, 2009
3:59 pm on April 17th, 2009
I LOL’d.
4:47 pm on April 17th, 2009
5:36 pm on April 17th, 2009
yeah, he looks stupid…do they show a picture of his mom? maybe I should watch the video.
6:07 pm on April 17th, 2009
OK, I’ve gotta say it. The last parents that believed their child when they made up outlandish stories as to where they were and why they weren’t home, buried their grandchild. WTF is wrong with these parents?
It’s no wonder the dumbass thought he could pull it off since Momma is so damn gullible.
Too bad she called the po-po.
7:07 pm on April 17th, 2009
She doesn’t belive what she’s saying. She knows. Knows who he is, even. And given this was all over having the car out to late, I’m guessing this isn’t a family that takes shit and run around from him. She just has to lie to cover for him, because he’s facing *real* time for parole violation over juvenile stupidity he thought was going to stay in the family. So unless she’d rather be subjected to all the indignities of visiting her son in prison every other weekend for the next freaking decade – of course she’s going to lie to try to mitigate the damage. And I don’t blame her for it – it’s not as though he’s hurt anyone (but perhaps her) with this latest nonsense.
10:05 pm on April 17th, 2009
“They’re all gonna laugh at you.”
– Carrie’s mama
8:43 am on April 19th, 2009
LOL
I blame the OBGYN for being a little too happy with the forceps upon birth.
Look at that head in the first pic. Conehead?
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