Lyndel Toppin Has It Rough
April 4, 2009 by Jaded
Lyndel Toppin
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania–You think you have problems? Pffft…your problems aren’t nearly as extreme as Lyndel Toppin’s problems. This guy has it rough. As a matter of fact, this story may be too graphic for some. If you feel you can tough it out, it may forever change your life.
Toppin’s fiancee, after preparing him a meatball sandwich for dinner, actually had the nerve to place the cheese on said sandwich, in the wrong place. The horror of it all!!!
Toppin became enraged because the cheese placement on the hoagie roll was all wrong. In his anger, he grabbed a knife and attacked his fiancee, slashing her finger and causing a deep laceration. That wasn’t enough to prove his displeasure at her shortcomings in the fine art of sandwich making; he also bit her. He chomped onto her wrist and wouldn’t let go. Point taken, Toppin.
Lyndel Toppin, 50, was arrested and charged with aggravated and simple assault, reckless endangerment, possessing an instrument of crime and harassment. Had I been in the shoes of the fiancee, Toppin would have needed a visit to the ER to remove one meatball sub, sans cheese, out of his rectum. Asshole…
The victim required 23 stitches to close the knife wound in her finger and may need surgery for ligament damage. Her wrist has bite marks and swelling.
Special2bme has this one up in the forums.
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2:30 pm on April 4th, 2009
I bet this isn’t the first time she was assaulted over something stupid.
I agree!
2:49 pm on April 4th, 2009
Someone has some anger issues..maybe he is mad because he only has half eyebrows?
2:51 pm on April 4th, 2009
Edit?
He’s lucky he isn’t my fiancee. He’d be wearin’ that sub all over his smugly face!
3:07 pm on April 4th, 2009
I do hope she’s not still his fiancée. If I had been her, the knife AND the sub would need extracting from his ass. Prick.
3:09 pm on April 4th, 2009
That is too fucking funny and so agree!
I would have thrown it in his fucking face, and bit his ass back and I can bite pretty damn hard. FUCKTARD!
3:22 pm on April 4th, 2009
Fixed! Thank you!
3:27 pm on April 4th, 2009
Welcome. After Morbid’s little *rant* earlier about no one pointing out a misspelling, I kinda figured you might want to know.
Great story, btw.
3:33 pm on April 4th, 2009
Everyone knows the cheese goes on TOPPIN!
Sorry, couldn’t resist!
3:48 pm on April 4th, 2009
” . . . Bitch, PLEASE! I KNOW you jus din’t put this motherfuckin’ cheez like this . . . I knows you knows that. the. motherfuckin’ cheez don’t go like this . . . oh, you don’t know? . . . well you goan know bitch . . . ”
Let’s start a pool on whether she bails him out?
5:18 pm on April 4th, 2009
ain’ dat da troof!
5:29 pm on April 4th, 2009
I Pray that this is the one that makes her see the light and get away while she can. Being a survivor (barely) of domestic abuse I can promise you it does not seem as Black and White regarding leaving when this is happening to you.
I know that may be hard to believe but believe me It is not and if you would like more about it I am happy to share experiences to help you understand just how hard it is to believe you can get away safely and live a life without this man After having him tell you that you will never ever be safe without him or have anything without him etc.
Yea i know seems silly we would think that any of this was right when we are being beaten daily but silly us we believe the person
I only Hope to God they have some counseling in place through the hospital and Police Station to help get her help in seeing this can and will lead to her death in time.
and that she pays attention and takes it to heart.
As for this ugly bastard i pray he ends up in a cell with a con who spent his childhood watching his own mother beaten and he flashbacks on this jackass and beats the hell out of him while he sleeps each night
5:32 pm on April 4th, 2009
SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!!!!!!! HA!
7:15 pm on April 4th, 2009
she could have stapled the cheese to his forehead to hide that.
now I know what happened to buckwheat-he’s gone mental and changed his name to Lyndel
7:57 pm on April 4th, 2009
Hell, I can’t top that!!
9:08 pm on April 4th, 2009
It seems that he attacked her with a knife so it should be attempted murder,sadly if she stays with him it probably will be and then some !
I bet he wouldn’t go into a biker bar and behave this way over a piece of cheese.
COWARD !!
9:11 pm on April 4th, 2009
He sure does look mean as hell too.
11:50 pm on April 4th, 2009
Say “CHEESE!”
1:42 pm on April 5th, 2009
LoL, thats funny, Too bad she didnt have a George Forman panini maker, she could have put his ugly ass head in it and done it the right way, Only thing to decide was if you wanted to leave grill marks.
1:20 am on April 6th, 2009
The grill marks would be a serious improvement, methinks! Aahh, a face only a mother could love, or maybe not, that could be why Lyndel “Asshat” Toppin has anger issues with his woman!
Please God, don’t let them have children!!!
7:33 am on April 6th, 2009
No wire……hangars, EVER!
2:13 pm on April 6th, 2009
There goes the coffee on the monitor again…lmao
That is a face I would NEVER want to see in a dark alley! Gives me shivers
2:59 pm on April 6th, 2009
It’s his eyes……..and his half eyebrows……hee hee! Really it is his eyes though.
3:22 pm on April 6th, 2009
“Show me the cheese. I said show me the fuckin’ cheese, byatch.”
You wouldn’t see his face in a DARK alley….bwahahahahahahaha.
**Oh, jeez, did I just say that?**
7:26 pm on April 6th, 2009
meatBALL HOAGIE lovers are real popular in the big house…he might get lucky and get his mouth stuffed with one without that from-unda cheese…GAG
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