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Happy April Fools Day! Heres Your Fool!

Memphis, TN- I have never tried any brand of Kentucky Bourbon. Now, after reading about 46-year old Karen Sims and her crazy-assed drunk display on March 25, 2009, I think my lightweight ass will stick with beer. I know this is not one of the usual crimes we front page here on the Dreamin’ Demon, but being it is April 1, I thought the story of a drunk fool would be appropriate.

A couple days ago, James Chambers said he noticed a strange woman walking in a very peculiar way with something in her hand. He said it could have been a bottle, but was unsure. He thought maybe the woman just “had problems“.

Several other neighbors have stated that the 46-year old woman, Karen Sims, had given them problems before, but nothing like this. Alvaro Pacheco and Gonzalo Tocarruncho said they’ve had trouble in the backyard each night and things have been disappearing.  Last Wednesday, Sims ignored (or was too sloshed to take notice of) the ‘No Trespassing’ signs, and stumbled her way into their backyard. For hours she staggered around their yard and begged them for money to buy more booze. These two guys must be very patient or completely starved for entertainment because I would not have put up with this drunken damsel’s distress calls for more than an hour. I would of videotaped what I could and spent the rest of that time sending it to friends and uploading it on YouTube.

After the men grew tired of the lush’s drunken demands, Tocarruncho asked her to leave. Sims must of misheard his request because she removed her shirt. When Tocarruncho told her he called the police, Sims gave him another eerie eyeful by removing her pants. Damn. Now I see why I need to have more patience. I would have missed the entire strip-tease of this tanked-up tootsie and that would have caused a much lower view count on YouTube.

“She drank too much and she off up her clothes,” said Pacheco with a nervous grin. “She is crazy. She needs a hospital or jail, I don’t know which.” I don’t know either, but I do hope she gets the help she obviously needs.

When police arrived, they found Sims staggering around Tocarruncho’s backyard stark naked and holding a nearly empty bottle of Kentucky Bourbon. When the drunken diva finally noticed the officers, she became belligerent and began cursing loudly. She screamed at the officers and refused to obey their commands.

Karen Sims, who lives down the street, was arrested and charged with trespassing, disorderly conduct, public indecency and public intoxication. Police stated this is not the first time Sims has been arrested.

So all of you can get a proper visual of the drunk and naked nuisance, here  is the mugshot of Ms. Karen Sims. Happy April Fool’s Day, Demonites!

Happy April Fools Day! Heres Your Fool!

I’m guessing that if Alvaro Pacheco and Gonzalo Tocarruncho were not drinking men before, they are now. *shudder*

Thanks to Tazzzz who has this in our forums.

Happy April Fools Day! Heres Your Fool!
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Comments


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  • michaeljcheaney

    Why can’t the good looking ones ever do something that entertaining?

  • http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=446437751 FlamingFox

    Why can’t the good looking ones ever do something that entertaining?

    Wow! Look who I dragged out of the forums to comment on the fp! Long time no see, stranger! ;)

  • Uvgottabkiddin

    I’m curious how the police decided who’d have to handcuff her. Draw straws? all say not me! at the same time and the last to say it had the pleasure? musical chairs?

  • Zibarro

    OK.. it had to be entertaining – no other explanation for watching that dried up old hag naked in the back yard! Good grief!

    Seems like Tequila has some competition with Kentucky Bourbon on that clothes falling off deal. lol.

    Yuk {{shudder}} Yuk

    Thanks FF. Entertaining to say the least :-)

  • MadeaBecBec

    Aww, come on people, she was just looking for her “teef” she thought the wanderin’ teef had somehow fallen in her clothes, only way to get them out, was to take the clothes off and shake ‘em….. Poor woman probably hadn’t been able to eat wif-out her teef! Empty stomachs make the alcohol work too quick….. And you know she was just having a drink wif dinner, when she couldn’t find ‘em….

  • RunecirE

    OMFG, Flaming, awsome story. Good the “see” you Michael.

    That’s usually when I start double-layering the latex gloves, yikes! Imagine having to wrestle that train-wreck to the ground. :p I’m sure they(the police) needed therapy, or a good porno mag, to get this lady out of their minds.

  • Lavonna

    That’s usually when I start double-layering the latex gloves, yikes! Imagine having to wrestle that train-wreck to the ground. :p I’m sure they(the police) needed therapy, or a good porno mag, to get this lady out of their minds.

    A bottle of Wild Turkey also might help them get that image out of their heads :-D

  • CassieMomma

    Nice. Gotta love that KY Burbon.

    Funny story :)

  • http://www.myspace.com/lost_faerie sanityslipping

    Hmmm, demanding money, and then taking her clothes off?

    Maybe she thought they would pay her to put her clothes back on. I would have gladly shelled out a few bucks to not see this woman nekkid.

  • bahaley4e

    Why can’t the good looking ones ever do something that entertaining?

    lol….Well generally speaking- God blessed us good looking with people with brains that function correctly! Not all the time… but a good majority! And chances are if you had a smokin hot blonde on your property stripping- you arent gana call the cops. Where is youve got Chewbacca doing a not so hot strip-tease in front of you- not only will you call the law but you may attempt to rip your eyes out!

  • RunecirE

    lol….Well generally speaking- God blessed us good looking with people with brains that function correctly! Not all the time… but a good majority! And chances are if you had a smokin hot blonde on your property stripping- you arent gana call the cops. Where is youve got Chewbacca doing a not so hot strip-tease in front of you- not only will you call the law but you may attempt to rip your eyes out!

    Bwahahahahaha…

  • MadeaBecBec

    I got to thinking, Mmmmm, I believe this article was already FP’d, ya know Nicole being the name and all…. Well, now I am convinced this is Scarpones momma, grandma, some kin…. Here: http://www.dreamindemon.com/2009/03/25/nicole-scarpone-yours-for-ten-bucks/#more-5616

    Now ain’t that just Freaky Friday or what?

  • knotme

    I’m 54 and look a damn lot better than this hag; of course, I don’t drink or do drugs and I drink my milk every single day! But what on earth make this woman think she’s even desirable? Even drunk, she HAD to know she looks like death warmed-over… yuk!! Is that a friggin’ mustache?

  • popeyeray

    i wouldn’t hit that even after a whole bottle of wild turkey!

  • Friday

    OMFG! Is that what 46 looks like?