Miss Nelson, Please Pull Up Your Pants
March 25, 2009 by Jaded
Kylene Nelson
Land O’ Lakes, Florida –Kylene Nelson, 42, really knows how to have a good time. She likes to toss back a few, turn the music up, and get down with her bad self! Who doesn’t like to let it all hang out sometimes? Only problem is, she was gettin’ her groove on in front of a classroom full of 8th grade Language Arts students at Charles S. Rushe Middle School. Nelson’s first period class couldn’t have known how the day was going to turn out when they walked into the classroom one morning last week. It’s a good thing that nearly every child in the US now carries a cell phone with audio and video capability.
To begin with, Nelson reeked of alcohol and she was making strange faces at the students. Then, a feeling came over her…she felt the need to dance. She turned on some music and exclaimed to her students, ‘If you don’t dance with me, you guys all fail.’ Grab them cell phones, kiddies…it’s about to get interesting.
Nelson started bumpin’ and grindin’ all over the classroom. She tried coercing some of the students to dance; those 8th grade boys, they don’t like to dance. The kids thought it was funny, but a little scary too. It’s not every day you get a chance to see your teacher lose her marbles.
Nelson was dancing with one poor 13-year-old boy named David when her pants fell down. The kids must have been horrified when they realized that teach wasn’t wearing any underwear. They told her, ‘Miss Nelson, please pull your pants up.’ She did…but all the grinding inched ‘em right back down. This time, she just held them there. Poor David.
At this point, I don’t think the kids knew whether to laugh hysterically, or to scream and cry in fear. Some students barricaded themselves behind desks, perhaps in fear of being Nelson’s next dance partner. ‘She was kinda grinding, like, putting her butt against you,’ one student said.
Later that morning, Nelson was interviewed by school officials, who said they could smell alcohol on her breath; her speech was slurred and she had difficulty walking. She was taken to a facility the school uses to test for drugs and alcohol. Reports state that Nelson had a BAC of 0.26. In Florida, a level of 0.08 is considered intoxicated. She later fled from the school and was found passed out near a pool at a neighboring community center.
Interestingly enough, this isn’t the first time Nelson has been plastered on the job. In 2006, Nelson didn’t show up for her 3rd period class at Seven Spring Middle School in New Port Richey; two assistant principals found her passed out in her car, surrounded by plastic containers of wine. ‘I’m wasted,’ she slurred at a school resource officer.
Instead of firing her, the Pasco County school board gave her another shot…on a couple of conditions. First, she had to take a leave of absence for the remainder of the 2006-07 school year and enter and complete a substance-abuse program. Second, she would not be allowed to return to Seven Spring. They assigned her to Rushe Middle School in 2007. She was told that if she ever violated school board policy on substance abuse again, she would be dismissed.
Last Wednesday, Kylene Nelson was taken into protective custody under the state’s Baker Act. School administrators asked all students to delete any photographs or videos of the incident. Yeah right…like that’ll happen.
For your viewing enjoyment…
4:51 am on March 25th, 2009
Hahaha! Great write-up SoJaded!
Those poor, poor kids! I would be freaked out too if one of my teachers ever did that. I had one that liked to pick his nose, and I mean digging for gold constantly, every single day during class, but never any drunks.
Crazy! I hope she gets some help.
6:52 am on March 25th, 2009
She never should have been allowed to continue teaching. She needs help for sure . Glad no one was murdered in this story
7:33 am on March 25th, 2009
Wow, just wow.
7:41 am on March 25th, 2009
poor david.
7:58 am on March 25th, 2009
Dang. What a whack-job.
Maybe she WAS a great teacher, but I do believe she has just shot that career to hell! WAS is a strong word. A great teacher is supposed to also be a decent, if not good role model, kids! Private lives should stay private!
Most companies have insurance or healthcare that provides for substance abuse treatment, IF YOU SEEK IT OUT.
8:31 am on March 25th, 2009
Aw man, poor kids, and poor David. Every 8th grade boy wants see a girl naked, but i’m thinking it’s more like a 16 year old girl, not a fat ass, drunk 42 year old teacher!!
Wow, they let her continue to teach after being drunk on the job the first time. Idiots.
8:33 am on March 25th, 2009
What is this, CRAZY BITCH DAY?
Introducing Nicole, Helen, and Kylene…The Three Crazy Stooges.
8:37 am on March 25th, 2009
My heart goes out to David I can just imagine how that poor kid felt! Also, the other kids must have been horrified when her pants fell down and all her glory was shining. As for Ms. Bumping & Grinding she needs some serious help but she needs to first admit she has a problem other wise the help won’t do but so much.
8:48 am on March 25th, 2009
Yup!
9:17 am on March 25th, 2009
Hey, why couldn’t stuff like this happen when I was in middle school?
9:19 am on March 25th, 2009
I remember my 8th grade LA teacher. Imagining any part of him nekkid makes me nauseous. Now, my gym teacher…that’s another story.
9:32 am on March 25th, 2009
LOL. I understand what you mean. In the middle school I went to, we had two gym teachers. They were both fine (and still are). I see them from time to time finishing their Masters (at an old age). They go to the same college I go to.
Keep these stories coming.
9:44 am on March 25th, 2009
Mmmm, methinks Ms. Nelson may have traded the wine for tequila!
“She don’t mean nothing – she’s just havin fun
Tomorrow she’ll say oh what have I done
Her friends will joke about the stuff she lost
ya tequila makes her clothes fall off
oh Tequila makes her clothes fall off ”
(Joe Nichols)
11:02 am on March 25th, 2009
Geez, if only my 11th grade student teacher had done that, I would have paid more attention in class
11:19 am on March 25th, 2009
If this isn’t what “rock bottom” looks like, I don’t ever wanna see it.
11:22 am on March 25th, 2009
Give all those kids “A’s” – but give David an early graduation with honors! Poor kid!
Totally disgusting. Shows she just “went thru the motions” to get her job back…. bet she’ll beg for a 3rd chance now.
Getting drunk is one thing – getting drunk first thing in the morning and going in to teach a class of 8th graders – and then topping it off with attempted lap dances – that’s a whole ‘nuther ballgame. Fucking kids couldn’t just get up and leave! Not in their minds, anyway.
Stupid lush.
11:27 am on March 25th, 2009
Nice to see that teachers still can do just about anything and not get fired.
5:19 pm on March 25th, 2009
That just makes this all the more hysterical!!
5:39 pm on March 25th, 2009
But that’s the glory of major, modern unions… It’s all about rewarding mediocrity and turning a blind eye to anything short of sexual misconduct.
5:40 am on May 1st, 2009
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5:08 am on May 22nd, 2009
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9:26 am on June 15th, 2009
[...] Miss Nelson, Please Pull Up Your Pants (dreamindemon.com) [...]
10:51 am on July 17th, 2009
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1:11 am on July 23rd, 2009
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11:58 am on October 13th, 2009
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