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Gregory Middle School on dreamindemon.com

NAPERVILLE, Ill. - Here is an interesting story going on in Illinois. Back in NovemberNovember reviewsNovember reviews, an 11-year-old boy was at a friends house when two other boys, ages 11 and 12, tied him up, stripped him and then sexually assaulted him. No details on what they did exactly, but the two boys were charged with criminal sexual assault and abuse . If those details alone aren’t fucked up enough, the three boys all attend Gregory Middle School and the two boys who were charged are still being allowed to attend.

No disciplinary action has been taken against the two boys in regards to the school, and aside from them being in separate classrooms from their victim, nothing else has been done. In fact, nothing else can be done, as there is no policy that allows the school to do a thing. The parents of the victim are not just sitting on their hands and have publicly expressed their outrage, most recently at school board meeting in Aurora. “Our son has shown extreme courage in coming forward to tell us, the school and the police of these incidents,” the victim’s father said. “Think of the courage he has to muster every single day to face his attackers on the bus stop, in the halls, in the cafeteria, in the common areas. We should show similar courage.“ 

They were joined with more than a hundred other concerned parents. Parents who want to know how come two kids charged with a sexual assault are being allowed to continue attending school with the victim with no disciplinary actions taken. “We need to demonstrate to all students that we, as a community, have zero tolerance for aggressive, violent behavior against students or staff,” the victim’s mother said. 

And therein lies the main issue with all of this. There are no guidelines for the school board to follow in this case. They have no victims’ rights policies or a policy that allows for school discipline in off-school matters. “It may be that, at some point, we would have a nexus to deal with this case in terms of school discipline,” said District 204 Attorney Jack Canna. “Right now I don’t see it. It would be, I think, a difficult situation for the school district to engage in some discipline knowing what the law tells us we can and can’t do.“  And he is right. If there is no current policy for this type of situation and they were to discipline the two kids that have been charged, you and I both know that they would have a fat, juicy lawsuit shoved down their throats.

One member of the board did announce that they had drafted a victims’ rights policy and tried to read it at the meeting, but the school board president stopped them, saying they need to discuss it privately first. They would then openly discuss the policy at another meeting in a couple of weeks. I know the president is just doing his job, but when I read that, the first thing that popped into my head was Mayor Larry Vaughn and his anchor suit from JAWSJaws reviewsJaws reviews. 

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Anyway, I feel for the parents and I wholeheartedly believe the two boys who have been charged have no place in this school. I feel that any student charged with certain crimes, especially sexual assault, should be immediately expelled. I also understand that, if there is no policy for the school to follow (and, trust me, from experience) schools absolutely will not do shit unless they are explicitly told to in some sort of fucking handbook, that their hands are somewhat tied…even if they got that way from being ill-prepared for this type of situation.

Parents should expect their kids to go to school and not be sitting beside an accused sex offender, but the school cannot do anything without fear of getting into legal issues themselves. So what do you think should be done?

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Comments

58 Comments on "Gregory Middle School Conundrum" make up the 115,823 total comments on Dreamin' Demon.

  1. Morbid
    1:39 pm on February 10th, 2009

    And yes, I used the word “Conundrum”. Deal with it.

  2. penelopejo
    1:46 pm on February 10th, 2009

    And yes, I used the word “Conundrum”. Deal with it.

    yeah, well you also used “no” in the place of “know”. Do I have to deal with that also?

    But, I think I would pull my kid out and send her to another school. I would rather her start over new and make new friends, than keep her in the halls with her offenders. Also, the entire school probably knows it him, so that’s even more embarrassing. I would really hate to be in that kids shoes right now and hope to God that my daughter never has to be in those shoes either.

  3. Morbid
    1:55 pm on February 10th, 2009

    yeah, well you also used “no” in the place of “know”. Do I have to deal with that also?

    If I had actually done that, then yes. Jesus…after 4 years of people pointing out all these non-existent spelling mistakes I supposedly make, you’d think they’d finally realize I do not misspell anything. Ever.

  4. Castille
    1:57 pm on February 10th, 2009

    And yes, I used the word “Conundrum”. Deal with it.

    Hey, that also happens to be the name of a wine I enjoy! But it is a conundrum. You can’t force kids out of school based on what may be false allegation – they’ve a right to their education. But you sure as hell don’t want a victim forced to interact with their attacker(s) in school. In my area they’ve gone round on this, since there were cases of girls being raped and having their rapist back at school that same week with the onus on the victim to remove him or herself from the school. Now, obviously that didn’t win much support. So the new policy appears to be moving the accused to a different school in the district. And this is the best solution they’ve come up with, but you *know* the parents at the recieving school are incensed that a potentially violent criminal has just been transfered to a desk next to their own precious children without much of anyone being the wiser, either. The other option would be to for the district to pay for a home tutor for the accused child, but that’s expensive and also probably poorly serves someone who is simply accused of something. When the crime involved is violent and the victim is a fellow student, this is the direction I lean in anyway.

  5. HotReadingMama
    1:58 pm on February 10th, 2009

    I feel that they any student charged with certain crimes…

    You did say that :)

    I seem to a remember a story on here about 2 middle school boys sexually assaulting another on a school bus recently. WTF is up with that?

  6. tutkill
    2:10 pm on February 10th, 2009

    I bet that school board has a policy for everything else in the world.

    Maybe, they can come up with some common sense policies-because they are certainly lacking.

    Poor kid-and stupid school. Two alleged dangerous offenders running around-who’s going to be their next victim. Wonder if the punks are in the same classes. Wouldn’t you want your kid going to the bathroom with them alone. Some type of school safety.
    If only they would take a wooden gun to school then they would be expelled for the rest of the school year. Damn at least hook up a computer and a web cam and make them attend class from their home. They are sick-couldn’t they be on medical leave.?

  7. Athena
    2:32 pm on February 10th, 2009

    Every district should have an emergency expulsion policy, like this:

    Notwithstanding any other provision of this policy, a student may be expelled immediately by a school district superintendent or a designee of the superintendent in emergency situations: PROVIDED, that the superintendent or designee has good and sufficient reason to believe that the student’s presence poses an immediate and continuing danger to the student, other students, or school personnel or an immediate and continuing threat of substantial disruption of the educational process. An emergency expulsion shall continue until rescinded by the expelling authority, or until modified or reversed pursuant to the hearing provisions set forth in Section XX or the appeal provisions set forth in Section XXII.

    It’s vague enough to allow the designated officials to use their own judgment, but the student in question is protected by the hearing provisions in the even of false allegations and such.

    Done and done. Parents, be sure to review the disciplinary section of your student’s district policy (it is often found on the internet, but the district office will gladly send you one upon request). If it’s lacking an emergency expulsion policy, raise hell. It’s an important clause.

  8. thatsmallgrl
    2:36 pm on February 10th, 2009

    But, I think I would pull my kid out and send her to another school. I would rather her start over new and make new friends, than keep her in the halls with her offenders. Also, the entire school probably knows it him, so that’s even more embarrassing. I would really hate to be in that kids shoes right now and hope to God that my daughter never has to be in those shoes either.

    That’s a good idea, however, that’s not really fair to that child either. The Two kids being charged with that crime are still going to be there. And I’m sure the whole school knows about those two kids as well. Why should the victim have to restart their whole life because someone else committed a crime against them.

    I would think that the other students would be more uncomfortable knowing that the two accused of the crime were there. Not so much the person it happened to. This is a tough situation. As Morbid said, if the school expells those two thenm they prolly would have a lawsuit on their hands. Which is also not fair IMO. The parents of these two kids should be more concerned with why they were expelled, not how.

    The only way to get those kids out of school is for them to be sent to juvie, or have laws enacted for schools to be allowed to inflict punishment on students for behaviour outside of school as well. Which of course would open a whole new can of worms. What would constitute a punishable offense outside of school, aside from the obvious?

    The of course begs the question, who would determine the obvious. Sexual crimes yes. But then you have say, drug use, stealing, anything else. Who gets to make the determination of what kids should be held accountable for outside of school? It almost seems as if this could be an unfixable problem.

  9. Lizard
    2:38 pm on February 10th, 2009

    There is no guidelines for the school board to follow in this case.

    That should be “are no guidelines.”

    A similar case in my area resulted in the perpetrator having to change schools, but that was a result of negotiations during the court proceedings, not any school board action.

  10. penelopejo
    2:46 pm on February 10th, 2009

    That’s a good idea, however, that’s not really fair to that child either. The Two kids being charged with that crime are still going to be there. And I’m sure the whole school knows about those two kids as well. Why should the victim have to restart their whole life because someone else committed a crime against them.

    Because, it will fuck them up psychologically if said child continues to attend the same school where his attackers are going. Having to go the the restroom in the same school with these guys who did this to him may be traumatizing due to the fact that these said boys could waltz in there and do it again. Having a clean start is better than having to be fearful of another attack. I remember how I was in middle school when something happened, whether it was someone having sex for the first time or even getting in a fight, even though nothing was said to the person it happened to, it was almost always said behind their backs. There were always rumors floating around about who did what, where, when, and why. I would not subject my daughter to that kind of humiliation if something of this magnitude were to ever occur to her. But that’s just my opinion. I know not everyone is going to agree with me, I’m just stating what I would do in this type of situation.

    Of course, I would also press the school district for a better policy on these types of situations after I moved my child to another school. I would do everything I could to stop other child from becoming victims again by having to face their attackers everyday.

  11. biteme
    2:47 pm on February 10th, 2009

    Anyway, I feel for the parents and I wholeheartedly believe the two boy who have been charged have no place in this school. I feel that they any student charged with certain crimes, especially sexual assault, should be immediately expelled. I also understand that if there is no policy for the school to follow, and trust me from experience, schools absolutely will not do shit unless they are explicitly told to in some sort of fucking handbook, that their hands are somewhat tied…even if they got that way from being ill-prepared for this type of situation.

    The other option would be to for the district to pay for a home tutor for the accused child, but that’s expensive and also probably poorly serves someone who is simply accused of something. When the crime involved is violent and the victim is a fellow student, this is the direction I lean in anyway.

    I feel the home tutor choice should 1st be given to the victim, would be embarrassing going to school after something like this. I feel the school board needs to immediately suspend the accused from this particular school until the situation is investigated. Innocent till proven guilty, but children’s safety 1st. Work can be sent home, from what I’ve seen in the past juvenile cases are handled rather quickly. No, I would not want anyone’s 11 -year old alone in a bathroom with these two, unless they’ve been cleared of any wrong doing. If they had been accused at school they would have been suspended during the investigation, the problem really is the penchant for law suites, and administrators being intimidated into not making a move unless they receive a presidential pardon in advance.

  12. RunecirE
    2:49 pm on February 10th, 2009

    Wow, right on, “SLAM ON MORBID DAY”. Did not see that on the calender of events. Who’s up tomorrow?
    OK…my turn… :D

    The parents of the victim are not just sitting on their hands, and have publicly expressed their outrage, most recently at school board meeting in Aurora.

    …sitting on their hands and have publicly… (no comma)

  13. RunecirE
    2:53 pm on February 10th, 2009

    On the serious side, to move the victim to a new scholl would victimize him/her a second time. I grew up HAVING to move from school to school and country to country. It is TOUGH. For the child to have to do it while already dealing with the painful memories of the attack would be incredibly tough.

    “Oh, you’re the new kid. Why did you move here?” How many times would he/ she have to face that question?

  14. Castille
    2:55 pm on February 10th, 2009

    Because, it will fuck them up psychologically if said child continues to attend the same school where his attackers are going.

    I think thatsmall’s point was that the accused should have to uproot their social lives, activities, and education – not the victim. Not that the victim should simply continue to attend school with their attackers.

    Biteme – I think possibly that home tutor choice was given to the victim in the case I was thinking of. But it doesn’t seem fair or logical to isolate the victim from others, to keep him or her from friends, school, extracirricular college application builing activities, or school social events as if s/he had done something wrong. Sure, there’s embarassment, but by excessively catering to it, I feel like the message that it’s appropriately placed might be sent.

  15. Morbid
    2:58 pm on February 10th, 2009

    That should be “are no guidelines.”

    Actually, it was supposed to be “There is no guideline”

  16. Morbid
    3:00 pm on February 10th, 2009

    …sitting on their hands and have publicly… (no comma)

    I use commas to emphasize speech patterns. Such as pausing. Same with my use of “…” any chance I get. Just imagine me as a cheesy news reporter.

  17. Morbid
    3:03 pm on February 10th, 2009

    Thank God…Athena is on the case!

  18. RunecirE
    3:04 pm on February 10th, 2009

    Makes sense, I had to pick something though. I was feeling left out of this special day.

    Honestly, I really enjoy your stories.

  19. Lizard
    3:06 pm on February 10th, 2009

    Makes sense, I had to pick something though. I was feeling left out of this special day.

    Nah, he can make up whatever excuses, but he’s still wrong.

    That should be “your stories.”

    :P

  20. Castille
    3:08 pm on February 10th, 2009

    …sitting on their hands and have publicly… (no comma)

    Gosh, now I don’t see that as a comma splice. I’d say the “have publically expressed their outrage” is more of a fragment, not a dependent clause. The subject is implied. If I wanted to make it more correct I’d add the subject and write “The parents of the victim are not just sitting on their hands, and they have publicly expressed their outrage, most recently at school board meeting in Aurora. ;)

  21. biteme
    3:10 pm on February 10th, 2009

    Biteme – I think possibly that home tutor choice was given to the victim in the case I was thinking of. But it doesn’t seem fair or logical to isolate the victim from others, to keep him or her from friends, school, extracirricular college application builing activities, or school social events as if s/he had done something wrong. Sure, there’s embarassment, but by excessively catering to it, I feel like the message that it’s appropriately placed might be sent.

    Castille, good points, always hardest on the victim no matter how a situations handled

  22. Athena
    3:11 pm on February 10th, 2009

    Christ, people. I went through that bitch with a fine-toothed comb, and even corrected the petty shit you know-it-alls didn’t point out, yet. That article is fucking bullet-proof, now.

    So, back to the story? :P

  23. tutkill
    3:12 pm on February 10th, 2009

    Sometimes the adminstrators can be asses too-my step daughter was sexually assualted at her school with witnesses. My step daughter called me from the school to tell me what happened and that the office would not listen. The guy was a big member on the football team. I arrived and went to the principals office where he told me to keep this quiet and he would investigate it while my step daughter could do her work in the office. Hell no- I took her straight out-the I was met by her sister who he just threatened “he would kill the whole family if we did anything). Well, we left the school while they were busy cleaning up the mess. We went straight to the police station and then dr.s.. Police said call us first-when this happens-school loves to hide these things-makes the school look unsafe (Duh). They picked him up before the next bell-he had a history of sexual assualts and violence. I got the phone call of why did you do that from the principal-we were handling it. I told him not fast enough for me and these children are my main concern. What a bs thing to happen-but you really don’t know who walks the halls with your kids at school (and sometimes adminstrators will hide the facts from you-they knew his was on probation for sexual assualt). Fight for and protect your kids-

  24. RunecirE
    3:14 pm on February 10th, 2009

    Whether the suspects are moved or not, the victim is still going to have to deal with the usual bullies and their stupid remarks. “You probably enjoyed it, huh?”
    This boy is going to need help. I hope his parents are as vocal to him with their love for him as they were at the meeting. The one thing he is going to need more than anything else is the constant and consistent love of his family and friends. Not necessarily poo-pooing over him, but certainly showing support and encouragement.

  25. Athena
    3:16 pm on February 10th, 2009

    “The parents of the victim are not just sitting on their hands, and they have publicly expressed their outrage, most recently at school board meeting in Aurora.”

    Indeed, that would have been the most grammatically-correct option outside of simply removing the comma (I, too, tend to use commas quite a bit for emphasis, but, in that particular case, I felt simplicity was best).

  26. Castille
    3:17 pm on February 10th, 2009

    Anyway, I feel for the parents and I wholeheartedly believe the two boys who have been charged have no place in this school.

    Oh, come on Athena, I totally think a comma goes after parents. But you know, I don’t really give a damn where other people place their commas. So nevermind, hehe.

  27. RunecirE
    3:17 pm on February 10th, 2009

    Nah, he can make up whatever excuses, but he’s still wrong.

    I know, but I didn’t want him thinking i was too serious. Just having some fun. ;)

  28. Abroad
    3:20 pm on February 10th, 2009

    Tutkill, – that school has some f’ed up priorities. Sorry you and your daughters had to deal with that. Glad the police had your back!

  29. biteme
    3:20 pm on February 10th, 2009

    Christ, people. I went through that bitch with a fine-toothed comb, and even corrected the petty shit you know-it-alls didn’t point out, yet. That article is fucking bullet-proof, now.

    You didn’t hear from me, I take it for granted, you way is the right way.
    LOL

  30. penelopejo
    3:23 pm on February 10th, 2009

    Whether the suspects are moved or not, the victim is still going to have to deal with the usual bullies and their stupid remarks. “You probably enjoyed it, huh?”
    This boy is going to need help. I hope his parents are as vocal to him with their love for him as they were at the meeting. The one thing he is going to need more than anything else is the constant and consistent love of his family and friends. Not necessarily poo-pooing over him, but certainly showing support and encouragement.

    Which is why I would remove my child from the situation. I would rather my child lie about the fact on why she was moved to another school, than to stay in a situation where other children are going to say ,”I know you liked it. How bout you let me tie you up?”

  31. RunecirE
    3:25 pm on February 10th, 2009

    Today, commas, yesterday, apostrophes (apostrophes’, apostrophe’s), tomorrow, who, knows, what,
    isn’t', the, english’s, language, wonderful, in, it’s’, accuracies, and articulation’s’!

    woops, an, exclamation, point, now, how’d,’ that, get, in, there,?

    woops,… :)

  32. Lizard
    3:26 pm on February 10th, 2009

    Christ, people. I went through that bitch with a fine-toothed comb, and even corrected the petty shit you know-it-alls didn’t point out, yet. That article is fucking bullet-proof, now.

    Needling Morbid over his errors is one of the few pleasures in my life that doesn’t involve money or possible muscle strain. You ruined it, Athena!

  33. Athena
    3:40 pm on February 10th, 2009

    Needling Morbid over his errors is one of the few pleasures in my life that doesn’t involve money or possible muscle strain.

    I watched an episode of this cheesy show called “Superstition” the other night. It’s like Buffy, kind of – instead, two cute brothers hunt demons or something. Anyway, in this episode, a magician was able to pull off lethal tricks because, instead of him dying, other magicians were being killed by the wounds he would have sustained.

    Same logic applies here. So, yeah… enjoy your needling while I leak from pin-sized wounds. ;)

  34. IrishSparkle
    3:48 pm on February 10th, 2009

    My oldest son was in 8th grade and was accused by a girl of sexual harrassment….yea, 8th grade….now mind you, she was not the best little girl in school and she did not have a good chance of turning out like a nice young lady. However, because she accused my son, the principal went to my sons class, took him to the office, put him in a conference room by himself, questioned my son and threatened to call the police in on the matter IF he found out it was true my son told him over and over again that she was lying and he doesn’t even talk to this girl. Well, the principal investigated and found out the girl was lying. NOT ONE TIME did the school principal call me to tell me what had happened nor had he called the girls parents to discuss the matter. My son came home from school, told me about it and I called the principal. I in turn called the district as well…and wouldn’t you know it, they did NOTHING about it. The law is that no child under the age of 14 (I think) is to be questioned without his/her parent. So yea, school districts do nothing for the protection of the children in my opinion. HOWEVER, the principal in question…yea, he got promoted to the high school that my son attends and it was only 2 years later for that.

  35. RunecirE
    3:55 pm on February 10th, 2009

    Athena, we are humbled by your sacrifice and weep with joy at your feet that it is not us who suffer.
    MWAH!

  36. April
    4:08 pm on February 10th, 2009

    I would be outraged! Even if the school has no policy – What about a restraining order or some sort of police order that would require removing them from the same school as the victim. Never mind the other “possible” victims. And what the fuck is wrong with these kids?? 11 and 12 year old boys sexually assaulting other boys?? That is the bigger problem here. Someone needs to see what is going on in the homes of these children. YIKES!

  37. FlamingFox
    4:34 pm on February 10th, 2009

    Whether the suspects are moved or not, the victim is still going to have to deal with the usual bullies and their stupid remarks. “You probably enjoyed it, huh?”This boy is going to need help. I hope his parents are as vocal to him with their love for him as they were at the meeting. The one thing he is going to need more than anything else is the constant and consistent love of his family and friends. Not necessarily poo-pooing over him, but certainly showing support and encouragement.

    I feel the same. I don’t think it’s fair that the victim should have to leave their school, yet, I do admit if it was my child, I would look into homeschooling or admit them into another school. I feel for this child.

    Twelve is a difficult age, and I cannot imagine the pain, embarrassment, and possible teasing the child is forced to endure by remaining in that school. The child is going to need a lot of love and support to get through this.

    The school’s policies are no surprise, yet, they do make me, as a parent, wonder what the case would be if a similar situation happened to one of my own kids or their friends. Thanks Morbid for giving us a heads up and opening our eyes to a new venue that does need some serious consideration and looking into.

  38. MadeaBecBec
    4:42 pm on February 10th, 2009

    And therein lies the main issue with all of this. There are no guidelines for the school board to follow in this case. They have no victims’ rights policies or a policy that allows for school discipline in off-school matters. “It may be that, at some point, we would have a nexus to deal with this case in terms of school discipline,” said District 204 Attorney Jack Canna. “Right now I don’t see it. It would be, I think, a difficult situation for the school district to engage in some discipline knowing what the law tells us we can and can’t do.“  And he is right. If there is no current policy for this type of situation and they were to discipline the two kids that have been charged, you and I both know that they would have a fat, juicy lawsuit shoved down their throats.

    Here in my hometown, they have what is called, “Alternative” School, there is currently 2, the school district may add 2 more (for middle school students)…. This is where the “bad” kids go to school, either because they have been accused or found guilty of some type of crime, in or out of school, it’s only for a semester (unless the Superintendent decides the student should attend there longer) and I believe all areas should have them, the students are still being educated while going through the court process. If they are found guilty, then, depending on their sentence, they will remain there until they graduate, they have 2 teachers(usually a male & female) per every 15 students…. They also have law enforcement come in and have “show & tell” as well as former convicts, sort of like “Scared Straight”….. Too, if the student is in Sports, they do NOT get to participate until everything is cleared up! Maybe this school should do something like this….

  39. silvahalo
    6:18 pm on February 10th, 2009

    {Morbid and Athena’s grammar/spelling is always on target in my book. I totally suck with both, that’s why I never wrote much for the news, instead I wrote the PSA’s for them….I know when I suck!}

    If this was my child, I would take it as far as possible to see that both children are removed permanently from the school and criminally charged. This child, the victim, should not have to go through any more trouble and distress, seeing his attackers every day in school. In the interum, I would probably home school.

    These types of actions should never be taken light, by parents, the school or the law. If anyone is doing so, change has to happen, at all costs.

    Recover completely, young one.

  40. tutkill
    6:51 pm on February 10th, 2009

    My oldest son was in 8th grade and was accused by a girl of sexual harrassment….yea, 8th grade….now mind you, she was not the best little girl in school and she did not have a good chance of turning out like a nice young lady. However, because she accused my son, the principal went to my sons class, took him to the office, put him in a conference room by himself, questioned my son and threatened to call the police in on the matter IF he found out it was true my son told him over and over again that she was lying and he doesn’t even talk to this girl. Well, the principal investigated and found out the girl was lying. NOT ONE TIME did the school principal call me to tell me what had happened nor had he called the girls parents to discuss the matter. My son came home from school, told me about it and I called the principal. I in turn called the district as well…and wouldn’t you know it, they did NOTHING about it. The law is that no child under the age of 14 (I think) is to be questioned without his/her parent. So yea, school districts do nothing for the protection of the children in my opinion. HOWEVER, the principal in question…yea, he got promoted to the high school that my son attends and it was only 2 years later for that.

    I am sorry your son went trough that-

    Kinda reminds me of that Peanuts special where Linus is sent to the office for sexual harassment . That episode was whacked.

  41. Janelle
    7:59 pm on February 10th, 2009

    Good grief – when my oldest son was in kindergarten, another boy scratched his neck, breaking the skin. Their policy was to call the other boy’s mother to take him home, and readmit him after he received counseling. That worked for me.

    In this case – the kids were actually charged, but . . . . . nothing happens? I don’t know how it works with junveniles, but it’s a serious charge. . . . . yet they’re going to school as if nothing happened? This is much bigger than a scratch on the neck – just doesn’t sound right at all!! That poor kid has to face his molesters, possibly on a daily basis as school. . . . WTF?!? That is so not right!

  42. Nerdzilla78
    10:38 pm on February 10th, 2009

    All I know is that I am grateful to have read a book called “Protecting the Gift” by Gavin de Becker a couple of years ago. It’s a difficult book to read, but it shines a light on all these kinds of horrible events that no parent wants to envision, and how to take reasonable precautions. When we enrolled my son for K, I went over their discipline policy with a fine tooth comb (as well as safety issues), I talked with his teacher and principal at length, and warned them that I was going to be “one of [i]those[/i] parents”
    My heart goes out to this family. It’s one of those worst case scenarios– this kid is being victimized every which way he turns. I can’t imagine a school not having a policy that errs on the side of caution in something so serious.

  43. Zibarro
    7:28 am on February 11th, 2009

    The issue, unfortunately, is that this happened off school property. I believe, had it happened on school property, the accused would be suspended pending the outcome of the criminal case. When my daughter was sexually assaulted ON school property there was no hesitation on the part of the school to have the perp arrested, suspended and consequently, expelled. And she faced NO charges or discipline for clocking him square in his face! (my little scrapper drew blood!)

    I agree that school policy needs an overhaul. Protecting the accused at the expense of the victim has got to stop. I can’t imagine the stress this boy feels daily having to face his assailants. You just know they are smirking as they pass him in the halls and probably taunting him as well. I admire his strength to continue to attend and not let them victimize him even further by leaving, as if HE did something wrong.

  44. RunecirE
    9:24 am on February 11th, 2009

    I agree that school policy needs an overhaul. Protecting the accused at the expense of the victim has got to stop. I can’t imagine the stress this boy feels daily having to face his assailants. You just know they are smirking as they pass him in the halls and probably taunting him as well. I admire his strength to continue to attend and not let them victimize him even further by leaving, as if HE did something wrong.

    Ditto, but how do we change so many policies nationwide? You know this is not an isolated incident. How ’bout the two turtle-heads on the bus with the “pie-box”? Kids are pushing the envelope further and further because, as time goes on, the old tactics lose their shock value. They have to come up with bigger and more dramatic ways to bully and humiliate. How do you combat this behavior? I blame the parents.
    Even now, I hear my boys and others joke about being gay and blowing each other kisses ( mild compared to what happened in this article), but if we had done such things when I was a kid, we would have been beat up or ostricised (sp).

  45. LeeMouse
    10:34 am on February 11th, 2009

    My oldest son was in 8th grade and was accused by a girl of sexual harrassment….yea, 8th grade….now mind you, she was not the best little girl in school and she did not have a good chance of turning out like a nice young lady. However, because she accused my son, the principal went to my sons class, took him to the office, put him in a conference room by himself, questioned my son and threatened to call the police in on the matter IF he found out it was true my son told him over and over again that she was lying and he doesn’t even talk to this girl. Well, the principal investigated and found out the girl was lying. NOT ONE TIME did the school principal call me to tell me what had happened nor had he called the girls parents to discuss the matter. My son came home from school, told me about it and I called the principal. I in turn called the district as well…and wouldn’t you know it, they did NOTHING about it. The law is that no child under the age of 14 (I think) is to be questioned without his/her parent. So yea, school districts do nothing for the protection of the children in my opinion. HOWEVER, the principal in question…yea, he got promoted to the high school that my son attends and it was only 2 years later for that.

    The laws regarding questioning children vary from state to state, and they only relate to questioning by police. Not by school officials, since those kinds of issues are THEIR JOB. How on earth could a principal function if he could only talk to a student when parents were present? How much would parents bitch about having to take off work to come down to the school every time the head of the school needed to talk to a child about something? In Pollnow vs. Glennon, the court specifically ruled that questioning by a school official is not analogous to questioning by law enforcement, so there is no presumption that parents must be present. While that specific case regarded New York state, similar cases have applied the same principal in other states. There is also legal precedent that schools MUST take all claims of sexual harassment in the schools seriously (Davis vs. Monroe County). The principal stating that he would call police IF he found out the charges were true? Well, duh. That’s what he’s supposed to do. They weren’t true, so he didn’t. The principal did exactly what he was supposed to do–took the girl’s claim seriously, investigated, and the dismissed the matter when the charges were revealed as unfounded. So I’m not sure why you’re so outraged.

    While it must have been a little disheartening for your son to be accused, I am pretty disturbed by your tone toward the girl. “now mind you, she was not the best little girl in school and she did not have a good chance of turning out like a nice young lady.” What exactly the hell is that supposed to mean? Are you saying that the principal should have just said, “Well, clearly this girl is a bad seed, a whore and a liar who will amount to nothing in life. So I’m just going to assume she’s lying. Because even if she’s not, who gives a fuck? She’s trash.” Because it sounds a lot like that’s what you’re saying. I doubt your son will be scarred forever by the experience; things like mandatory drug testing, ethics testing, compliance forms are more and more part of the workplace these days, regardless of whether or not there is reason to suspect an individual would do something illegal or unethical. It’s part of becoming an adult. The little girl, on the other hand…if she’s making unfounded charges of sexual harassment, then chances are pretty good that there’s something unhealthy going on in her home life. Would have been nice if you could have voiced something other than judgment and scorn for her.

    Oh, and Peanuts episodes aside: cases where children ARE harassed and assaulted in school and nobody listens? Those outnumber cases of unfounded accusations by about a kajillion to one. Be glad you have a school system where someone cares enough to take it seriously and investigate. Because god forbid one of your children ever end up on the other side of the equation.

  46. FlamingFox
    11:05 am on February 11th, 2009

    This is just a reminder for all the Demonintes and loyal readers. InColdBlog is currently running the Second Annual In Cold Blog Detective Awards. Please remember that you can vote once a day, everyday for your favorite True Crime Blog. Even if you have not become a member of this site yet, but visit everyday because you just can’t live without it, please show your support and go cast your vote for the Dreamin’Demon! Thank you.

    http://incoldblogger.blogspot.com/2009/02/icb-detective-award-nominees-2009.html

  47. tutkill
    11:13 am on February 11th, 2009

    I wonder how the parents of the girls that were stripped searched by school officials looking for one tylenol feel?

    If you had read a little earlier my daughter was a victim of sexual assualt, and I do take it very seriously. I only brought up peanuts-because we live on in a society of either over zealousness or apathy.It was a bad attempt at humor to help lighten up a bad situation for that parent.

    When I was teaching at a private school we had a little girl who told of being asssualted. We went through the proper channels and the parents (& Family) put together that this started at school. They went into this never happened and it was a lie. She was removed from the school. They firmly stood by the accused. Six months latter the accused was accused again by another child. He ended up committing suicide. The police found his note affriming he did everything plus vidio evidence. People make mistakes (parents, teachers, adminstrators) however, I would rather err on the side of safety for the child. In this case of the 11 year old- the school really doesn’t seem overly concerned with safety (emotionally or physically). I really wonder why-juvenile authorities are dragging their heels. Again that may be someone making a mistake. The parents need to fight as hard as they can for their child. It seems they are doing just that.

  48. tutkill
    11:16 am on February 11th, 2009

    And yes, I used the word “Conundrum”. Deal with it.

    I actually like that word. LOL

  49. CassieMomma
    11:37 am on February 11th, 2009

    And what the fuck is wrong with these kids?? 11 and 12 year old boys sexually assaulting other boys?? That is the bigger problem here. Someone needs to see what is going on in the homes of these children. YIKES!

    Yeah seriously!

  50. Castille
    12:00 pm on February 11th, 2009

    I agree that school policy needs an overhaul. Protecting the accused at the expense of the victim has got to stop. I can’t imagine the stress this boy feels daily having to face his assailants. You just know they are smirking as they pass him in the halls and probably taunting him as well. I admire his strength to continue to attend and not let them victimize him even further by leaving, as if HE did something wrong.

    This is true, I think. But I don’t think it likely these boys are smirking or taunting. I find it more likley that for them this was some kind of joke that went badly awry, and now they’re in an awful lot of very serious trouble. My bet is that they are neither oblivious or unconcerned with that at this point.

    Kids are pushing the envelope further and further because, as time goes on, the old tactics lose their shock value. They have to come up with bigger and more dramatic ways to bully and humiliate. How do you combat this behavior? I blame the parents.Even now, I hear my boys and others joke about being gay and blowing each other kisses ( mild compared to what happened in this article), but if we had done such things when I was a kid, we would have been beat up or ostricised (sp).

    I really don’t think things have changed so much. The standards of what behavior we take seriously, and at which age are changing. While sometimes it crosses into the ridiculous, like a kindergartner being accused of sexual harassment, I fell overall we’re becoming more enlightened on these issues. And homosexuality becomng more acceptable in a mainstream way hasn’t anything to do with. In fact, it doesn’t have anything to do with kids teasing each other in such a way – the teasing nature of it would actually suggest to me the continued underlying unacceptability of gayness in those circles.

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