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Stanley Chojnowski Videotaped Sex Abuse

January 27, 2009 at 8:54 am by  
Stanley Chojnowski Videotaped Sex Abuse

Stanley Chojnowski

Stanley Chojnowski, 39, stood in court yesterday, pleading guilty to sex abuse charges. Chojnowski has been charged with four counts of aggravated sexual assault, one count of attempted aggravated sexual assault, and three counts of endangering the welfare of a child. He is currently sitting in jail without bail waiting for sentencing. He faces a mandatory minimum of 30 years in jail. Please excuse the somewhat incoherent rant that follows.

The arrest and charges stem from his activities involving a young boy over three-year period starting in 2004. The boy was only 6-years-old when the abuse started, Chojnowski getting access to him after befriending the boys family, starting with his mother, a co-worker. Chojnowski had garnered enough trust that he admitted in court that he had taken the boy on trips out of state, the sole purpose being so that he could assault him. All of this stopped in August of 2007 when the boy finally told family members of the abuse.

I know we got some pussies out there who wont agree with my next statement, but you guys remember Gary Plauche? He was the father who blew the brains out the man accused of molesting his son. He did it in an airport in front of police and reporters. I remember that day because when I saw it on the news, I broke both of my hands from clapping so hard. My thoughts on pedophiles is well known by now, and for those of you who care about what they may be, it is simple. Put them down humanely, like a dog or cat. It will be an action more humane than anything they have shown to their victims, and you ensure 100 percent, they wont do this again.

These guys do more than destroy children and their friends and families, the also continue the cycle. Some pedophiles are born this way, wires getting crossed up in the womb or something…while others are abusing because they themselves were abused. I think there is help for the latter, but for the former…put them to sleep. No need for fanfare, or flaying of skin…just get them out of society in a way where the functioning public doesn’t have to pay for their continued existence.

Probably not a very popular viewpoint amongst certain circles, but it is what it is. In regards to this piece of shit, if this boy were my son, I have no doubt that I would INVITE hate to overtake me like a flame. We’d be sitting at the table, and my son would tell me what this eggplant looking fucker has been doing, and I would kiss him on the forehead, stand up and yell “Flame On!” before seeking out this tub ‘o fail and introducing him to an hours long nightmare of pain and suffering unlike anything ever seen in the deepest bowels of hell. Of course, I would then run around the streets in my underwear acting like that cartoon bird who goes Koo-Koo for Cocoa Puffs, but instead of a bowl of cereal and some milk, it would be two of my own turds that I would be smearing all over myself.

Not a perfect plan, and yes I would be going to jail for some length of time (I figure it really depends on how much shit I am able to smear) but in all honesty? I think I could do more for my kid happy I did something, even if I were behind bars, than if I did nothing. The guilt for not being there for him, no matter the consequences, would eat at me every single day. I would be a shell of a man, a living ghost. Living my days knowing the fat fuck who did it was in a cell somewhere eating a hot meal and jacking off to what he did to my kid? Huh-uh…no way in hell. But that’s just me.

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Comments


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  • Dakota Valkyrie

    We would all assist and testify in your defense. If that didn’t work, I would cheerfully smuggle anything you desired into prison for you. May I never have need to know what would be on that list.

  • CountJackula

    Thank Morbid for this post! I COMPLETELY agree with you! Hopefully this guy gets what he deserves in prison….

  • solange822001

    What sickens me almost as much as what this guy did, is the fact that the mother decided it was normal to leave her son with him and have them go out of town together. Who the fuck does that??? Who is that stupid? Please take this child away from this mother, please. I know some people are going to think im overreacting, but I cant help think that she obviously does not have the sense to keep him safe. Imagine how traumatic this is, for a little boy to be abused by a man…

  • http://www.dreamindemon.com Morbid

    What sickens me almost as much as what this guy did, is the fact that the mother decided it was normal to leave her son with him and have them go out of town together. Who the fuck does that??? Who is that stupid? Please take this child away from this mother, please. I know some people are going to think im overreacting, but I cant help think that she obviously does not have the sense to keep him safe. Imagine how traumatic this is, for a little boy to be abused by a man…

    Going by the following article, which uses the word “bereft” when describing the victims family, I am betting that the family is poor, and that this jackass preyed on that and used it to his advantage.

    http://www.trentonian.com/articles/2009/01/27/news/doc497e9a7e40104928516995.txt

  • Wolf_of_Mars

    http://www.trentonian.com/articles/2009/01/27/news/doc497e9a7e40104928516995.txt

    One of the comments at the online newspaper article mentions a form of Japanese attitude adjustment that involves a glass rod inserted into the penis & smashed with a hammer. I’ll volunteer to do it to that asshat, as long as I can be double-gloved. No tellin’ where else that thing has been…

  • http://www.myspace.com/titicarie philly_phan

    Living my days knowing the fat fuck who did it was in a cell somewhere eating a hot meal and jacking off to what he did to my kid? Huh-uh…no way in hell. But that’s just me.

    Ditto that! It’s not just you, Morbid…me too.

    So the asshole likes to tape his exploits? Perfect. Now we have concrete proof of his crimes and should have no trouble convicting him. What a fucking waste of breath and life, fucking sicko. I HATE, DETEST, WANT TO VOMIT AND SPIT ON PEOPLE WHO HURT KIDS! Sometimes I wish this was the Wild West where we could be vigilantes and take matters into our own hands…what a release that would be.

  • Shizz

    Maybe the boy’s father died, I’m thinking that’s why family was vulnerable and why the writer used ‘bereft.’

    But seriously, how could you let someone take your child. Trust NO ONE, parents! You have the right to look at EVERY person who comes into contact with your child with skepticism. In fact, it is a duty, and you don’t have to feel bad about it!

    What a sick son of a bitch.
    Agree with Morbid, f*ck this guy up.
    Agree with a poster in that linked article, show him video of himself being repeatedly raped in prison.

  • biteme

    Probably not a very popular viewpoint amongst certain circles, but it is what it is. In regards to this piece of shit, if this boy were my son, I have no doubt that I would INVITE hate to overtake me like a flame. We’d be sitting at the table, and my son would tell me what this eggplant looking fucker has been doing, and I would kiss him on the forehead, stand up and yell “Flame On!” before seeking out this tub ‘o fail and introducing him to an hours long nightmare of pain and suffering unlike anything ever seen in the deepest bowels of hell. Of course, I would then run around the streets in my underwear acting like that cartoon bird who goes Koo-Koo for Cocoa Puffs, but instead of a bowl of cereal and some milk, it would be two of my own turds that I would be smearing all over myself.

    an hour would not be enough time, more like days or weeks of hell & we the jury would set you free

  • Tied Angel

    anyone who can look at a child and see anything but a CHILD is pathetic! I agree with Morbid. If you see a child as a sexual conquest then you need to be put down like the dog you are! There is no excuse for what he did.

    I say kill the bastard and feed him to cannibals!

    In fact this should be how we deal with all pedophiles!!

  • Not So Speechless

    I think removing their genitals surgically and putting them all on an Island together to live out the rest of their filthy lives is just fine.
    They can have anesthesia for the surgery and once on the island all the pork and beans they can eat.
    Alternately a needle to the arm/humane termination of life as morbid suggested could work too.

  • FlamingFox

    One of the comments at the online newspaper article mentions a form of Japanese attitude adjustment that involves a glass rod inserted into the penis & smashed with a hammer. I’ll volunteer to do it to that asshat, as long as I can be double-gloved. No tellin’ where else that thing has been…

    That sounds a whole lot better than my idea to do a Bobbit, Sticking it up his anus, then shoving it down his throat, and then just let the POS bleed and choke to death. I agree with putting them down like the animals they are, but make sure they at least suffer for awhile first. A very long while.

  • NJLiLi

    Morbid. thank you for picking up this story. This is from my local paper. I want to also say that Trenton is a small urban city [7.5 sq. mi.] with a whole lot of people [approx 85,000 pop] It’s mostly a minority population with high unemployment, crime rate and large amounts of convicted sex criminals. It is in these types of enviornment that are a hunting ground for pervs.

    Of course, I would then run around the streets in my underwear acting like that cartoon bird who goes Koo-Koo for Cocoa Puffs, but instead of a bowl of cereal and some milk, it would be two of my own turds that I would be smearing all over myself.

    I soaked my lappie when I read the above. Funny thing is several cons here have already used this ploy in some variation or another.

  • Deety

    Just don’t bring the weapon with you, and you should be fine. Because you just went there to “confront” him, you just wanted to “talk,” to find “closure.” But then you lost it and beat him to death with his own lamp. Oops!

    How could any jury convict you? You obviously just had a temporary break from reality, and I’m sure it will never happen again.

  • http://www.dreamindemon.com Morbid

    Morbid. thank you for picking up this story.

    No, thank you for sending it to me.

  • ecvmanzo

    I know we got some pussies out there who wont agree with my next statement, but you guys remember Gary Plauche? He was the father who blew the brains out the man accused of molesting his son. He did it in an airport in front of police and reporters. I remember that day because when I saw it on the news, I broke both of my hands from clapping so hard. My thoughts on pedophiles is well known by now, and for those of you who care about what they may be, it is simple. Put them down humanely, like a dog or cat. It will be an action more humane than anything they have shown to their victims, and you ensure 100 percent, they wont do this again.

    Not me, I totally agree. There was also a woman back in the 80′s that shot and killed her son’s abuser in court. She would not plea insanity although her lawyer suggested it. She would say that she was not insane at the time of the shoting. She is one of my heros.

    This sick fuck should be put away forever!!!

  • JessicaR

    You can remove their genitals but you’d also have to remove their digits and tongue to keep them from being repeat offenders. (I know that is really gross).

    What I don’t understand is how, poor or not, it doesn’t raise a parents eyebrows that a grown man wants to spend a lot of time with their 6 year old son.

    My in-laws have a male neighbor, he lives alone, no girlfriend, and this single stud loves children but doesn’t have any of his own. My in-laws were feeding his dogs while he was out of town and he had some yorkies (which I like) so my father-in-law asked if I wanted to come over while he feed the dogs. He had video games, arcade style, not much furniture, a computer and lots of children’s software. Huge red flags for me. My in-laws swear he is a nice guy…and maybe I am just a paranoid-over-protective-mom but I made it very clear I think he is a pedophile and under no circumstances are my kids allowed to be around him. But it is very uncommon for me and my husband to go out by ourselves anyway. We only allow certain family members to watch our kids. Which definitely limits our options but my kids are totally worth it.

    I do have a 6 year old son and a daughter and if anyone ever touched my kids the tax payers would not have to waste time on a trial.

  • katester

    Awesome. I’d empty my piggy bank out for your defense.
    Hamilton Township is the home of Megan’s Law…we Hamilton moms don’t take kindly to pervs living amonsgt us, and I for one can get behind your brand of vigilante justice…..

  • 2 boys mom in NC

    Morbid,
    Best write up you have ever done by far!
    Being the mother of a 7 year old, I imagine myself doing the same thing…(thank you for the shit smearing hint there.)
    When is society as a whole, going to realize that there is no rehabilitation of these nasty-maggot-crawling-rotting-flesh-of-the-world?
    May the wrath of the world be let loose upon you, you sick fucker!

    Again, great write up, Morbid.

  • Athena

    I know we got some pussies out there who wont agree with my next statement, but you guys remember Gary Plauche? He was the father who blew the brains out the man accused of molesting his son…

    In a perfect world where a parent knew for a fact that the adult was molesting their child, and a parent who did the deed themselves would get pardoned by the court, I’d be down.

    But this isn’t a perfect world. Kids lie (not this kid, obviously – referencing another story) and parents go to jail for this sort of thing.

    That said, the cycle of abuse theory is dubious at best. Sexual abuse does not create offenders, as the vast majority of victims do not grow up and offend. On the other side of that coin, only about 30% of sex offenders report being abused as children (retrospective self-reporting, which accounts for the majority of this research, is less reliable than longitudinal studies that track abuse victims into adulthood). Depending on what estimate you use, this number is only slighly higher than than the percentage of the general population that has been abused. Of course, genetic predisposition could easily account for that increase (kids who are molested by family members are more likely to be genetically predisposed to becoming abusers themselves).

    Just thought I’d throw that stuff out there.

  • buggysmommy

    One of the comments at the online newspaper article mentions a form of Japanese attitude adjustment that involves a glass rod inserted into the penis & smashed with a hammer. I’ll volunteer to do it to that asshat, as long as I can be double-gloved. No tellin’ where else that thing has been…

    Holy Shit Wolf! I don’t even have a penis and my shit is acheing from the mere thought! Egads…

  • buggysmommy

    YOU THE MAN MORBID!

    I couldn’t agree with anything you conveyed more. However I did find the shit smearing part rather profound and diabolical at the same time.

  • flawed_existence

    Hell Morbid, we’d all strip to our undies and follow you around in the streets! The authorities would be so confused they’d just give up and let you go! After giving you that medal, of course.

    It’s the truth, though. Our society has got to stop letting these unredeemable criminals loose after they are caught. They cannot stop. They don’t want to stop. And they DO NOT stop abusing children until they are dead.

  • Concerned Citizen

    Morbid, you sound like my father. At my first parent/teacher conference in kindergarten, my dad told the pricipal that if he ever touched me with the “beating stick”, he would burn the school down with the principal in it. He said he’d rather risk jail than let some sweaty old man corner me alone in his office with an S&M toy. I don’t even want to think about what he would’ve done had someone actually laid a hand on me.

    One of the comments at the online newspaper article mentions a form of Japanese attitude adjustment that involves a glass rod inserted into the penis & smashed with a hammer. I’ll volunteer to do it to that asshat, as long as I can be double-gloved. No tellin’ where else that thing has been…

    *shiver* (and I don’t even have a penis)

  • btrflyangl

    Put them down humanely, like a dog or cat. It will be an action more humane than anything they have shown to their victims, and you ensure 100 percent, they wont do this again.

    Morbid, you are my hero!!

  • Abroad

    Hell Morbid, we’d all strip to our undies and follow you around in the streets! The authorities would be so confused they’d just give up and let you go! After giving you that medal, of course.

    “I am (Morbid) Spartacus”? :-P

  • kerry

    Just curious, is the person who writes the opening comment named Morbid? I like the way Morbid does not mince any words. I agree with all of you in regard to these kind of offenders. They do not get better. I believe they are born with something wrong in thier heads. I would be inclined to take matters into my own hands and see to it he did not do it to another child. I am curious about Loretta Polanco is a waste. Do you have anymore news about how she is going to plea? I am the one who knows her and haven’t heard anything lately?

  • Special2bme

    Not a perfect plan, and yes I would be going to jail for some length of time (I figure it really depends on how much shit I am able to smear) but in all honesty? I think I could do more for my kid happy I did something, even if I were behind bars, than if I did nothing. The guilt for not being there for him, no matter the consequences, would eat at me every single day. I would be a shell of a man, a living ghost. Living my days knowing the fat fuck who did it was in a cell somewhere eating a hot meal and jacking off to what he did to my kid? Huh-uh…no way in hell. But that’s just me.

    I don’t know running around in underwear and playing like the koo-koo for cocoa cocoa puffs bird you may be in the psych ward not prison. But hey at least you might get some good drugs. But I agree with your sentiments exactly. I would fucking cut their nuts off who ever tried to touch my child.

  • http://www.myspace.com/aprilamber April

    Of course, I would then run around the streets in my underwear acting like that cartoon bird who goes Koo-Koo for Cocoa Puffs, but instead of a bowl of cereal and some milk, it would be two of my own turds that I would be smearing all over myself.

    Is this for your insanity defense?? Wingo! I love it.

  • OMalley

    Morbid, I completely agree with you!

  • mipmop

    I agree if that was my child this fuk did that too,he would not have to worrie about a trial,because as sure as i am typing this,i would put a fuking bullet between his eyes after telling him i would,so he could see the gun before i fired it. and if u remember the man that did kill the dude that malested his son,was aquited of any charges.

  • Brnzmag

    As bad as i would feel not being there for my son i would find a way to kill the motherfucker who did something to my child…. i wouldn’t be able to live with myself knowing the monster is somewhere out there and i have told this to my Fiance countless times i am so overprotective of my son its crazy i don’t let him spend more than an hour or 2 alone with my brother who lives with us and has a baby of his own not because i think he might do something to him but because i would rather be safe than sorry the only people my 3 year old is around for more than a few hours alone is my mother in law who lives with her mother and my own mother and of course my Fiance (his dad) and I’ve told everyone i know that if his dad and i didn’t work out i would be single till my son is out of the house and in college and when he starts school im sure taking him to school and picking him up i can’t stand that here in Orlando the schools have these children out there in the dark waiting for the school bus

  • Castille

    As bad as i would feel not being there for my son i would find a way to kill the motherfucker who did something to my child….

    I get this.. and I don’t get this. I mean, I understand the feeling – I’d feel the exact same way. I’d want blood. LOTS of blood. And some screaming. But my kids? Do they want vengeance? Or do they want their mama and daddy? I know damn well it’s the latter, and to risk that in favor of the the satisfaction of vengeance would be selfish to the extreme and serve them not at all. Sometimes you have to sacrifice for your kids, and rather than killing someone, that can mean not killing someone. Because I bet the potential for being fucked up increases astronomically after losing parents and having every facet of their lives implode over something that part of your kid probably believes is somehow their fault or something they should’ve prevented. Teach them not to tell ya next time, eh? Sometimes you have to suck it up and be a bigger person than you want to be in order to help your kid see a way through and heal, but there are real parents who manage it every day, and I think those are the real heros. Those others? We may applaud, since they vicariously sastified our own desires, but they opted to check out on their kids and focus on their own needs and pain instead.

  • manfredvonassenhammer

    i am going to make an educated guess here and say that this fuckwad is a preferential pedophile. i seriously doubt that this is a “cycle of abuse” type thing(and i understand the controversies surrounding that theory) or any other type of non-pedophilia mental/emotional problem. befriending a troubled/negligent mother to gain access to a child = textbook. therefore,he seriously needs to be put down, my only dissent being that it should be inhumane.

    i also don’t think it’s an overreaction to say that something is wrong with the mother. i don’t see how anyone could let someone like this guy have so much access to their child, especially letting him take the kid out of state! if a man takes a strong interest in a kid and wants lots of alone time and special trips with the kid, something isn’t right. you cannot be too careful when it comes to things like that. that was her responsibility and she failed her son. i see that she didn’t know about the abuse at the time, but i don’t think it’s unreasonable to say she allowed it to happen.

    unfortunately, while i agree she should probably be investigated, i hate to think of how much worse that can make things. if there’s no responsible and trustworthy grandma or aunt to take the kids, the foster care situation this kid would go into could make things even worse. some foster parents might be great and caring, true. however, i personally know people who were temporarily removed from their homes as kids who were then physically and sexually abused in the foster home. so as far as taking the kid away goes, it may not be in the best interest of the child when the abuser does not live in their house. all very complicated.

    aside from all that tl:dr stuff i just typed and going back to the pedo who was the real focus of this story, that isn’t complicated. again, eliminate him and make sure it’s unpleasant. and if that is judged unconstitutional(as i realise it undoubtedly will be), the island/castration idea isn’t bad.

  • Castille

    i don’t see how anyone could let someone like this guy have so much access to their child, especially letting him take the kid out of state! if a man takes a strong interest in a kid and wants lots of alone time and special trips with the kid, something isn’t right. you cannot be too careful when it comes to things like that. that was her responsibility and she failed her son. i see that she didn’t know about the abuse at the time, but i don’t think it’s unreasonable to say she allowed it to happen.

    Morbid said:

    Going by the following article, which uses the word “bereft” when describing the victims family, I am betting that the family is poor, and that this jackass preyed on that and used it to his advantage.

    I agree with morbid here – only, I think that in using the word bereft unqualified they mean bereaved here. She may have been a woman anxious to fill a hole in her son’s lives, and it seems this guy was previously a family friend (even close to grandma,) who appeared to step up to the plate in order to be there in a genuinely paternal way for these children who have lost someone. There was an older brother too, and maybe she felt like between the 2 of them, something odd would be reported to her. Bottom line is there was vulnerabilty that was easy to spot – and it was exploited. It’s easy to spot someone predatory who seems to have an unusually strong interest in your children. It’s harder when it’s someone who is already your friend that you’re encouraging to spend time with your children in order to provide them with mentoring adult relationships.

  • Uvgottabkiddin

    I have children myself and I have thought over and over what I would do. I would NOT call the police, AND WAIT FOR JUSTICE. I would find whomever did this to my child, I would kidnap the person in any way possible. I know where there is an old farm house, I would take him and tie his balls to anything that can not be moved, anything, I would then let him watch me pour gas around him, I would do this very slowly. When I got to the door, I’d give him a choice, either rip his own genitals off or die in the fire. I would wait until the fire died down and I would go to the police and confess. Hopefully I would be featured on D’D'!! Lord willing I will never have to, but I would rather die in prison knowing that he would never hurt a child again, than watch him claim that he had a hard childhood, a mental deficiency and see him sentenced to 3 year probation… fuck the justice system, I GOT THIS!

    The above scenario is if it was a man, if it was a woman, I would simply kill her with my bare hands.

  • SumrLilli

    I am a single mother of a 10 year old boy.

    Before my son ever left my arms I had a plan in motion for this type of scenario.

    #1 – My child would never face a judge or jury and become a “Poster Boy” for this type of crime victim – thus attaining a life-long title of “victim of sexual abuse”.

    #2 – Again, not wanting an event of that type to ever happen period – but then DAMN SURE I didn’t want it to become a pivotal moment in my son’s life, I couldn’t seek the personal retribution route.

    #3 – My child would know from the first time he ever left the house without me – or me without him – that there will never be secrets between us.

    (As an aside – this has been harder to follow thru on my end as I am single, attractive & do date from time to time. It has created some awkward but true to the course moments)

    #4 – EVERYONE that comes into contact with our small family (just the two of us) know that under no circumstances do we tolerate secrets, whispers, sneakiness, or anything that is not openly acknowledged. Thus, you will be immediately exposed – so watch your behavior. Young and Old.

    #5 – I limit who is alone with my son (never boyfriends) and observe their behavior no matter how long they have been around. I follow my instincts and figure if I’m wrong – no harm / no foul.

    #6- My son has been aware of sexual violation since he was about 2. “Nobody touches you there and you don’t touch anyone there”. “You will not be in trouble if this happens, and I need to know”. “If you feel uncomfortable with any of the adults in your life, avoid them as much as possible and let me know right away”

    People are damaged. Not everyone, but enough people that I consider it my sole responsibility to prepare my son for the danger that lurks around us. I take into consideration that his occasional dad (the doner) & stepmother do not have the depth of protection and concern in their love towards my son and I discuss with my son the lack of limits and boundaries that could potentially endanger him while visiting their home.

    No need to play indoors at neighbors homes. “If the boys want to get together, I will be happy to have your little junior over.” (school friends).

    Don’t get me wrong, I have never been called “over-protected”. My son does not fear adults and is comfortable communicating openly with adults and children.

    But he does have a healthy respect for the fact that the world is peppered with weirdos. And when someone makes him feel strange, he responds with a keen survival instinct.

    I am in East Central Florida and recently there have been a rash of sexually charged hazing incidents involving sports teams of varying ages from 12 on up. My son plays both football and basketball. He will attend no events involving busing or overnight stays without me being present (ever the volunteer).

    I am not wealthy, have not always had a job much less a decent job. But I do have my priorities straight. I am not a victim and my child won’t be either.

    MAN UP you weak pathetic people who live as and train your children to be victims and not survivors!!!!!

    (sorry this is so long – I read this blog everyday and have just vented all my thoughts in my first post.)

  • Abroad

    I am in East Central Florida and recently there have been a rash of sexually charged hazing incidents involving sports teams of varying ages from 12 on up. My son plays both football and basketball. He will attend no events involving busing or overnight stays without me being present (ever the volunteer).

    I cannot tell you how relieved I was when I saw what was in that parenthesis. Until I read that I was beginning to worry that you were crippling your boy socially by never allowing him to participate in anything, but I see you walk the walk, too.

    Wishing you every success.

  • Athena

    I second Castille. A prison sentence for a parent who sought vengence would likely be as psychologically detrimental as the sexual abuse. Why victimize your kid twice?

  • SumrLilli

    I cannot tell you how relieved I was when I saw what was in that parenthesis. Until I read that I was beginning to worry that you were crippling your boy socially by never allowing him to participate in anything, but I see you walk the walk, too.

    Wishing you every success.

    Thank you, Abroad. Reading back over my post, I think I sound pretty over-protective & scary.

    I’m not.

    My son is well integrated into society with a healthy awareness of the fact that even the nicest seeming people may face insurmountable temptations that are potentially harmful to the public at large.

    (I often say Ted Bundy was a “nice guy”.)

    I guess I just wanted to drive the point home that we are responsible for the well-being of our children. It is so disturbing when parents perpetuate a cycle of victimization by being reckless & selfish. Or just irresponsible.

    There is a balance between letting our children go & grow and preparing them for the pitfalls of human nature.

  • bahaley4e

    I think removing their genitals surgically and putting them all on an Island together to live out the rest of their filthy lives is just fine.They can have anesthesia for the surgery and once on the island all the pork and beans they can eat.Alternately a needle to the arm/humane termination of life as morbid suggested could work too.

    hahah…..Im with you. But maybe it would be more appropraite if their genitals were forced into an orphas of thier own body, then they would know what it feels like to have it done to them? Fair enough??

  • Uvgottabkiddin

    There is a balance between letting our children go & grow and preparing them for the pitfalls of human nature.

    I also did most of the things you posted earlier, I had the talk over and over again with my kids…. I showed them “bad” people that looked like a “grandpop” or someone who “looked” like they were young who did bad things. That bad people can be the ones we love, and that if you are at all uncomfortable in a situation to walk away. Scream fire instead of help…. I always make examples, I used all of the tricks I had. They begged me to stop, they said they knew!!! They’d get so mad. I live in a small town and to show the residents how trusting kids are no matter how well you have prepared them, they had two un uniformed police officers drive around. They came up to my son and his friend (right in front of MY house,and asked how to get to the wawa (right around the corner) my son was 8 (I had drilled into his head that anyone can be bad.) walked right up to the car and started telling them!!! To make matters worse he offered to show them where to turn to get there!! I walked out as he was pointing to the corner….. My heart broke.. So as much as you think you have prepared your child, never be too sure. It makes me so sad, of all they kids I knew, my son would never be the one to talk to strangers….

  • SumrLilli

    Uvgottabkiddin, I hear you. I still see my son do things that make him vulnerable and that is why I remain a watchful presence.

    It sounds like you know your role in your childrens’ lives. We just have to protect and prepare knowing one day they will be alone to make the decisions on their own.

    Kids are usually natural pleasers unless they are just painfully shy. They want adult approval. That is their natural reaction and it takes awhile to learn how to hone the skill of discernment.

    I tell my son that some people use their powers for good and some use them for evil.

    I often remind him to use his powers for good!! (and that not everyone does)

  • Lavonna

    “I am (Morbid) Spartacus”?

    No I am (Morbid) Spartacus :-)

  • Lavonna

    I have children myself and I have thought over and over what I would do. I would NOT call the police, AND WAIT FOR JUSTICE. I would find whomever did this to my child, I would kidnap the person in any way possible. I know where there is an old farm house, I would take him and tie his balls to anything that can not be moved, anything, I would then let him watch me pour gas around him, I would do this very slowly. When I got to the door, I’d give him a choice, either rip his own genitals off or die in the fire. I would wait until the fire died down and I would go to the police and confess. Hopefully I would be featured on D’D’!! Lord willing I will never have to, but I would rather die in prison knowing that he would never hurt a child again, than watch him claim that he had a hard childhood, a mental deficiency and see him sentenced to 3 year probation… fuck the justice system, I GOT THIS!

    Hell yeah! We think the same (well, you are more graphic than I can think BUT I love your idea)

  • 2 boys mom in NC

    I am a single mother of a 10 year old boy.

    Before my son ever left my arms I had a plan in motion for this type of scenario.

    #1 – My child would never face a judge or jury and become a “Poster Boy” for this type of crime victim – thus attaining a life-long title of “victim of sexual abuse”.

    #2 – Again, not wanting an event of that type to ever happen period – but then DAMN SURE I didn’t want it to become a pivotal moment in my son’s life, I couldn’t seek the personal retribution route.

    #3 – My child would know from the first time he ever left the house without me – or me without him – that there will never be secrets between us.

    (As an aside – this has been harder to follow thru on my end as I am single, attractive & do date from time to time. It has created some awkward but true to the course moments)

    #4 – EVERYONE that comes into contact with our small family (just the two of us) know that under no circumstances do we tolerate secrets, whispers, sneakiness, or anything that is not openly acknowledged. Thus, you will be immediately exposed – so watch your behavior. Young and Old.

    #5 – I limit who is alone with my son (never boyfriends) and observe their behavior no matter how long they have been around. I follow my instincts and figure if I’m wrong – no harm / no foul.

    #6- My son has been aware of sexual violation since he was about 2. “Nobody touches you there and you don’t touch anyone there”. “You will not be in trouble if this happens, and I need to know”. “If you feel uncomfortable with any of the adults in your life, avoid them as much as possible and let me know right away”

    People are damaged. Not everyone, but enough people that I consider it my sole responsibility to prepare my son for the danger that lurks around us. I take into consideration that his occasional dad (the doner) & stepmother do not have the depth of protection and concern in their love towards my son and I discuss with my son the lack of limits and boundaries that could potentially endanger him while visiting their home.

    No need to play indoors at neighbors homes. “If the boys want to get together, I will be happy to have your little junior over.” (school friends).

    Don’t get me wrong, I have never been called “over-protected”. My son does not fear adults and is comfortable communicating openly with adults and children.

    But he does have a healthy respect for the fact that the world is peppered with weirdos. And when someone makes him feel strange, he responds with a keen survival instinct.

    I am in East Central Florida and recently there have been a rash of sexually charged hazing incidents involving sports teams of varying ages from 12 on up. My son plays both football and basketball. He will attend no events involving busing or overnight stays without me being present (ever the volunteer).

    I am not wealthy, have not always had a job much less a decent job. But I do have my priorities straight. I am not a victim and my child won’t be either.

    MAN UP you weak pathetic people who live as and train your children to be victims and not survivors!!!!!

    (sorry this is so long – I read this blog everyday and have just vented all my thoughts in my first post.)

    Dear SumrLilli,
    Most beautiful post I have ever read! You should write a book and I will be your number one fan!!!!! Can you tell I was once a single mom to a 13 and 3 year boys! Great, just simply great!

  • SumrLilli

    Thank you, 2 Boys Mom. I know that I seem radical, but it has equated to a very natural and open household. If I made sense to you – then that is probably your experience as well. Kudos to any of us that see that our job goes above and beyond the job description.

    Thanks again. You made my day!