Wendy Harden Snapped
December 18, 2008 by Jaded
West Palm Beach, FL–I hate the ’snapped’ defense, it sickens me to even reference it in this article, but it seems to be the only logical(?) explanation for 28-year-old Wendy Harden’s behavior. She went a little nuts Tuesday night and started stabbing and slashing her two children, an 8-year-old girl and an 8-month-old baby boy, with shards of broken glass.
Investigators say that Wendy became enraged and smashed her head through a window. She then used the glass shards to stab her daughter on the shoulder and her baby up to 5 times in his head and chest.
Neighbor Chad Elam was shocked to see the 8-year-old girl running down the street, bloodied and screaming for help. Elam raced over to the house and confronted Wendy. ‘She was screaming incoherently, she wasn’t there. It wasn’t her there. You could look at her face. It wasn’t a human being.’ Wendy turned around to face Elam and brought the glass shard up and cut her own neck. He managed to knock the glass out of her hand and drag her outside, where he held her until authorities arrived.
The father of the children was contacted by police while on a trucking route. He stated to police that Wendy had been battling an addiction to pain killers, which she took for her back. Her daughter told police that earlier, her mother had taken 4 of the pills and it ‘made her crazy.’ Officer’s found empty prescription pill bottles of Oxycodone and Hydrocodone and a nearly empty bottle of Crown Royal.
The infant was hospitalized in critical condition, as of yesterday, he had been upgraded to stable. The 8-year-old is doing fine, physically anyway, and staying with a relative.
Wendy Harden is still hospitalized. When released, she will be arrested and charged with attempted murder of the baby boy and aggravated child abuse.
Thank you Chad Elam, for getting involved. You saved the lives of those children Tuesday night.
8:43 am on December 18th, 2008
Didn’t this already happen? I mean I know not literally, but honestly I just saw a tv show and it was the same story, but I think it wasn’t pain meds, it was depression meds. Anyway just sad. I don’t care how fucked up you are why would you hurt your children and who just drinks a whole bottle of alkie around their kids. Ok I need to stop because I am getting really mad.
9:03 am on December 18th, 2008
She sure did snap, looking at her myspace I kinda feel bad…She obviously loves the kids…. Still,she should have swallowed the pills and went to sleep…. forever…. very sad.
9:17 am on December 18th, 2008
They should send Wendy to Never-Never Land with Peter Pan.. What a fucking waste of space..She almost killed her little boy, and that poor, precious 8 y.o. girl will be traumatized for a very long time. I hope the Dad files for divorce and keeps her away from those preciouse children. I wouldn’t trust her as far as I could throw her.. And somebody needs to throw her in with big Bertha so she can SNAP on her! POS
9:42 am on December 18th, 2008
If the breasts, mixed with the breasts, are what made this woman snap like that, I almost feel bad for breasts even though it was her breasts. Can you imagine coming off the breasts of those breasts and then realizing what you have breasts?
I wonder how the breasts will handle this, IF she doesn’t go to breasts for any length of time. I mean, how do you breasts what was just a bad reaction to mixed breasts, and what wasn’t? How could you trust her alone with the breasts again?
9:50 am on December 18th, 2008
Hehhhh
10:09 am on December 18th, 2008
Would that combination of drugs and alcohol really make a mother lose it enough to stab her children?? …she STABBED her children! that is some crazy shit….I’m sure that is the defense she will use. Really, though, I want to know if it is likely, and feasible that the drug/alcohol combo caused her to lose her mind.
I would imagine this combo abuse is not unheard of…did this happen before with someone else taking that concoction? this women was either temporarily insane or she’s just your regular crazy nut who deserves to have her ass-kicked daily in prison.
She better be damn crazy, or I’ll be glad to beat her senseless and take what’s left of her sanity!…either way, I think I’ll kick her ass anyway.
Poor children. I hope they both recover completely…kisses little ones.
10:10 am on December 18th, 2008
That definitely sounds like psychosis, not the usual crap we read about. I wonder if it was induced by pills and alcohol, or aggravated by pills and alcohol. Bless the neighbor for stopping her. I really feel bad for her kids.
11:07 am on December 18th, 2008
Addiction? How about abuse?! I was prescribed Oxy afer surgery, and I hated the way it made me feel! I’ve had Hydro too b/c I complained about the Oxy. I was itchy and groggy…certainly not a homicidal maniac! It indicates bright and clear on the bottle do NOT take w/ alcohol. The combines effect made her crazy! What an idiot. Hurt yourself if you feel the urge, not your poor defenseless children! Good for the 8 yr old who ran and got help…but it’s sad she’s old enough to know and probably always will remember the night mom ’snapped’. Crazy cunt.
1:21 pm on December 18th, 2008
Exactly,why hurt the kids you brought into the world.Take your pills and your Crown Royal grab a blankie and pillow and lock yourself in the bathroom and do what you want to yourself and just die in the tub!!To even have a thought to hurt your kids is enough to take up residence in the tub!That 8 month old thank god hes going to be o.k and he wont remember anything(although im not to sure about that)the 8 yr old will never forget.My father stabbed me in the head when I was 6 months and Im not sure if I remember from the act (which is unlikely) or from the whisperings of family members over the yrs growing up.He was a drunk.And I came out and asked my mom when i was around 9-10 and she was in shock that I knew anything about it,I guess it was a big secret although his ass was tossed out and he was jailed for it so she didnt condone it and cover for him.But I guess since I was that young I wasnt supposed to know anything about it.Hopefully that baby boy wont hear anyone talking about it and wont have a clue,its better that way rather then thinking your own parent wanted you dead!!
2:34 pm on December 18th, 2008
*Snort-giggles @ Morbid*
I drank beer and took a Xanax once and don’t remember a freakin’ thing. Apparently I had a lot of fun. It does sound like something happened…some sort of reaction with the meds as well as something sending her over the edge that would make her take the med / Crown combo.
I’m curious to hear what she’s got to say. I hope she feels like shit.
7:08 pm on December 18th, 2008
She mixed crown and oxys which made her a little stabby.
Poor thing. The guy that knocked the shard of glass out of her hand prevented her from killing herself,Maybe.
He should be prosecuted as well for intevening in justified suicide.
Oh and SU, I just tried your email address, it bounced. Snort-giggles @ Morbid
9:12 pm on December 18th, 2008
I had jaw surgery few yrs back and night of superbowl my mouth was killing me so I took tylenol 3 and decided to sip a bit of crown royal just to dull the pain.Well sip turned into more then a couple glass’s.I really dont remember alot of the night and after my husband told me few things Im glad I dont lol,nothing bad really just really embarrassing lol
10:15 pm on December 18th, 2008
it sounds like she seriously lost her mind. Remember, she wasn’t just be stabby. she put her own freaking face through a window. If that doesn’t say crazy, I don’t know what does
11:22 pm on December 18th, 2008
I was playing on a swing set in my neighbors backyard. When they came out screaming at me about it being 3 in the morning or something, I ran off tripping over my clothes I had stripped off earlier. I didn’t want the scrape I got to get infected, so I smoked about 50 dollars worth of crack to go along with some peach flavored moonshine I drank through a funnel.
After taking a dump on the hood of my neighbors car, peppering their dog with a pellet rifle and then coming inside my house and then using my own feces to smear Bible passages in our nursery, I punched my wife in the face while she slept and then passed out.
When I woke up, my kids were cleaning up the mess and my wife was nursing a busted lip. Then they all started laughing at me because I had forgotten to take off my tie. I was soooo embarrassed!
11:29 pm on December 18th, 2008
LOL ok you win!!Mine involved clothing removal too but not outside!!Scary thing is what you just posted probrably has happened to inbred hill billys,,
12:34 am on December 19th, 2008
Oh damn…I laughed so hard my spleen cracked. Thanks Morbid.
6:48 pm on December 19th, 2008
I don’t believe she lost her mind or snapped….Her mental break with logic, reality and reason, appears to be caused by an underlying issue, drugs and alcohol.
Sometimes these stories are the hardest to understand…. a seemingly normal mom, who does an unbelieveably horrible thing.
I wonder if post partem depression played a part, her son was only 8 months old.
Poor little girl, who will, at 8 forever remember the day….the day her mommy lost her mind…..perhaps the little girl can use it in her defense when she grows up with issues.
Merry Christmas little girl, the world isn’t all ugly, I am sorry for the ugliness you’ve seen.
10:39 pm on December 19th, 2008
It sounds as though she might have an underlying psyche problem that she’s been self medicating with drugs and alcohol. Post partum psychosis maybe? Putting your own head through a window isn’t exactly standard child abuser fair, ya know. Maybe it’s drugs and alcohol, but I think those can also serve to cloud the issue of what really may be going on. The people I’ve known with significant psychiatric issues have all spent varying amounts of time – sometimes many years – with various degrees of success self-medicating with street drugs, misused prescriptions and alcohol.
5:07 am on December 20th, 2008
From her blog – sounds like she was perhaps addicted due to a bit of schitzophrenia? She’d won the battle once – apparently, this time IT won. (bold and italics added by me)
Saturday, August 23, 2008
WHAT AM I ???? a must read…~~~
Current mood: enlightened
Category: Life
WHAT AM I?
When I walk into a room EYES light up, hearts start pounding, all of the attention is fixated on me! I am hypmitizing, I am fresh, you have heard rumors about me that are true, and can bring a smile to your face just by talking about me. I can make you feel like your feeling the breeze off the ocean’s from all over the world, I can make you feel like you have just hit the lottery, like nothing has ever went wrong in your entire life, like you are the ruler of the world, the universe even! I enlighten you with numbness and engage you with ectasy. I trick your mind repeatedly and rapidly into the unknown, curiousity is one of my favorite weapons. I awaken your spirit to all of your surroundings making the room bright with confidence and love, analizings this and that. Assuring you that you can overcome anything because you are special and unique in your very own way. We like so many others are on top of the world, any world we choose, our mind body and soul are aroused, we can do anything we want to do, whenever, wherever. I make you feel this way for what seems like eternity , and seconds all at one time.
And then darkness falls over you, your spirit has weakened your heart is POUNDING, only because I am gone and you want me back. Your thoughts are racing on how to get me back. Your loneliness is overwhelming, you miss me, oh how you miss me, it’s like your running out of oxygen- your dying now- OH THIS FEELING- ALL YOU CAN THINK OF IS GETTING IT BACK! “I want it,I want it NOW!! please, PLease, PLEASE someone find it, steal it, buy it with everything you’ve got!” I’ll sell, steal, I’ll even embarrass myself, I’ll yell, I’ll scream, GIVE IT BACK!!!
Now I’ve been left in the dark with a voice in my mind- OH THAT VOICE MAKE IT STOP! Bring IT back and shut the voice up! Everything was great, oh I could’ve conquered the world, I could’ve beaten anything or anyone in my path. I thought my confidence was unlimited, I thought this feeling would last forever.I thought what those around me had said were true. The world was ours! it was perfect and beautiful and I was in control. GIVE IT BACK G/D IT!! How can I get by? I depended on it, I thought we could go anywhere and do anything. I/we were on top of the world, THE UNIVERSE. And IT LEFT! G/D it!!!!! IT LEFT! The tears won’t stop. This voice in my head is giving me options- I dont want to choose- DON’T MAKE ME CHOOSE!!! OMG! THE ULTIMATE QUESTION IS LIFE OR DEATH. it can’t be I’ve been tricked, fooled-
For some just a short exsperience of all of this is enough for them to walk away and never look back. They’ve been there done that they may tell you they may not.
For some this feeling comes and goes- given one chance after the other to make a decision different than the same time and time again, over and over For months even years. Some watch their friends go to hospitals and even jail. Some have watched their closest friends and family die!
Some can’t find away out because they might think they are normal and that all the ones around them trying to help arent, “they don’t understand” Some don’t even have someone around them to tell them to stop, to remind them they are committing suicide in a very slow painful manner, the ultimate sin.
Some start young- and that kid inside of them chases that old feeling around- the kid that was tricked and fooled and only wants to know that everything is right when they have IT. And when they look around and try to listen even when they have given up on themselves the voices of so many others are begging and pleading and fighting for them. OH the ones who start young and little by little they let it tell them that everything may be ruined now- so go get more, what’s done is done.
When they think they can see, but they are walking around blind,. They think they can hear but are walking around deaf. They can surely feel, but yet they are numb to everything that is real and good, even the things you smell have been interuppted. You think you can taste but you have lost interest in the only real thing that never let you down food, water. How can this feeling that was so great, that was hypnotic, powerful, beautiful and even seemed godlike have so many enemies?
Some have lost their lives to this and in return a small percentage walk away from IT never to return. They turn their backs on it like IT had done to them so many times.
Some fight IT everyday- they fight to survive, they fight to quit, they fight for more, they fight for less. Some fight for their loved ones because this beatened path is very well known. Yet to the young and new that havent a clue about the pain and suffering- sometimes until it’s to late.
I could continue about so many people that are victims and the sadess parts are alot of victims never chose IT, or felt IT. That powerful feeling they declined or was never interduced to. These victims are mom’s and dad’s fighting for their children- husband’s fighting for their wives/ and vice versa. Whole families having interventions because their loved one really believes that noone loves them, that they are alone, some have convinced themselves that they are already dead and all the stops have been pulled to have a few moments to intervein- to hit the pause button in your brain and make you see that you are hurting yourself, killing yourself, and everyone around you also, that’s when you may really stop to ask yourself how are hurting them????? you do it, they don’t. But it’s true.
Those that recover fight everyday. From dusk til dawn. They fight to not use, they fight for forgiveness from their chosen god, they fight for love from the inside out. You have probably , met some, heard of some, or even seen some on t.v.
This is so powerful that we have to work in groups constantly and consistantly to overcome, to belong, to feel, to taste, to hear, to smell, to just be free.These groups form in different places offering help to those accepting and even to those who arent. YOU are always welcome in their home.
I have a story like so many others, that I share when I should, don’t when I should’nt and believe “THIS TO SHALL PASS” I write to vent and even pass time. Maybe noone will read this who know’s???
WHAT AM I?
If you don’t know, now is time to find out……
I’ve been clean since 2002,I feel happy and beautiful, and so very blessed that I got help. I saved my own life, I saved my husbands life, who also needed some help, and I have saved my children’s lives by being a great mom…., anyone can do it…
5:30 am on December 20th, 2008
Another telling entry — her whole blog is like a window into her world. A pretty screwed up world at that. Not that it’s an excuse per se – but it does help (at least me) understand that she was a ticking time bomb all her life and each year just added more to the explosive mix. I really hope she gets some help. I hate to see people with mental health issues just thrown away and forgotten. You all might say “I hope she suffers the rest of her life” – but to me – she’s done nothing BUT suffer thus far. I’m sure she wanted to be a great mom – and probably was for a long time. But as with everything else in her life – the effects wore off and the illness took over again. Nothing she tried would stop the pain, the anguish, the despair from returning again. This woman did truly “snap”. I pray for her children to find some peace and understanding as they grow. Mom is/was sick.
http://blogs.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog.view&friendID=312991813&blogID=380099011
2:33 pm on December 20th, 2008
I thought voices in your head were fine… I thought it was when they moved to being outside your head that you needed to let someone know
10:46 pm on December 23rd, 2008
Let me tell you a lil story about one Wendy Harden. Wendy is my sister n law, and I only say n law because it just shows the exact relation. Wendy is my sister. I love Wendy with all of my heart and I know that I would not be where I am today had Wendy not been by my side for so many years. Wendy was, and is, the type of person who thinks she can save this world with her love, her words and her actions. Wendy is the most upbeat, cheerful and wise beyond her years woman. She has a calming voice that can dry your tears and help mend your shredded heart. Wendy, for the past 14 years has been my brothers best friend, his lover, his wife, the mother of his beautiful children. Wendy has ALWAYS put everyone before herself and is a very loving and devoted mother. She and my brother moved to West Palm Beach for a brand new start and adventure in life. With the odds against them, they gave it their best shot. With work hard to find, my brother had to take a job as a truck driver. He did his part to provide the best he could for his family. It is hard to be away from your best friend and husband that you have spent every single day with for 14 years. He was gone a lot. Not his fault, he was trying to take care of his family. Wendy took a job at a resturant, mind you with the two steel rods she has running up both sides of her spine to keep her standing upright..it was painful and honestly she should not have been working, but Wendy always wanted a job to feel like she was doing her part. Wendy is a people person and can brighten the darkest days. She loved that job. However, as time went on, my brother being gone a lot on the road, stuggles of the bills pilling up, being basically a single parent and not having really close friends there, my sweet smiling Wendy started to fill the effects of depression. Trying to come off the pain meds didn’t help, so her “friends” and even some of her family members would provide her with other meds for relief and it became worse. Wendy isn’t a big drinker and I can’t say for sure if the crown royal bottle that was found was something she was drinking or if it was my brothers bottle, which he rarely drinks and a crown royal bottle could very well sit there for months at a time. After my nephew was born, I truly believe that the baby blues set in. I talked to wendy and she would cry and cry. I knew she was depressed, I knew she was unhappy there. For God sakes, we all live in Georgia and they now lived 10 hours away from us. I regret more than anything that I didn’t take Wendys crys more serious. I know Wendy. You don’t. The Wendy that smashed her head thru a window, the Wendy that bruttally attacked my niece and nephew is not my Wendy. She would never and I mean never hurt those babies or herself if she had been in her right mind. I was not there that night, I wish I had been. I can’t say for sure what was in my sisters head or why this happened, but believe me when I say, it was not my girl. I feel so bad for my niece and nephew, they have lost their loving mother and it will forever be in my beautiful little nieces mind what happened that night. Can you imagin watching your mother not only attacking you, but cutting her own throat? Can you honestly tell me that someone that had their mind in control would put their head thru a window, attack their children and then cut their own throat? I’ve had nightmares every night since it happened about it. Every night. You people have no idea what you are talking about, you have no idea who Wendy is. You have no idea and you pass judgement and wish death upon my sister. Screw you and your small minds with nothing better to do than visit sites like this to talk and say horrible things about people that you dont even know. I’m here because I was told people were saying things about this and you have no idea what you are talking about. My brother has lost his wife, the mother of his children. The woman he has loved since she was 14 years old. My niece has lost her mother and her best friend. My niece is one of the smartest 8 year olds I’ve ever seen and I assure you her mother taught her, she is just like Wendy in her “what can i do for you” mentality. My nephew is only 8 months old and it was a battle between my niece and Wendy as to was going to love the baby the most, who was going to hold him, who was going to feed him. He’s not going to know how much his mom loves him. This is the worst thing that could have happened and I’m so very sorry that I was not there to help her as she helped me. I was there to hold that baby boy at the hospital for days. He clung to my daughter just to be held as he was held all the time by his mother. It tore me apart to have to rip my own daughter away from his crib in the ICU unit because she didnt’ think the nurses gave him the attention he needed, or held him and comforted him as she did. She still cries because we had to leave him crying and reaching his little arms out for her. I was there to hear my niece tell me how bad the shots hurt when they put her stiches in, and also tell me that she missed her mom. Then turn around and ask me if there was anything she could do for me, just the same way her mom would have done. Wendy did a great job raising her into a confident, caring and smart little girl. One of the reasons she did want to stay in West Palm Beach was because of the school my niece went to . It was so important to Wendy that she have a real chance at a good education that she wouldnt get in the piece of crap schools Macon GA has to offer. I will be there as she goes thru court. I know she will be sent away, Im not saying that this should go unpunished, but she is no monster and lives are forever changed. I’ll be there for you Wendy. I promise I will be there, so you can see my face and know how much I love you. I will be there to make sure those kids know their mom loves them. I won’t ever let them forget and I will fight for you as long as it takes. This is a time you should be praying, not only for my niece, nephew and my brother, but also for Wendy. In an instant, thru depression and cries for help that went unanswered, a tragic event took place. Don’t pass judgement on things you dont’ know about, dont’ wish death upon my sister, dont’ pretend you could have done better, you dont’ know and you dont’ have a clue who or what you are talking about. Those of you who have never had to go thru this, count your lucky stars and say a prayer for the ones who have. And always remember that these are stories the those children will read one day. Think of them as you say horrible nasty things about their mother. The mother that my niece right now says she misses. My niece is smart enough to know that her mom is sick right now, and even though she knows mom is sick and mom did a horrible thing, she loves her, she is NOT glad mom is gone. So yes people, it is very possible for a very loving and devoted wife and mother to actually SNAP…it happens, I know, it happened right here in my family.
So with that said, kiss my ass and sweep your own porch before you go sweeping someone elses.
11:07 pm on December 23rd, 2008
**that’s really kind of a shitty thing to say jackass**
**I dont reside in Macon, GA anymore, but let me explain one thing to you, I’m BIBB county born and bread and i say BRING IT BITCH, the big sister has something for you**
11:18 pm on December 23rd, 2008
Kelly, ever heard of paragraphs? Well, she deserves whatever punishment that is going to be given to her. She killed her children, which is an all around sad situation. Really, she should have snapped and killed herself instead of killing them. Hence, the quote, she should have swallowed all the pills and went to sleep forever. Depression is a hard thing to conquer. It’s even harder when you have children. I’m sorry for the loss of your niece and nephew, but I’m not sorry for the comments that have been stated above about your Sister in law. She deserves every last one of them. My compassion is for the children, not her.
But, I believe that she will be put somewhere where she can get better once the justice system runs it’s course.
11:47 pm on December 23rd, 2008
Kelley,
You probably googled your sister’s name and came across this site, saw what was said and naturally came to her defense. You love her anyone would. I am also pretty sure that you did not take a look around before posting. The majority of those “featured” on DD are sick, horrible people. Everyone here has a child , parent, friend, or relative that we can relate to as a victim in any of these stories. And as parents, relatives, and loved ones, I think that people (me at least) automatically feel the need to defend the victim’s in these cases. Think of the Casey/Caylee Anthony case… Before your own family tragedy, did you think “oh poor casey, she must have snapped and did those horrible things to her daughter?” I know I didn’t ! As a human, I want to her to hurt like little Caylee did. I want to do my part to defend that poor baby, and since I can’t get my hands on her, I feel the need to bash her. Somehow it makes ME feel better. That’s just me, good or bad. I am not comparing your sister to Casey, just trying to show how easy it is to want to come to the defense of the victims who can’t speak for themselves. I believe that Wendy lost her ever loving mind temporarily and unlike most of the other pyschos featured here Wendy will, if she hasn’t already, realized what she’s done and will be her own worst enemy. That to me is more tragic than most of the other stories on here. Many of those others will never realize what they have done, so they can never truly be sorry.
I was the one who said it’s too bad that she didn’t take the pills and sleep forever. With all due respect , when Wendy is better I am sure she will wish she could have “slept forever” if it meant not hurting her kids.
As far as I can see the majority of the posters stated that they felt that she had snapped and it seems out of character for her. So in closing, please look around and see why we (or just me) have took it upon ourselves to “sweep other people’s porches”
I really, truly hope that Wendy gets better and has many happy memories with her kids and her family. She is lucky to have you in her corner.
12:01 am on December 24th, 2008
“She sure did snap, looking at her myspace I kinda feel bad…She obviously loves the kids” (hmmmm looks I was defending her)
“Still,she should have swallowed the pills and went to sleep…. forever…. very sad.”</
(hmmmmm kill myself, or kill my kids…… ok ! I pick offing myself…. very sad to have to choose)
calling me a jackass was not very Christmas like and infact very hurtful, especially after that kind message I wrote. bah humbug!
12:04 am on December 24th, 2008
Thankfully, by gods hand the children are alive and making full recoverys as we speak.
12:11 am on December 24th, 2008
sorry, my bad….I got all these baby killing articles in my head that I think that every case here is about parents killing their children. I’m glad they’re doing good. I hope that she gets the help that she needs and I hope the children will be put in loving homes while their mother gets better. Good luck and happy holidays!!
5:35 am on December 24th, 2008
Kelly,
Thank you for posting. I have not once suggested harm come to Wendy. Never would. I KNOW depression first hand and therefore choose not to throw stones from my glass house. I never (physically) hurt my kids while in the abyss – but I’ll never forget that ONE time the thought of ending their suffering and mine crossed my sick mind for a few seconds. Had drugs or alcohol played into the mix – today might be very different as I’d probably either be dead or serving my 21st year in prison.
My circumstances were very similar to Wendy’s. I had recently given birth to my second child, we had moved thousands of miles from ALL of my family and friends and my husband was never there. I was “trapped” on a 230 acre farm with no phone, no car, bare cupboards and very little heat in the middle of winter. My husband had basically abandoned us in those conditions to go get drunk every day, only to come home and verbally – and eventually physically – abuse me for daring to want formula or milk for our 2 kids. It took more strength than I ever thought I had – but I grabbed my babies one morning, walked 1/2 mile (carrying 2 small children in the middle of winter) to the nearest house, called my parents and within a couple of hours, we were on a plane headed back to Florida (from Ohio [what I refer to as my 8 mos. in hell]) and a new beginning.
I honestly pray Wendy gets help more than anything else. I hope she can one day be reunited with her children and husband and be a better, stronger person. It’s gonna be a long, tough road to get there though. I wish the best for all of you, especially at this time of year. You’re a good sister and Wendy is lucky to have you fighting for her. Stay strong cuz the battle has just begun.
Happy Holidays to you and yours.
2:31 pm on December 24th, 2008
Amen Kelley I Love Wendy too. The Bible says Do not Judge or you too will be Judged in the same way you Judge others and with the measure you use you will be measured. No one knows what she has been through until they have walked in her shoes. She is and has always been the sweetest person I know. She would walk that extra mile for anyone, and now that she needs help, Do you turn your back?
5:22 pm on December 24th, 2008
Just curious…. would you be judging us for judging her with the judgement that the judges judge with???? Honestly you would have been better off saying “YEAH what she said”
7:28 pm on December 25th, 2008
It’s not for either of us to judge her or anyone. But it’s wrong for anyone to condem with out knowing the story. What you know iswhat the news reported. Not the person or the pain.
9:07 pm on December 25th, 2008
. I was “trapped” on a 230 acre farm with no phone, no car, bare cupboards and very little heat in the middle of winter. My husband had basically abandoned us in those conditions to go get drunk every day, only to come home and verbally – and eventually physically – abuse me for daring to want formula or milk for our 2 kids. It took more strength than I ever thought I had – but I grabbed my babies one morning, walked 1/2 mile (carrying 2 small children in the middle of winter) to the nearest house, called my parents and within a couple of hours, we were on a plane headed back to Florida (from Ohio [what I refer to as my 8 mos. in hell]) and a new beginning.
I had my mom read this post Zibarro.My mom has no clue what so ever on how to use a comp(even though I have bought her one).But your story just rang so true.As I said earlier my birth father stabbed me in the head at 6 months old and it was over baby formula.He was a army golden glove boxer that used my mom as a practice bag I guess.He was an alcoholic and abused her for 10 yrs before I was born.He never touched my 2 brothers though.On the day he stabbed me,he walked into the apt with a case of beer and my mom had no formula for me and thats what the money was supposed to be for.So she said for once in her life she decided enough was enough and picked up the case of beer and tossed it off the 3rd floor balcony and it shattered all over.So I guess he decided that since I was the one that needed the baby formula
get rid of me and get rid of the problem of having to buy baby formula and he stabbed me 2xs in the head with a fork he picked up!My grand- dad(his dad) and my uncle (his brother )showed up right before police and ambulance and beat the fuck outta him .I was 6 months old when it happened and I think just from hearing whisperings from family members is the only way I know about it.I never saw him,my mom was extremely close to his family and I was brought up around them to an extent but she never allowed him within a hundred miles of my brothers and I.She moved us 1000 miles south in the middle of the night just so he wouldnt know where we were because he always threatened to kill us and then himself.Depression and alcoholism go together more then people think.I am so happy you were also able to get away from your abusive husband!!
9:56 pm on December 25th, 2008
{{{{whispers_wing}}}}
That’s me hugging you! How awful for your entire family! Thankfully you were young enough not to remember it — but I’m sure hearing about it hurts as well. To think your own parent would harm you in that way and not apologize or get help – it’s awful. Bless your mom for being so strong and standing up for her kids. I wish today’s parents understood what ours did and we did — kids ALWAYS come first. No penis – even if you’re married to it is more important.
To this DAY – my oldest kids (now 22 and 21) have attempted to have a relationship with their “father” – but he makes plans with them and then never shows up. I NEVER kept him from them yet he has seen them a mere 3 times since our final break-up in 1989. My only condition upon him seeing them was that it be supervised (he certainly hadn’t proven he could take care of children) My daughter has forgiven him (my son isn’t so sure he deserves forgiveness yet), but he still can’t manage to show up for them. They’ve both been talking about letting go for good. I hope they can.
Parents have such a strong hold on kids (most of the time) even when they are absent from their lives. I suspect Wendy’s kids will forgive her for this and love her just as fiercely as they ever have. They may cringe when something in her behavior reminds them of that day — but eventually it will fade to a bad memory.
I do pray for all of them. It’s gonna be such a long road… but worth it in the end.
Thank you whisper for sharing. Sometimes I get nervous about sharing my stories in public – but then I remember how awesome you all are.
And whisper? Tell your mom I said “You Go Girl!” for throwing that beer off the balcony! Something I always wanted to do – but never had the balls to follow thru on! lol. Always figured my ex would make sure I followed right after that case. No way your mom could have known dad would turn around and stab YOU because of it! Dayum!
Hope everyone had a Merry Christmas and stays safe!
10:24 pm on December 25th, 2008
Your welcome and I know what you mean about posting some things lol.Have had alot of things in life but not sure sometimes on whether to post it.Yeah my mom has never remarried ,worked full time as a welder for yrs(and shes a small woman)
so we would have everything.The beer off balcony and stabbing was my moms turning point .She had taken it for yrs from him,he would threaten suicide all the time if she left with us.I guess he would lay on bathroom floor blocking door saying he was gonna kill himself and after sooooooo many times she asked where gun was so she could get it for him and before anyone jumps on me I know thats not what you do when someones saying that but that was last time he threatened it ,she called his bluff.And was your kids dads name gary??lol.After I married and had my 2 I tracked him down and I really have no clue why but he said not to call back because his wife didnt want him around his kids I guess.He would say hes sending things for kids never showed up and that just made me wake up to the fact he hadnt changed.But I got a phone call one night 7 yrs after he said not to call and he called to tell me he was dying.And I said”why is it men like you and some women cut off kids for decades and as soon as you find your dying you all want to just walk in and act like nothing ever happened and look for pity when you didnt want anything to do with us.” And as cold hearted as this is going to sound I hung up on him,why think you can abuse kids/women and all sorts of things then pop up decades later wanting pity!
3:26 pm on December 31st, 2008
I know Wendy. My husband and his sister are like family to her. I can’t write anything in defense to her actions because just like everyone else I can’t imagine any situaton or reason that you would hurt your children. I can only say to the people posting comments about what she did that she loves her children and I know that first hand. I’ve seen her how much she loves them. Wendy grew up in a troubled enviroment. She would never be the type to do what she did, so for all of the people passing judgement, who don’t know her, don’t think that you would be above “snapping” and doing just what she did.Wether it be troubled childhoods, drug addictions, or whatever the case, normal, loving people, lose thierselves everyday and do the unimaginable things for reason they will never even know, so rather than sit on your high horse and pass judgement, why not put them in your prayers.Wendy, Little Wc, Whisper, we love you!
4:06 pm on December 31st, 2008
Actually I think of Wendy everyday I really hope that she’s ok as well as the kids and that somehow she can forgive herself. Which by far is the biggest obstacle to face. Everyday she will have to face herself. As I said from the very beginning I could tell that she “snapped” the only negative thing I said about WENDY is that she should have taken the pills herself, because as a mother, I know I would wish I did it to myself before I hurt my kids and I am willing to bet she feels the same.
4:43 pm on December 31st, 2008
Whoa…. quite the story Whisper. Just want to say that you are amazingly strong as is your mother. I know first hand how hard it is to get away and overcome a life like that…. so congratulations, you are a survivor.
Amen to that……
5:39 pm on December 31st, 2008
<
Thank You both but it was my mom who was the strong one I was 6 months old.I really dont remember him at all except for bits and pieces and I think thats just from memories of people talking about stuff that went on.She was with him 10 yrs and had both my brothers and he never touched them it was always her but I guess by the time I came I was in the way of his booze.But my moms is a very strong person as I have said.The first time he touched one of us was when he stabbed me and that was the end so anyone in a abusive relationship leave theres always a way out,,
6:10 pm on December 31st, 2008
This woman brought intense and irreparable damage to the two people in her life that deserved it the least. I’m sorry – but if that doesn’t warrant judgment, I’m not sure what does.
Now, that’s not to say that the judgment should rest on her. Having witnessed severe psychological illness first hand, I’ve always had a soft spot for those who appear to suffer from it. I understand that people really can lose themselves entirely. Under those circumstances, my judgment shifts to those around that person who stood idly by while they watched the person they claim to love tailspin into oblivion.
To Kelly, I say… Embrace your regret. You deserve every ounce of it. You sit here and righteously defend her while, in the very same breath, you admit that YOU KNEW she was depressed, battling drug addiction, without her support system, and even that she got MORE depressed after her son was born. Christ. You speak of small minds? How many MORE red flags does a person need before they jump into action! Maybe I’d understand more if the family wasn’t in driving distance. This woman was a prime candidate for post-partum psychosis (which I would say she was suffering from) and you twittled your goddamn thumbs.
Please tell me that you are either painfully daft or desperately broke. Otherwise, “Gosh, I’m sorry I didn’t take the situation more serious but I’ll help you try to pick up the pieces,” it a pretty pathetic contribution. Sounds harsh? Yeah, it’s harsh – but not NEARLY as harsh as the reality that this situation could have been prevented.
Let this be a lesson to those lurking. Keep an eye out for smoke. When you spot it, do whatever you have to to put out the flames, lest your family be ravaged by this sort of tragedy.
6:41 pm on December 31st, 2008
Someone had to say it. I just couldn’t post after Kelly – the words were too bitter in my mouth. I didn’t have harsh judgement for Wendy Harden. I know post partum psychosis is real, horrifying and devestating – I’ve seen someone I know suffer it, so I withold judgement for a bit in cases like this. I can’t fathom listening to someone I dearly loved cry and cry whenever I spoke to her, and not rearrange my life for a bit to travel one state away in order to take care of her and assess the situation (and I’m no nurturing personality.) Especially if it were family, I knew she was isolated, and children were involved. A new baby, even. I’d have fucking moved heaven and earth to get there. How the hell could someone not have driven a day? Sent her and the kids some bus tickets? Something?! What, she was previously known for weeping into the phone on a regular basis just for kicks? People knew she was in trouble. It baffles me. It’s tragic. Next time throw someone a lifeline, yeah? Then there won’t be so much of the personal guilt even if should it fail.
3:51 pm on January 2nd, 2009
let me tell allyallfuckers, yall dont know her and yall wasnt there so until you walk in her shoes that day you will never know why it happened i ve known her for almopst 30 years and she loved them kids and when shes realized what happened she willprobably kill herrself. her husband was is apiece of shit she could have been goin through post partum only god knows what happened and it happened for a reason speak your mind well who the hell are yall to judge a damn soul look in the mirror this girl has a family that is goin through alot already they need encoragement more the kids are fine they are with their grandmother already out the hospital by the grace of god just remember this could happen to u or someone u love or one of your family members because noone thought in a billion years she would do this think about it
4:10 pm on January 2nd, 2009
brandy-girl…seriously…a period. Just one anywhere in that wall of words would have made your response more legible and a lot less like a word search puzzle. I am still not sure what I read. At one point I thought it was a treasure map and then the next, directions on the assembly of a piece of IKEA furniture.
4:22 pm on January 2nd, 2009
Christ on a crutch, she’s known Wendy almost 30 years but still chooses a screen name that ends in “girl”? I guess we should be glad she didn’t pick “–+BaBeeGurrrlll+–” or some shit.
But thanks, I finally got that Ikea entertainment center put together. Opened the bottom drawer and damned if I didn’t find a chest of jewels and gold pieces!
4:30 pm on January 2nd, 2009
Morbid and Lizard – y’all said it perfectly! I was reading it like “What the hell?”
Brandy – did you just skip over the comments where a lot of us actually expressed SYMPATHY for Wendy? Where we hoped and prayed she would be able to recover, get treated and once again (in a better state of mind) be with her children?
OR – are you just pissed because SOME on here attacked her family and “friends” that KNEW she was falling fast – yet did NOTHING to cushion that fall? I think THAT’S it. YOU are offended for YOU not for Wendy. Tough shit. Deal with it. YOU and the rest of her “friends” failed her. Everyone who listened to her crying night after night, who knew her history with depression and made excuses for not running to help her — you all share responsibility for what she did. The burden is on her – but none of you are clean. I hope she dumps you all and finds REAL friends once she is better.
7:44 pm on January 2nd, 2009
In the morning I take a SSRI. In the evening I take a benzodiazepine. Without the selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor and the benzodiazepine I don’t sleep because the nightmares of war, death, killing, murder, and suicide wake me at night. Before I started on the medications I was becoming paranoid as a result of sleep deprivation.
Have I established my bona fides to your satisfaction yet?
Dear God I hope not. That is absofuckinglutely the last thing those kids need. And if you cannot keep from making that cold-hearted observation within her hearing then maybe you should, oh I don’t know, not spend any time around her any more.
Quite possibly. Add to that the pain pills and the apparent alcohol and one has A Situation on their hands. I have seen it in my own family.
My family members had friends that helped them through, though.
I will. Thanks.
I the hell am somebody that knows the long and hard road this girl has to walk. (Yes, “girl”. I am old enough to be her daddy.) I can’t walk in her shoes any more than she can walk in mine. My plumbing isn’t such that I can carry a baby, and with her bad back she will never be a GI, much less a noncommissioned officer. I know the road well, though.
The kids’ momma doesn’t need any encouragement to off herself. What she needs is support as she learns to deal with the depression and with the psychosis that can accompany it and as she learns the signs that she needs to get some help because she is headed for a crisis.
What she needs is a friend.
I have seen it happen in my own family. The people had friends that helped them through. I do not recall a single friend that said that the person would probably kill themself when they realized what they had done. While it is quite possible somebody did say something similar, they sure weren’t friends — or weren’t for very much longer after word got back.
–Al
8:07 pm on January 2nd, 2009
Drugs. Plain and simple. Snapped? Yeah more like mommy got high and thought her babies were out to take her stash. I hope the bitch gets the broom treatment in prison. I pray her 8 year old can recover from the atrocity enough to live a normal life.
8:21 pm on January 2nd, 2009
Al – I’m so glad you are doing better. Thank God you (and/or your family) saw the signs soon enough to treat them. Best of luck.
You have to MINE.
Thank you for your service, Al. Sorry it has had such a negative impact on your mental well being. I’m sure you’ve seen things I can only imagine – and then some. So – Thank you again!
Amen. With friends like Brandy, it’s no wonder Wendy felt she had no one to turn to. How encouraging she is! NOT!
8:44 pm on January 2nd, 2009
Ok seriously…. Morbid…. between this and the shitty airplane story you have me in tears laughing….. too funny!
Amen to that….
9:11 pm on January 2nd, 2009
Thank you, Zibarro. I am sleeping through the night now and my dreams, while stranger than Hell sometimes, are not keeping me awake any longer.
There was really only one event that sowed seeds for my subsequent clinical depression with PTSD features that can be described as “service-related”. Everything else was either unrelated except that it happened while I was still in or post-military.
–Al
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