Stevie Marchand: Huff Huff, Spark Spark, BOOM!
October 27, 2008 by impqueen
The car says, “Owww.”
Longmont, COÂ - Stevie Marchand, 18, and two 16-year-old girls were sitting in Stevie’sStevie reviews
stepbrother’s car on Thursday afternoon. They weren’t bothering anybody, just minding their own business, huffing the fumes off two cans of aerosol – one mango-pineapple, one strawberry-raspberry. One of the girls got a little high and decided it was a good time to light up a cigarette.  That’s where the BOOM! comes in.
None of the teenagers attends high school. Which is pretty obvious, since I think they cover “flame + flammable gas = ignition” in science class. The fumes from the aerosol cans had crept into the ventilation system of the car, and when the gas cloud ignited, it blew out the entire dash of the Toyota.   The force of the explosion was so powerful that it blew the car’s sunroof into a tree, took out the car windows, and made the sedan go “crunch”.
I don’t think Stevie Marchand’s stepbrother’s insurance is gonna cover that.
I think what we have here is called “epic fail”.  Horrid-smelling aerosol? Check. Cigarette lighter and smokes? Check. Nicer car than necessary? Check. High school dropouts? Also check. WowWow reviews. Burny skin, melted hair, lung damage and no brain cells? Sounds HAWT. Stevie’s Myspace is private, but she looked pretty enough before she blew up the car. I wonder if that’s her baby in the picture with her?
Marchand and the girl in the front seat got first-degree burns, and the 16 year old in the backseat got second-degree burns – the really painful kind. All three teens were taken to a Longmont hospital for treatment.
Two witnesses nearby had seen the girls and heard them listening to loud music for about an hour before the explosion. When the car went “boom”, the men thought they heard a cat screaming and ran to check. The “cat” was not a cat screaming at all, but the girl in the backseat, who was already crawling out a broken window.  The witnesses didn’t see a fire, but smelled a sweet, fruity scent before it was overpowered with the smell of burning hair.  Sounds delightful.
So far, nobody’s been charged, but I bet that a couple of girls are really, really grounded right now. Police say they are considering whether to file charges for illegal use of inhalants and may also charge Marchand with contributing to the deliquency of stupid minors.
If anyone knows who these wannabe Darwin winners are, hit an imp with a MyspaceMySpace
, willya? I’d love to see what their hair looks like now.
Thanks to The Morning Star in our forums, without whom I’d have had to make up a title.
12:14 pm on October 27th, 2008
I beg of our readers…if anyone knows who these girls are PLEASE get us the information. I hate that they got hurt, but the imagery, along with the picture above, reminds me of myself and my friends (not the aerosol part…we had weed and alcohol…er, I mean Bibles and crucifixes) hanging out in parking lots getting high…er mean, talking about how cool Jesus is.
Anyway, I got a good laugh and I would LOVE to get some Myspace pages.
12:30 pm on October 27th, 2008
Jesus IS cool. Silly Morbid.
Stevie Marchand’s Myspace is up. I really wonder if that’s her baby. If so, baby, I’m sorry your mommy is kinda stupid.
12:34 pm on October 27th, 2008
At risk of sounding like the most inconsiderate ass alive…
Yeah, actually, I won’t. I’m sure you can all GUESS what I might have to say about this situation.
12:35 pm on October 27th, 2008
lmao….I got a laugh from the story and a bigger laugh from your comment Morbid.
Although I am also sorry that these kids got hurt. But geez…….. talk about not using common sense
12:36 pm on October 27th, 2008
This reminds me of a high school classmate of mine who set a shrub outside the school on fire playing with hair spray and a lighter. Luckily, in that instance nobody was hurt (although it earned him the nickname “Moses” for the rest of the year).
It’s a shame that these girls are still swimming in the shallow end of the gene pool.
12:38 pm on October 27th, 2008
Good grief. I think I’d much rather catch my kid smoking a joint.
12:46 pm on October 27th, 2008
I can’t fault them too much, being teenagers and such…God knows it is pure, dumb luck me and my friends weren’t killed during some of our get togethers.
Being from the ’80s, which may not have changed much now I guess, we LIVED in our cars. Idiocy knew no bounds when you got a group of us in one car, or God forbid, a group of cars full of a group of teens.
Since I feel akin to these three geniuses in some respect, and the fact that no one died, I feel no guilt in laughing at the image I have in my head…an image with three teenage girls sitting in a car staring forward, with singed, frizzed out hair, faces smudged black and a splintered cigaratte dangling from a wide-eyed girls mouth with a lighter poised by her lips…this moment froze for a few seconds, before the rearview mirror falls off the windshield.
1:14 pm on October 27th, 2008
Sorry they got hurt, but not too much. Just plain stupid, everyone knows when you’re huffing, you’re supposed to do it in a well ventilated area
1:22 pm on October 27th, 2008
When I was younger I was at a party and these guys were out side blowing fireballs with grain alcohol. One of the kids caught a back wind and his whole face caught in fire. Ugh he came back inside and the whole place smelt like burnt hot dogs and he had some pretty nasty burns. He healed fine with no scaring or anything. So this took me back and kinda made me chuckle.
1:25 pm on October 27th, 2008
Heh. As someone who was a Darwin teen in a previous incarnation, I am with you on the laughter, Morbid, as are my memories involving spray-painting stuff in steam tunnels (yes! while smoking!) and still other memories involving things like nitrous oxide, cars, and cigarettes.
In short, this is a funny story…and, once again, for the 12,000,000th time, I have reason to thank my lucky stars!
1:26 pm on October 27th, 2008
<  The witnesses didn’t see a fire, but smelled a sweet, fruity scent before it was overpowered with the smell of burning hair.  Sounds delightful.
I LOLed at that paragraph,then felt bad. Okay not so bad….. I laughed again.
That some Wile E. Coyote/Tom and Jerry shit…
1:29 pm on October 27th, 2008
p.s.
I don’t know if any of you were lucky enough in your teens to know people (er, guys) who thought it was funny to light their farts on fire. With apologies for the grody story here, I thought I would share that one such fart-lighting Darwin teen of my own acquaintance distinguinshed himself by burning his inner butt area when the flame was sucked back up in his butt due to poorly-executed fart-lighting.
1:45 pm on October 27th, 2008
No wonder I’m so indignant. I guess I was part of the less than 1% of the population that wasn’t absolutely retarded as a teenager.
Perhaps the information available to some of our older members was different when they were growing up, but these days, kids know better than to pull something this insanely stupid by the end of elementary school.
I’m not sorry these kids got hurt…not even a little bit. Let’s be real, now – This incident may very well have saved their lives. If they are still this willfully reckless so close to adulthood, you better believe these kids are also doing things like texting while driving, driving drunk, maybe even other activities that not only put them at risk, but also the lives of others. I only hope this incident hurt and scared them badly enough to make an impression and cause some behavioral corrections.
Boy, I’m a curmudgeony youngster, aren’t I.
1:49 pm on October 27th, 2008
We used to do something just as stupid. You would simply depress the lighter mechanism that let out the butane, without hitting the flint. You would do this in your mouth, and then once you have had enough of filling your mouth with the flammable vapor, you simply opened your mouth, and breathed out lightly towards an ope flame…creating a cheap fireball.
Of course, some people couldn’t do this right and hilarity would ensue. One guy in particular, Mike Estes, attempted this trick while we all sat in a booth at a restaurant. He wasn’t center of attention or anything, as people did it all the time…but he put a little too much butane in his mouth, and didn’t breath out good enough on a flame that was too close to his mouth. So of course, he had a mini fireball ignite in his mouth.
Luckily, he didn’t inhale, and to our delight, he exhaled and we all laughed as his moustache and long bangs caught on fire. Mike then began a Three Stooges impersonation as he attempted to put his face out with rapid slaps to his face with both hands. All of this took about 2 seconds…but seeing it…and him with his top lip blistered and his hair smoking…pretty much made me almost piss my pants with laughter. Thanks Mike, you big dolt.
1:52 pm on October 27th, 2008
And a real hit at parties too, I suppose!
I’m the one that should be telling you to get off my lawn!
I LOVED being in the dumb teenager crowd. I had a fucking BLAST. Oh the stories I could tell that were derived from complete stupidity and just wanting to see what would happen if we just don’t pull over for that cop.
2:17 pm on October 27th, 2008
Fun is relative. I had a great time growing up, and didn’t need to risk my life on a regular occasion to do so. In fact, I can look back on my life and tell you that there’s been no extended period that wasn’t fun as the result of injury, drug habits, pregnancy, incarceration, being broke or any of the other potential bi-products of being reckless. Moderation is key – I may not have as much fun on any single occasion as the individual who throws caution to the wind, but in the long run, I’ll almost undoubtedly have more of it.
2:28 pm on October 27th, 2008
dumbasses…..obviously you can still get high even without working braincells…
2:34 pm on October 27th, 2008
My nephew was 12 when his best friend died from huffing. I hope these girls understand just how lucky they are that all they got was some fried hair and skin.
On a lighter note (no pun intended) WOOHOO, someone did something stupid and they aren’t from Florida.
2:36 pm on October 27th, 2008
Anyone who makes that statement is wound too tight. Get your ass to NC, Athena! I got just what you need to loosen you up a bit! Holla!
btw, I’m just busting your chops, girl. I know you’re hardcore.
2:52 pm on October 27th, 2008
Where are you at Morbid, hee hee – Kidding, but I do have to agree we always were in the car taking “bake rides”. Just so glad I didn’t have any experiences like that. Fun times, it’s a wonder I am still compentant, although others (including DD’ers) might think differently.
2:58 pm on October 27th, 2008
Morbid, Morbid, Morbid…I’ve seen enough farts lit and amateur fire-blowers for one lifetime. I’m gonna need something a little more enticing than that, I’m afraid. And I’ll need a sleeping bag…I am NOT sleeping on that couch.
I know you’re just giving me a hard time. I front like I’m all tighly-wound, but I keep bugging my real life friends to come by and visit me here. One day, one of them actually will, and I’ll be totally busted. I’ll be forced to dismount my high horse and, while my legs could use a stretch after all this time, I’m not looking forward to it.
3:03 pm on October 27th, 2008
Damn…and I was going to tell knock-knock jokes and put a lampshade on my head…
3:10 pm on October 27th, 2008
Jokes? Here’s a bad one, that I’m not even sure how to type (it works better spoken):
Q.: Why can’t ghosts conceive?
A.: Because they have halloweenies!
Har, har, har.
Okay, I’m done. But if that doesn’t prove that I’m a hit at parties, I don’t know what will.
3:16 pm on October 27th, 2008
You got me beat. I usually use the fake ice cubes with flies in them, or a tie that rolls up when I pull a string. But you got for the throat!
3:19 pm on October 27th, 2008
You guys!!!!! I was really trying to be serious here, but you blew that all to hell.. And true, I’d rather see them smoke a doobie than all that huffin and shit.. These kids (most) are stupid enough without losing more brain cells.. Hope they learned their lesson, and I really hope that that baby is not one of their’s..
3:19 pm on October 27th, 2008
Well, you did go an put me on blast with the comment about me being “hardcore”.
I thought I’d give everyone a peek. And that’s just the tip of the iceberg, bitches!
3:24 pm on October 27th, 2008
*Groan* But I’ll use it if that’s ok
3:27 pm on October 27th, 2008
In my opinion, the best jokes are the ones that cause eyes to roll and heads to shake. That’s when I know I’ve hit my target. Please, feel free to spread the groans!
4:01 pm on October 27th, 2008
BAH HAHAHAHAHAHHAHA!!!
I love it when the pain happens to the baddies themselves, not innocents. Stupid girls. Make something of yourselves, will ya? There’s more to life than being a sperm and inhalant receptacle.
4:39 pm on October 27th, 2008
Wow, I’m surprised this never happened to any of my friends in high school. I’m lucky enough to be a friend of all the dumb daredevil kids (all the fun with no personal injury). I remember several instances where very drunk kids tried to breathe fire. They’d fill their mouths with alcohol and spit it out while holding a torch near their mouths. Of course, some of them were very drunk, and one kid accidentally lit the alcohol in his mouth on fire before spitting. Thank god he didn’t get hurt to badly, but then again it was pretty frickin’ funny.
Oh, and of course lighting farts is classic, except if you’ve accidentally spilled alcohol on your pants. My one friend Dave managed to light his pants AND the couch we had out in the field on fire. Classic.
5:27 pm on October 27th, 2008
reminds me of a xmas party we had after work few yrs back,some of the guests were dancers and hair all laquered up and 2 of them were sitting beside a bunch of lit candles we had out and all of a sudden we saw this huge poooof of flame around the one girls head,,went out as fast as it lit but stunkkkkkkkkkkk but i am still laughing just thinking about it
6:44 pm on October 27th, 2008
I seem to recall burning most of the hair off of my head when a water pipe went tits up at some point about 28 years ago. You know how awful you smell after burning your hair off and then pour nasty bong water on yourself to put it out? Yuck. What was weird is I had fairly straight hair prior to the incident but it grew out curly…
I have no problem laughing at these dumbasses. They’ve learned a valuable scientific lesson. The burns will heal before their pride does.
6:50 pm on October 27th, 2008
can someone explain flavored aerosol to me? they sell it to huff? where? we just had plain ol liquor, pot and acid.
6:55 pm on October 27th, 2008
I figured they were some sort of air freshners, myself. I’m pretty familiar with the world of quasi-legal drugs, and I’ve never heard of aerosol being flavored specifically for huffing.
But I could be wrong. The drug world moves quick.
7:22 pm on October 27th, 2008
Pretty frickin funny! Glad they survived.
Bet one of the 16 yo’s family sues the aerosol manufacture for creating a flavor enhanced substance that “inticed” the girls to try it? Only in america the land of no personal responsibility.
10:17 pm on October 27th, 2008
those would be the scents of the aerosol air fresheners they were inhaling, not flavors.
11:25 pm on October 27th, 2008
Gross! I just don’t get it. How can sucking on air freshener be considered enjoyable?
11:26 am on October 28th, 2008
(Off topic)
This is a test, this is only a test. If this was an actual post it would have been followed by official news or information…but this newbie is still uniformed.
3:10 pm on October 28th, 2008
the Darwin theory didn’t hold true they’re still in the gene pool
3:32 pm on October 28th, 2008
I don’t know if is the fact that it doesn’t hold true, as much as it sometimes misses.
4:26 pm on October 28th, 2008
It is not a theory, – it is an award that people get for removing themselves from the gene pool through stupidity. I believe that there is such a thing as honourable mention for finding other ways of not passing one’s genes on. Clearly these girls don’t qualify.
12:49 am on October 29th, 2008
Wow. I’ve always wanted curly hair and my hair won’t hold a perm. Does it have to be bong water?
12:09 pm on October 29th, 2008
Darwin theory of Evolution – Natural Selection
Yes there is a joke Darwin Award, and your right , those that don’t take themselves out of the gene pool only get honorable mention.
You can be a candidate for the top award as long as you can’t reproduce
1:11 pm on October 29th, 2008
This message was forwarded to us by our member CrazyKid from none other than Stevie Marchand. Heh.
Well all righty then.
And our member Corrupted Mistress found Stevie’s Photobucket:
http://s277.photobucket.com/albums/kk43/mini_turtle001/?start=0
and one of the other girls’ Myspaces:
http://profile.myspace.com/39936226
This is why I love our members. You guys are great detectives.
2:13 pm on October 29th, 2008
What a dipshit.
How stressful. Poor Pity ME.
HEY DUMBASS- THAT’s why you HUFF. So it won’t show up a freakin’ BREATHalyzer test. Doh.
Might not show up on a blood test either, and I bet you can’t really FEEL all those brain cells you knocked off either.
3:52 pm on October 29th, 2008
Haven’t looked at the photobucket or myspace yet — just had to comment that these 2 comments RUINED my makeup! LOL I was chuckling before them… but that soon became hilarious, tear inducing laughter!
Thanks, guys!
3:59 pm on October 29th, 2008
Young and dumb. And now – probably don’t even have their looks to fall back on like they’ve most likely done in the past.
If this isn’t a lesson learned – they are all hopelessly destined to BE Darwin Award Winners some day.
Huffing = Epitome of stupidity
4:40 pm on October 29th, 2008
That’s true.
Meanwhile, I recall lighting my bangs on fire trying to fire up the ol’ pot pipe in a park on a windy day whilst cutting class one fine day in the 11th grade. I then had to cut my bangs REALLY short. I told my mom it was the “European look.”
9:03 pm on October 29th, 2008
What the…
9:13 pm on November 8th, 2008
Wow, this credit crunch has really hit hard, when teens can’t afford proper drugs and have to HUFF, aerosol ment to make farts smell fruitiyer in a bathroom. :: rolls eyes ::
Hopefully these slightly crispy, cat screaming teens, have learned there lesson. Go back to school and do something with there lifes.
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