on dead kids on myspace had another link to another myspace of his
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction...

the banner message says HE IS CURRENTLY IN JAIL NOT SURE WHEN HE GETS OUT SO IF U WANT TO LEAVE A MSG U CAN BUT HE WONT BE RESPONDING RIGHT AWAY"

don't you luv the stupid name he has up Usre Vladimir -what a idiot

Anything new on this one? Did the child-raper get gaol-time? Did the mother get investigated by CPS? Does anybody know?

That boy's got a purty mouth... he'll be popular in prison, hopefully get exactly what's coming to him.

No prob. I've been meaning to swing by and drop a post from time to time anyway. You all have a good sense of humor and a low tolerance for stupidity, which is refreshing in contrast to some of the bleeding heart excuse makers I see stumble across my pages from time to time. Give em' hell. I know you will. =) ---Danny

Anyway….It’s nice to meet you guys. Thanks for allowing me to visit.

Thanks for stopping by, Weekly Vice. We just recently had someone sign up, and it quickly became clear that that member's activities here were intended to increase traffic at another site, so forgive me for painting you with the same brush. And, gosh, who can keep track of Morbid's friends???

Since I've been mentioned in this discussion, I want to clarify my position on a few of the comments made and then I'll get back to my own blog.

Lizard - rest assured, I don't drum up traffic by soliciting another blog. I consider Morbid a friend and will chat with him if I have something I think he might be interested in looking at.

Yes, there have been some developments in the case, but nothing has been officially discharged as of yet. If I get word of a status change before Morbid does, he knows I'll share it with him directly.

Corruptedmistress, yes my opinion has changed - but not because of the discussions posted on the blog.

Anyway....It's nice to meet you guys. Thanks for allowing me to visit.

Normally I just come here to read. I've never found the need to comment. However, I just spent the last hour reading all (yes, every single stinking last one) of the million comments left about this story over at the "other" blog previously mentioned. It was like reading a transcript from the Jerry Springer show.
I have to say...I am deeply concerned for this child (the four-year-old). There doesn't seem to be one sane person involved in this whole matter looking out for the welfare of that baby. Everyone is just bickering back and forth about their feelings, their wants, their concerns. Someone please tell me that real justice does exist in this world, because I'm afraid this is one that can't be solved and nothing but more pain and suffering awaits this poor baby.

E-Hate, you are a dumb fucking douche. THIS CHILD has SAID that DENNIS BOEHM orally raped him. Your posts are incredibly ignorant. The kid's mother may well have abused him physically. That fact, if it is indeed a fact, has ZERO bearing on whether or not the asshole you are defending orally raped this child as the CHILD SAID HE DID. Read what Kathy wrote in the message previous to mine. Your logic skills are about as shitpoor as they can be. Yes, I made up that word, SHITPOOR, just for you. You're welcome. But the word "immature," which you like to throw around, would be equally appropriate. So would the words Fuck Off. Or, rather, please do keep posting. It's very entertaining.

What this tard fails to recognize is that if this mother was as bad as he says she is, that boy was prime pickings for a pedophile. He would already be broken.

Makes me believe even more that he may have been victimized.

I can't believe that these dumb asses still hang around here....lol

P.S. Dakota, bonus points for the clever use of repetition. Yes, we notice!

Thanks Dakota for looking it up. I decided to check into it a bit too but so far, it was all claims from anonymous users that they saw what this mother is really like and she just wants attention. I have yet to read one comment where there is any proof in their statements about what they claim has occurred or is occurring. They claim that this was basically a set up to Dennis and that he was only reading this book to brush up on rape laws for his own protection and she has had 100 reports to CPS about her neglect.

Eventually it seems that the users comments swayed the blogger's opinion and he changed his write up to reflect that.

What a joke. The waekly vice is a BLOG not a news source… any more than this is a news source.

Thanks, Dakota. The title made it sound like a blog, but there was no way in hell I was going to check, in case e_hates is from there and was just trying to drum up some traffic. I'm glad you did, though, cuz now I know e_hates is even more pathetic than I originally thought.

What a joke. The waekly vice is a BLOG not a news source... any more than this is a news source. Even the admin there says "While we are not ready to say Mr. Boehm is completely innocent... If you have so much valid info and want us to also feel sorry for him, share it with the admin here. If you can back it up with facts, they will update the original post. If you check this site, you will see that they update reports frequently... and even apologize when innocence is proven.

Until then:
Dennis Boehm is still a baby raping cocksucker in my book. With friends like you, who needs enemies?? Fucking Tard.
Get it?

Hmm, I find it quite a coincidence that e_hates yahoo account was created the same day that Dennis Broehm's myspace account was "deleted". ;)

you give up? so you must really not want help for this child. If I had all of this "proof" that a child was being hurt by his mother and that she was making false allegations about this man being a pedophile, I'd sure as hell want everyone to know.

I'm sorry that saving a child is sooo exhausting for you. Dipshit.

i give up. i dont need to talk to administrators. go to the weekly vice and see. i got him to change his mind and it was exhausting.

youre way to immature for this.
goodnight all

E-hates

Very appropriate choice of userid. *massive eyeroll*
If there is proof of all of this abuse, why has the child not been taken away permanently?

What proof do you have? E-mail it to the admin. If it is enough to do an update on the story, I'm sure someone will.

i am not going to waste my time on this site if its just filled with freaks who want to secretly hear about baby raping. youre sick.

Are you fucking serious? I am not even going to rebutt that comment.

Its obvious that you are a goddamn moron. If you expect me or anyone else to take your word for it, you are seriously delusional. We've heard every excuse in the book for baby rapers. And this one isn't new.

Back it up with documented proof or go peddle your bullshit to someone who's buying.

dakota…. how can you call me a liar.

OK, You're not a liar. You're crazy. Feel better?

I am not the one who is standing by watching all the listed things you say are happening and not doing a damn thing about it.

Once again, Dennis Boehm is still a baby raping cocksucker in my book. With friends like you, who needs enemies?? Fucking Tard.

dakota....
how can you call me a liar. i have the proof.
dont worry it will all come out.
and how do i know. aww because i see the abuse you fucking idiot. i have intervened with this mom several times. she just wont stop.
and guess what i am not dennis'friend.
i am someone who needs to get the truth as well. i am not going to waste my time on this site if its just filled with freaks who want to secretly hear about baby raping. youre sick. people have called. i ahve called. his family has called. the boy was already in foster care once. the mother told the courts that his foster parents molested him as well. the boy was taken away because she fractured his skull broke his arm twice and broke his leg. she ran over his leg with the car. come on seriously.

grow the hell up.
e-hates

did you know that til this very day she beats him. bites him. starves him. sit on him. feeds him soap.

YOU should be ashamed of yourself!!! Who in their right mind would let this go on with out intervening or calling CPS? If you have such a close eye, you should have more than enough proof for the authorities.

You are either mentally ill or a big fat liar. I suspect the latter. Instead of worrying about a bunch of strangers on the internet, put your time and effort into saving that child. YOU IDIOT!!

Dennis Boehm is still a baby raping cocksucker in my book. With friends like you, who needs enemies?? Fucking Tard.

hmmm i couldnt wait to comment on here. i didnt want to have to sign up and be low. however i couldnt resist. i think that all of you on here should stop commenting nonsense. and do some damn research about this. why dont you all check out the weekly vice. you will find this exact story on it. however you will also read some commentary that will make you wonder wether or not dennis boehm is innocent or not.
now how do i know dennis is innocent
i have all of the court documents. and i have the mother of the little boy on a close eye. very close. oh and i have all of her false allegations on other people.
like for example did you know.... that this little 4 year old boy was taken away when he wa an infant because the mother cracked his skull... and later on did you know his mother broke his arm and his leg. oh and did you know that til this very day she beats him. bites him. starves him. sit on him. feeds him soap. NOPE ALL OF YOU SICK ASS HOLES DONT SEE THE OTHER SIDE DO YOU.
guess what... look it up. im on there and so are other peoples testimonies about this mother. the commentary starts out with ass holes much like yourselves. and then becomes the little boys family and dennis boehms family who are trying to help dennis and the boy. dennis boehm is innocent. and that little boy is in danger.

thanks
e_hates@yahoo.com

In short, your message FAILED! Just like your brother. (just a guess on my part, tell me I’m wrong)

Tick, tock, tick, tock...(anxiously awaiting reply from dipshit's brother(?))

HAHAHAHAHAHHA And that is why I love Harley!!!!

Bwuahahaha!

First of all who are you to judge some body just by a picture “nobody” that’s right. No, have no clue might or might not have happened you have no clue as to who these people accusing this man of this. You have no idea what might have happened to this young man as a child or what didn’t happen you have no right to judge someone. If he did do as they say yes he has problems and needs to get help for them plain and simple. You don’t know if this was done to him as a child and never tended to. I’m not saying that everyone that has been abused like this as a child as the right to go out and do the same to another child because I don’t do it.

I'll not waste time telling you who I am to judge, rather who I am NOT.

I'm not a slope headed asswipe that abused a 4 year old. I'm not a slope headed twit that forced a 4 year old to suck me off. I'm not the slope head that did so many times.

Yet here you sit judging me....

I have, as others have said, EVERY right to judge this waste of sperm and I will continue to do so.

In short, your message FAILED! Just like your brother. (just a guess on my part, tell me I'm wrong)

As for your complaints....

<img src="http://i172.photobucket.com/albums/w11/s2rider/NSFW/Give_O_Fuckmeter.gif" border="0" alt="This about sums it up"></img>R

Inyourdreams- What if this were your child that he raped? Would you be defending him then?

So, tell me, are you ignorant or just mentally handicapped?

First of all who are you to judge some body just by a picture “nobody” that’s right. No, have no clue might or might not have happened you have no clue as to who these people accusing this man of this. You have no idea what might have happened to this young man as a child or what didn’t happen you have no right to judge someone. If he did do as they say yes he has problems and needs to get help for them plain and simple. You don’t know if this was done to him as a child and never tended to. I’m not saying that everyone that has been abused like this as a child as the right to go out and do the same to another child because I don’t do it.

I can hardly understand your post, but I think you said that you were molested as a child and have chosen not to abuse children in your turn -- good for you. That makes you 1 million times a better person than Dennis Boehm. You chose not to harm others; he chose to force himself on a four-year-old.

I don't understand why you are defending him. He's the same as the person who molested you -- the very same.

First of all who are you to judge some body just by a picture “nobody” that’s right. No, have no clue might or might not have happened you have no clue as to who these people accusing this man of this. You have no idea what might have happened to this young man as a child or what didn’t happen you have no right to judge someone. If he did do as they say yes he has problems and needs to get help for them plain and simple. You don’t know if this was done to him as a child and never tended to. I’m not saying that everyone that has been abused like this as a child as the right to go out and do the same to another child because I don’t do it.

There is NO excuse for sexually abusing a child period. I don't care what was done to this sick fucker as a kid because that has shit to do with this crime. Does his brain function? Does he know it isn't legal to sexually assault a child? I'm going to go out on a limb here and answer YES he knows that. Then he is a pedophile, child rapist piece of shit so get over it.

I get so tired of being judged for judging. All people who don't judge should be put in a room full of murderers and abusers who God and the court systems haven't gotten around to yet. Then we'll see if they judge themselves safe or judge the others to be a threat. Ya gotta judge, dude.

I judge pervs who get blow jobs from 4-yr olds to be pond scum... I would not let Dennis Broehm in a room with my grandkids even if I was there.

Who are we to judge? We are society, that's who. Humans have a long history of judging each other as a way to keep social order. Well before court systems and law enforcement even existed, humans used social pressure, and shame, and ostracism, as a way of insuring the safety of the many over the desires of the few. All of us have a vested interest in enforcing the social contact for the larger good, independent of the legal system, because we are all affected by each other's actions. And often a good ol' dose of public humiliation and social pressure will accomplish what the legal system cannot. After all, far more people care about what the neighbors think, and about losing their social standing and being exiled to the margins, than they do about legal ramifications. That's why solitary confinement is such a uniquely cruel punishment--because we need the comfort and approval of other humans. And when you violate the social contract, you lose that comfort and approval. That's just the way a society works, from Ancient Greece through today.

Frankly, it seems to me that those among us who were abused in childhood have every right to judge. Because we do have a clue what any random person might have gone through, and we have walked a mile in those shoes, and those shoes stopped well short of visiting our own hell on someone else. No "there but for the grace of God," here. The very fact that plenty of abused children grow up not to become abusers undercuts the, "you don't know what he's gone through," argument; it doesn't strengthen it.

Now, for heaven's sake, read some Plato and John Rawls; learn something about history and cultural anthropology. But first, learn a little something about punctuation and grammar.

Inyourdreams -

I'm afraid you're mistaken on a few points:

1.) We have the ABSOLUTE right to judge.

2.) No matter what caused the condition, be it prior abuse or just bad hardwiring, pedophiles don't deserve "help". This sack of shit forced a little boy to go down on him, knowing full well what the potential consequences were. He made the wrong choice.
3.) We don't need to know anything other than what's posted in the article to know more about this worthless human being than we ever cared to.

But, hey - thanks for stopping by.

Huh. And I have some really big stones I wanna hurl at the greasy looking-child raping-mother-fucker. He's been arrested for making a FOUR year old suck his dick! Damn straight I'm gonna judge him!

If he hurt a child, we have every right to judge him. Whatever did or didn't happen to Dennis as a kid, he's an adult now and has to make a choice not to do that. When an adult chooses to abuse a child, he is choosing to be publicly shamed, made fun of, embarrassed, judged, and taunted. He is also choosing to be caught and punished in a court of law.

We are not a courtroom. Rather, we are the public humiliators, the stone-throwers, those who speak for the little child who was molested.

If your guy turns out to be innocent, we'll publish that. We always do, on the two or three very rare occasions that's happened. If he's convicted, will you come tell us you were wrong?

First of all who are you to judge some body just by a picture "nobody" that's right. No, have no clue might or might not have happened you have no clue as to who these people accusing this man of this. You have no idea what might have happened to this young man as a child or what didn't happen you have no right to judge someone. If he did do as they say yes he has problems and needs to get help for them plain and simple. You don't know if this was done to him as a child and never tended to. I'm not saying that everyone that has been abused like this as a child as the right to go out and do the same to another child because I don't do it.

Very true. All I wanted to say is that life ruining is taking it a little far. Everyone seems to be insisting that this WILL without a doubt harshly affect this boys life. Maybe it will, maybe it won’t. I hope not. But I do not like the insistance that any childhood sexual abuse will alter you so dramatically or ruin you forever. But then again, I am stronger than some.

You are right Nell it doesn't have to be life ruining and I am glad you were able to deal with what happened to you. We just can't predict how a victims life with be effected. I hope this little guy gets the help he needs and he is never subjected to abuse again.

I love Mom of 4 too. I just thought people might have missed that Athena said not life ruining. I never said it didn't alter your life. Every trauma, and every good thing, alters your life in some way.

The bottom line is that sexual abuse of any kind changes who you are and whether it ruins the life of the victim isn’t determined by the type, length or severity of the abuse. We are all different and things effect each of us differently. There is no right or wrong way to feel when you are a victim.

Very true. All I wanted to say is that life ruining is taking it a little far. Everyone seems to be insisting that this WILL without a doubt harshly affect this boys life. Maybe it will, maybe it won't. I hope not. But I do not like the insistance that any childhood sexual abuse will alter you so dramatically or ruin you forever. But then again, I am stronger than some.

...and that's why I <3 MO4.

I was abused once, non violently by an uncle. It did not ruin my life. Childhhod sexual abuse has got such a large sweep, if you know what I mean. Like, it’s all awful, but the very first touch to the brutal rape is vastly different. I have no way of knowing what this particular boy will remember, as I am not him. I have found that alot of men don’t remember things as keenly as women, but I again have no idea. Some people are also stronger than others. I just understand what Athena tried to say, and since everyone gave an example of people that it damaged in some way, I thought I would show sometimes it doesn’t.

In a nutshell no two victims react the same way. Not even 2 victims who were violated in the same manner by the same person. The bottom line is being abused as a child in any manner changes who you are. Traumatic experiences are not forgotten. They can be buried in one's memories but they are not gone for good. Children as young as 2 can and do remember painful abuse whether it is sexual or physical causing extreme pain.

Is it life altering?? Yes it is every time. Is it life ruining? That's subjective to each individual. Many victims perceive themselves as flawed or less than what they would have been had they not been abused. In that regard many victims do feel it is life ruining. You and I may look at the person's life and decide their life is not ruined however that is simply our opinion which doesn't make it reality to the victim. Other victims feel empowered to have overcome the abuse and feel they are stronger because of that. You or I might view them differently though. I have worked with victims like that who are simply in denial and cannot see it. They tell themselves and everyone else they are fine and it hasn't affected them. Some of them are work-aholics who keep themselves so busy they have no time for relationships. They avoid intimate relationships because often times the abuse affects the way they are in relationships.

The bottom line is that sexual abuse of any kind changes who you are and whether it ruins the life of the victim isn't determined by the type, length or severity of the abuse. We are all different and things effect each of us differently. There is no right or wrong way to feel when you are a victim.

The fact of the matter is, the response exhibited by someone who was abused regularly and over a period of time is going to differ from someone who was victimized once but violently which will differ from someone who was abused briefly and non-violently, etc. So, lumping them all into the same catagory to address the likely effects this boy will experience is terribly inaccurate.

I was abused once, non violently by an uncle. It did not ruin my life. Childhhod sexual abuse has got such a large sweep, if you know what I mean. Like, it's all awful, but the very first touch to the brutal rape is vastly different. I have no way of knowing what this particular boy will remember, as I am not him. I have found that alot of men don't remember things as keenly as women, but I again have no idea. Some people are also stronger than others. I just understand what Athena tried to say, and since everyone gave an example of people that it damaged in some way, I thought I would show sometimes it doesn't.

And I don't even know what asbergers syndrome is.

If this was intended to hurt me, you failed. I have no problem admitting that I don’t know everything - perhaps you should try such an approach.

You mean, by adding qualifiers like "in my opinion" or "likely", rather than stating beliefs as fact? Feel free to review the posts. I make it QUITE clear that I'm not the authority on the issue.

That wasn’t mocking you; it was a generalized statement about how I feel about how victims react; or rather, don’t react. Perhaps before assuming the worst (ie, it referring to you yourself), you should ask for clarification rather than resorting to childish names.

You expect me to buy that? You paraphrased my experience, an experience that you said no one you've met except for a sociopath with Aspergers has had, and reiterated it in such a way that denotes a blatant lack of respect for the statement. If you intended for me to take it ANY other way, you certainly missed your mark. Your entire bloody response to me was snippy and, while I might normally give people some leeway during emotional topics, you were being pretty inconsiderate.

And IMO you have a continual manner of condescension that suggests extreme insecurity - you try to prove yourself one step smarter than others, one step above, to ensure your pride remains intact. It’s not my favorite style to deal with, but I haven’t resorted to name calling. In fact I’d outright ignored your few comments to me in the forums, finding them patronizing and not worth my time.

I'm floored by the hypocrisy. You want patronizing and condescending? At least I'm willing to recognize I occasionally have a problem with that, but, you? Are you willing to accept those same labels? Or would you rather suggest with a straight face that the following is neither patronizing nor condescending?

Your stance minimizes the damage done by child rape. If you were raped as a child but it’s had zero effect on you, great. I’m happy for you. This is absolutely, positively NOT the case for 99% of the other victims out there. If you want to think of yourself as better and stronger than others for it not affecting you at all, fine. Just know your experience is not typical.

I disagreed with you quite clinically and civilly, even mentioning that I agreed with most of what you had to say, and you responded with sarcasm and contempt. You took the first shot. Since you seem to have difficulty discussing opposing viewpoints in an unemotional manner, it's just as well that you steer clear.

I was. I’m back now. All the fun stuff happens when i’m gone.

Welcome back, hope you had fun even without the joys of this place!

Incidentally, (slightly off topic) but is Imp on vacation? Haven’t seen her posting the front page lately.

I was. I'm back now. All the fun stuff happens when i'm gone. :D

…I’m not surprised to hear that your involvement in psychology is amateur.

If this was intended to hurt me, you failed. I have no problem admitting that I don't know everything - perhaps you should try such an approach.

Lastly, I’d like to address this statement: “Well, gee, I hardly ever think about it; didn’t really affect me!”

That wasn't mocking you; it was a generalized statement about how I feel about how victims react; or rather, don't react. Perhaps before assuming the worst (ie, it referring to you yourself), you should ask for clarification rather than resorting to childish names.

You’re not only an amateur, you’re kind of a jackass.

And IMO you have a continual manner of condescension that suggests extreme insecurity - you try to prove yourself one step smarter than others, one step above, to ensure your pride remains intact. It's not my favorite style to deal with, but I haven't resorted to name calling. In fact I'd outright ignored your few comments to me in the forums, finding them patronizing and not worth my time.

Perhaps a better solution would be to leave each other in peace. You can do as you wish, but that will be my MO with you from now on.

Squeaky and Dammitall, I think you are both right on. Traumatic experiences are very hard to forget, no matter what age. And there are varying degrees of sexual abuse.


Just to rein things in a little, I was responding to the suggestion that this is life-ruining. Is there life-ruining abuse? Absolutely. Is the above situation life-ruining? Probably not. Like you said, Kathy, it's a matter of degree. The abuse that took place in this case was absolutely deplorable, but we've seen much worse, haven't we? This isn't taking away from what happened, here; I'm just stating fact.

Again, I am not taking away from the heinousness of the crime committed. However, suggesting that it will ruin this child's life is unfounded, especially when, in rebuttal, people mention that the victims they know all lead mostly normal lives.

I also did not mean to insinuate that there will be no lingering effect for this child, only that this experience won't likely cause him to cease functioning (life-ruining) and that the extent of the damage has a great deal to do with how it's treated going forward.

As far as memory goes - Research suggests that, prior to the age of 5, memory is spotty and impaired, when it exists at all. He may be able to remember this event, but it's unlikely that he'll remember it with the clarity that he would had it happened to him at 8 or 9. In that respect, he may be spared a bit of grief.

SQUEAKY - You exhibit a tragic flaw in logic. Your anecodal evidence regarding "most people" and how they react to abuse would only be accurate if these people you were talking to experienced the same brand of abuse as did the victim in this case. For someone who "know[s] a little something", I'm kind of surprised you didn't even attempt to differentiate.

The fact of the matter is, the response exhibited by someone who was abused regularly and over a period of time is going to differ from someone who was victimized once but violently which will differ from someone who was abused briefly and non-violently, etc. So, lumping them all into the same catagory to address the likely effects this boy will experience is terribly inaccurate.

...I'm not surprised to hear that your involvement in psychology is amateur.

Lastly, I'd like to address this statement: "Well, gee, I hardly ever think about it; didn’t really affect me!"

If I had come out and said, "This happened to me when I was young, and I still suffer," I can only imagine the sympathy I would have gotten from you. But, because I was victimized and it didn't ruin me, it's okay to mock my response?

You're not only an amateur, you're kind of a jackass.

He was reading the “Encyclopedia of Rape?” WTF????? I do not live in a bubble by any means, but it never occurred to me that there was such a book. And in a public library? I’m totally stunned.

It is not the Encyclopedia of Rape in the way an Encyclopedia of Gardening would be about how to garden......

His myspace says he “doesn’t want kids”… Apparently this just refers to spawning them not molesting them.

I thought of that, too. Maybe they need to define "want" on these lists.

He was reading the “Encyclopedia of Rape?” WTF????? I do not live in a bubble by any means, but it never occurred to me that there was such a book. And in a public library? I'm totally stunned.

His myspace says he "doesn't want kids"... Apparently this just refers to spawning them not molesting them.

Incidentally, (slightly off topic) but is Imp on vacation? Haven't seen her posting the front page lately.

And I cringe to think that he’ll be googling for news stories about his abuse experience someday. But we can make that argument about every perp here — they all have kids who are related to them and may someday google around for info on the family dishonor. It won’t be about them personally, but it will be there for them to read about their family history, what uncle did to auntie or how big brother threw baby sis at the police officer. Shall we shut down DD? Shall we shift into soothing mode and try to make everyone feel better?

I wouldn't even Begin to suggest such a thing. Honestly I'm not at all concerned about friends and family that may run across this stuff searching. I do have a small concern over the actual surviving (direct) victims possibly having to re-live events that they had put behind them.

More of an "opening old wounds" concern.

I do agree with you that it could serve to show them that others were just as if not more outraged by the acts of their attackers.

R

And I cringe to think that he’ll be googling for news stories about his abuse experience someday. But we can make that argument about every perp here — they all have kids who are related to them and may someday google around for info on the family dishonor. It won’t be about them personally, but it will be there for them to read about their family history, what uncle did to auntie or how big brother threw baby sis at the police officer. Shall we shut down DD? Shall we shift into soothing mode and try to make everyone feel better?

I don't think there's too much we can say that will equate what the victims experienced from their abusers. It's hard to say what they'll think ten or twenty years from now, whether this info will be scarcely available, readily available, or extinct.

It may help them to see others' viewpoints on what happened to them and see that strangers were on their side.

The abusers and enablers? Fuck what they think.

And then Dammitall came to my rescue! I should scream “Dammit” more often!

Yes. Yes, you should. :) I can't guarantee it'll be at all to your advantage, but I'll certainly get a little ego boost. And royalties. I get those as well.

Some girls reason, I’m already dirty anyway, already damaged goods, might as well become as dirty as possible. (I didn’t say the psychology behind this is logical, but there are victims who think this way.)

And some girls don’t fall into the trap of promiscuity at all, whether through strong family support, religious upbringing, lack of opportunity, or other reasons.

I think some girls figure "Hey, I wasn't saving it for anything, anyway." I've heard it said among the piggier of men that if you want an uninhibited, eager-to-please wildwoman in bed, look for an abuse survivor. They're used to it, they won't cringe, and they're starving for love and attention.

I kind of suspect that the women who were forced to do things to their abusers are the ones who reject sexuality later in life, while the ones who had things done to them are the ones who seek control via promiscuity, though this theory is off the top of my head and I could be entirely full'o'shit, no surprise to anybody. :D

Promiscuity can be a girl’s way of feeling as though she’s manipulating or “controlling” men rather than being controlled by them, or, if she was abused young enough, or abused by a family member, she may have been taught that her only value is her sexuality, that that’s the way she has to earn love.

Sometimes it can even be a defense mechanism - a way to tell themselves it wasn’t that bad, that THEY control this, it’s THEIR choice. They sleep with more and more and more men, trying to convince themselves of this.

I see what you're saying and it makes sense. I hope this little boy not be damaged by this awful experience. It sounds as if he was suffering a lot already.

And I cringe to think that he'll be googling for news stories about his abuse experience someday. But we can make that argument about every perp here -- they all have kids who are related to them and may someday google around for info on the family dishonor. It won't be about them personally, but it will be there for them to read about their family history, what uncle did to auntie or how big brother threw baby sis at the police officer. Shall we shut down DD? Shall we shift into soothing mode and try to make everyone feel better?

As Gilligan would say-”I think you’re both right”! Seriously, it depends on each person’s makeup of how they will turn out. My wife is very protective of kids, one of her sisters became a slut, and unfortunately one friend who was abused became an abuser. From what I’ve seen, people lash out in different ways or become more vigilant to stop it, or fall into the vicious cycle of abuse. It’s not blaming the victim- it’s each persons mental makeup. I had friends who grew up in loving homes turn out evil and friends who grew up in crackhouses be good citizens.

Agree. Every person is an individual. Therefore everyone is going to handle an incident such as this differently.

Give me 20 minutes with this warped fuck. He’ll have memories of the time and I assure you they will haunt him the rest of his life.

and no, he is NOT going to “feel safe”

Dammit Harley, you talking like that makes me all hot and flustered. ....okay it is really fucking humid today, but ya know.....I'm just picturing your big beefiness fucking this pervert up........*fans self* Dayum it is hot up in here. hehehehehe

Squeaky and Dammitall, I think you are both right on. Traumatic experiences are very hard to forget, no matter what age. And there are varying degrees of sexual abuse.

I know of two adult women from the same family who were abused by the same pedophile. They each reacted very differently to the abuse. One became promiscuous and the other became "afraid of men." Neither one told until they were adults, but neither one ever forgot. Both were younger than the age of 6 when the abuse happened.

They both live normal lives but each has been affected very much by the abuse in their childhoods. It affects their relationships to this day. It is 100% a result of the actual abuse and NOT someone reminding them constantly that they were abused.

Dammmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmit!!!!!

And then Dammitall came to my rescue! I should scream "Dammit" more often!

Excellent explanation, D. To that I would add sometimes it is simple conditioning, as well. They may hate it, they may want to puke from it, but this is all they've ever done, all they've "ever been good for". Humans are creatures of habit.

Sometimes it can even be a defense mechanism - a way to tell themselves it wasn't that bad, that THEY control this, it's THEIR choice. They sleep with more and more and more men, trying to convince themselves of this.

(these things definitely tie into what D. already said, too.)

Some girls reason, I'm already dirty anyway, already damaged goods, might as well become as dirty as possible. (I didn't say the psychology behind this is logical, but there are victims who think this way.)

And some girls don't fall into the trap of promiscuity at all, whether through strong family support, religious upbringing, lack of opportunity, or other reasons. People handle things differently, and I do agree it's important to not assume a victim mentality - then the abuser continues to maintain control even after he's long gone. However, it is equally important not to downplay the incredible breach of trust that has occurred; to not be in denial of the consequences of what one web site called "the relational betrayal of a minor by an adult who is in a position of authority with the child and who exploits his own and victim's sexuality to subjective empower himself by utterly dominating the physical, psychological, and spiritual experiences of the victim."

Give me 20 minutes with this warped fuck. He’ll have memories of the time and I assure you they will haunt him the rest of his life.

Harley...You're Hired!!!
Feel free to stop by Lower Level 4 on your way out for any supplies you might need.

Give me 20 minutes with this warped fuck. He'll have memories of the time and I assure you they will haunt him the rest of his life.

and no, he is NOT going to "feel safe"

I still say one day I'll end up on the front page after I meet one of the sick fucks. I gotta get a DD shirt soon in case it happens sooner rather than later.



Athena,

I hope you are right, but fear you may not be about his memory of the event.
I agree 100% that if it is kept in the forefront of his memory by others not letting it go, moving forward and healing then it will be a problem later on for him.

That is the one and only fear I have about this site is that one day this kid may well have moved on and put the event behind him, only to google search something and come upon the site and have to re-live it.

Wouldn't it just SUCK that in our rush to scorn those that need it, we could later hurt ones that don't...

Not sure how I feel about that, or how one might prevent it from happening.


R

(not trying to be a downer here, just thinking out loud. tic, tic, tic...tic tic...hear it?)

However, while there are exceptions to the rule, in all likelihood, this child’s age will be of benefit to him. Because he is so young and his memory of the event may be impaired or nonexistant, and because he was young enough that concepts of right and wrong regarding sexuality had not likely been established, he ought to emerge relatively unscathed.

I disagree. Four is plenty old enough to retain the memory. In another year, he'll be in kindergarten, kids are certainly capable of learning and retaining at age four.

A young child will often appear to "forget" the abuse when their situation forces them to live with or have constant contact with the abuser. When the child is in a situation that s/he cannot escape from, it is more helpful for them to block the memory of the abuse than to constantly dwell on it. The memories tend to return full force in later years.

I would also say that by age four he has pretty clear ideas of what's right and wrong regarding sexuality. His mother has probably managed by now to impart that he should please keep his hands out of his pants in public, and please keep his clothes on. He is aware by age four that adults don't generally go showing their genitalia about, and that they most definitely do not routinely go around shoving said genitalia down their younger relative's throats.

Also, by age four, he should be past the "bug-eating" stage of infancy. By now he's aware that you don't put yukky things in your mouth. While he's too young to understand adult sexuality, he's certainly old enough to associate penises with urination and to not want to "kiss" someone's nasty old pee-pee. He may also have feared suffocation while being forced to fellate his uncle.

The fact that his mother found him "crouched on his bed" instead of sleeping or playing indicates to me that he was plenty traumatized by this, and not apt to easily forget it.

I think it mostly depends on how the event is treated going forward. If he is regularly reminded of his victimization or his family dwells on it, etc., I imagine he will be much more affected by it than if he gets some immediate counseling and then the issue is “forgotten”.

This, I agree with, with the caveat that abuse is usually traumatic for the victim's parents as well as for the victim, so it's often poorly dealt with. If the child's parents remain vigilant (though not hovering) and aware of his behavior, and listen to him, they can stay on top of issues as they occur. Let's hope they do it right.

SqueakyClean, I have never understood the psychology of this was of coping with abuse. I am not doubting you, but asking for some insight into it. I would think sexual abuse would drive a girl away from everything sexual, so it seems illogical to me that a girl would become promiscuous. I guess logic isn’t the issue, but the drive to cope. How does it work? And why don’t boys act out in the same way?

I'm not SqueakyClean (heh), but I'll tackle it.

Promiscuity can be a girl's way of feeling as though she's manipulating or "controlling" men rather than being controlled by them, or, if she was abused young enough, or abused by a family member, she may have been taught that her only value is her sexuality, that that's the way she has to earn love.

It doesn't always turn a person off of sex, rather, it can give them a stronger stomach--if Dad's the one who's "been at" you, hey, damn near anyone or any act is preferable to that.

And sexual stimulation too young can make a kid almost frantically sexual. Kids do what they've learned, after all, and when you add the fucked up emotional and psychological dynamics that go with sexual abuse, the kids can be pretty driven towards sexuality.

With boys, it kind of depends on who abused them and how young they were. If they were pubescent and abused by an older, non-related female, they may not even consider themselves abused. Abuse very young and/or by an older male when their own orientation is straight, tends to fuck them up.

A pubescent abused by an older female may wish to become promiscuous, but it is generally harder for boys to get laid than it is for girls, unless they're willing to accept male pedophiles, and I don't think these kids are likely to, whereas a boy who has been abused by an important male family member might accept or even seek out pedophiles, as a way of obtaining "love". He may also become an abuser himself, preferring to identify with the "powerful" abuser rather than with the weaker victim.

Make any sense?

I'm sure that little boy felt really safe and at ease at home while he was being babysat by this fucktard who ruined this poor baby for life.

Dammmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmit!!!!!

Wry, I just wrote an extensive response (while noting that my interest in psychology is on an amateur level - I have worked with abused populations but my actual degree is in something else) and the damn computer ATE IT when I hit enter!!! grrrr~!!!!!

I might try it again later; right now I'm too annoyed with the damn comp. In the meantime, google victims of sexual abuse promiscuous and you'll find some good answers to your questions.

It is really heartbreaking when I hear so many stories from people who were the victims of sexual child abuse. Although they can lead normal lives obviously, deep down inside I'm sure the pain doesn't entirely go away.

One reason that I pray and hope that Athena may be right, is that this boy is young enough to maybe not remember what happened, and the fact that he wasn't sodomized may help. Maybe as far as he knows, his uncle/babysitter just made him put something icky in his mouth. As disgusting as it is, I'm grateful that he wasn't sodomized or suffered physical pain, you know what I mean? And this has nothing to do with the seriousness of what this monster did or the punishment, this is just something that I am hoping for this little boy's sake.

And I would like this guy to spend a lot of time feeling very unsafe. How dare he admonish the judge? And how weird it is that his bail started off at a mere $2,000. I don't understand that either.

Many girls act out sexually as teenagers - if I hear a young girl being called a “slut”, or willingly submitting to sex with multiple guys at a time, I can guess as to her childhood.

SqueakyClean, I have never understood the psychology of this was of coping with abuse. I am not doubting you, but asking for some insight into it. I would think sexual abuse would drive a girl away from everything sexual, so it seems illogical to me that a girl would become promiscuous. I guess logic isn't the issue, but the drive to cope. How does it work? And why don't boys act out in the same way?

This is life altering and it can be life ruining. This is a traumatic event in this little 4 year olds life and I will guarantee you he will remember it. He may not remember the treat mom bought him at the store but he damn sure will remember being forced to perform oral sex.

Thank you, Momof4.

Athena, I happen to know a little something about this subject and the long-term effects it has on people and I stand by my original statement. Many are, decades later, still struggling with their sex lives, horrible flashbacks, feelings of intense violation that aren't abated even with therapy, among other things. By your logic, sexual abuse of young children isn't THAT horrific because they might just "get over it" and not just not really be THAT badly affected by it. I know you'll deny that, but it is the logical deduction.

The only other person I've ever known who says he wasn't really affected by being sexually abused as a child has Aspberger's syndrome and isn't really feelings-oriented, to put it one way. I would even disagree with his assessment of himself, because he came from a wonderful, loving family but as a teenager turned into a total psychopath, killing and torturing animals, was starting to be violent towards people, and even confessed to me later that he fantasized about molesting children, but just never was able to go through with it. (In his late 20's, he became a Christian and turned his life around and now is almost 40 and still doing well.) He is the ONLY ONE besides you that I've ever heard say that, and I've spent a lot of time talking to victims.

Everyone else I have ever known who was sexually abused still carries the baggage of it in some way. Many girls act out sexually as teenagers - if I hear a young girl being called a "slut", or willingly submitting to sex with multiple guys at a time, I can guess as to her childhood.

And... many boys DO become offenders. It's not a given - those with strength of character who don't want to hurt others, those who get help, etc, often avoid this pitfall - but many don't. Hell, I bet the assface we're talking about here was molested as a kid; I bet you anything, but I don't feel one ounce of sympathy for him since he chose to perpetuate the cycle.

People can get counseling, try to move on, try to heal, but the damage done is enormous, and MOST people don't say, Well, gee, I hardly ever think about it; didn't really affect me! Most people, it affects GREATLY.

Your stance minimizes the damage done by child rape. If you were raped as a child but it's had zero effect on you, great. I'm happy for you. This is absolutely, positively NOT the case for 99% of the other victims out there. If you want to think of yourself as better and stronger than others for it not affecting you at all, fine. Just know your experience is not typical.

“I do not feel safe in a correctional facility…I would feel very safe in a hospital,” he said.

Your nephew doesn't feel safe anymore, Asswipe. Why should you be special?

Well, his orientation says gay. What it should really say is, gay for little boys. Fucking sicko.

I wonder about his comment section. Friends are posting pictures of hunks for him. Sa-weet hunks.

There's creepy picture on his myspace of him posing in front of an enlarged photo of a mom holding a baby--the sister and nephew, I think. It's in the a photo album dedicated to pix of his nephew. Pix that only a suck fuck who reads something called The Encyclopedia of Rape would find erotic.

As Gilligan would say-"I think you're both right"! Seriously, it depends on each person's makeup of how they will turn out. My wife is very protective of kids, one of her sisters became a slut, and unfortunately one friend who was abused became an abuser. From what I've seen, people lash out in different ways or become more vigilant to stop it, or fall into the vicious cycle of abuse. It's not blaming the victim- it's each persons mental makeup. I had friends who grew up in loving homes turn out evil and friends who grew up in crackhouses be good citizens.

Hospital my ass. The place for him is in criminal college with Bubba. For a long, long time.

I think it mostly depends on how the event is treated going forward. If he is regularly reminded of his victimization or his family dwells on it, etc., I imagine he will be much more affected by it than if he gets some immediate counseling and then the issue is “forgotten”. In other words, the bigger a deal is made of it to him, the more he’ll be affected.

I agree with you, Athena. If you think as a victim, you will be.

I say this because of my own personal experience. I’m 25 with a normal sex life, no desire to offend children and, while I recall the incident, it doesn’t torture me. In fact, I only ever think about it when I read about incidents like this.

Ok I see your point. I still have to disagree. His age may benefit him, and I hope and pray it does. I just think that potentially he's ruined. I don't think he'll ever forget it no matter how much counseling he may get. Counseling teaches you to cope and deal, its not a memory eraser. I agree the potential for his "ruination" is lessened by immediate counseling, but I just don't think its a guarantee of his piece of mind or that he will not become an abuser himself.

I'm sorry for what ever happened to you and I am sooooooooooo glad that you are not "tortured" by it. I think that perhaps, you are the exception to the rule, in a good way, because you are not tortured. I only hope the child will be so lucky.

This is life altering and it can be life ruining. This is a traumatic event in this little 4 year olds life and I will guarantee you he will remember it. He may not remember the treat mom bought him at the store but he damn sure will remember being forced to perform oral sex.

Have to say Athena your comment surprises me.

I, by no means, intend to take away from the severity of the crime. The crime is horrific and the criminal should be harshly punished.

However, while there are exceptions to the rule, in all likelihood, this child's age will be of benefit to him. Because he is so young and his memory of the event may be impaired or nonexistant, and because he was young enough that concepts of right and wrong regarding sexuality had not likely been established, he ought to emerge relatively unscathed.

I think it mostly depends on how the event is treated going forward. If he is regularly reminded of his victimization or his family dwells on it, etc., I imagine he will be much more affected by it than if he gets some immediate counseling and then the issue is "forgotten". In other words, the bigger a deal is made of it to him, the more he'll be affected.

"Life-altering?" Sure. But I don't believe the odds favor "life-ruining".

I say this because of my own personal experience. I'm 25 with a normal sex life, no desire to offend children and, while I recall the incident, it doesn't torture me. In fact, I only ever think about it when I read about incidents like this.

Isn’t the victim in question 4? If so, I doubt this is life-ruining, in all honesty.

Can you clarify that, Athena? Why don't you think its life ruining? Maybe this boy won't/can't remember this. I'm not jumping your statement, I just want to understand your opinion.

I, personnally have a very vivid memory from back before this age. It actually freaked my mom out. I named off some things that I thought were dreams. She then showed me pictures of my "dreams" that were actually memories from the first place we lived. We moved out before my 2nd birthday. What if this boy's long term memory turns out to be like mine?

I have a friend whose little boy was made to do the same thing on his older cousin. The little boy was 3-4 and is, to this day, very upset by what happened to him. He can give you a vivid account of the incident and according to his dad, he still has night mares.

He's probably 9-10 now. I haven't seen them in a couple of months and don't remember where is birthday falls within the year. What if he grows up and does the same thing to another child, that will ruin his life. The pure knowledge of it is already affecting his thoughts about sex, men and women. I believe he's permanently altered. We'll have to see when he get older, if he is "ruined".

maybe not life-ruining, but it has to be life-altering, I would think.

When the fuck are we going to set up some REAL punishments for people who ruin childrens’ live? No more of this 5 or 10 years horseshit; REAL punishment. Life with no parole, executions, whatever it takes to make sure that they NEVER, EVER have the chance to hurt another child.

Isn't the victim in question 4? If so, I doubt this is life-ruining, in all honesty.

I agree with the rest, though. There's nothing wrong with exceptionally harsh sentencing for those who exhibit predatory behavior.